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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

not to pick dd from london

130 replies

LEMmingaround · 12/09/2014 13:30

Dd1 is 24 and going up to london to watch. a sports event. It finishes at 7.30 and she is nervous about travelling across London after dark. Ordinarily her dp would pick her up. She will be going up by train and event is apparentlt half hour "walk" from xanning town train station

She hasn't been to london on her own before. I have and i find it ok about dont like using buses alone. Its just because not used to it.

She has asked if dp can fetch her home. This is probably a four hour round trip as she luves in ramsgate kent. Half an hour further past us. That is assuming we dont hit traffic. Also petrol Shock

Is it really mean to tell her to grow a pairand get the train? That is my gut feeling but i feel mean

OP posts:
Original poster
LEMmingaround · 12/09/2014 13:31

What is canning town like as an area?

OP posts:
MrsPnut · 12/09/2014 13:32

I'd be telling her to grow a pair. Catching the bus in London is easy - the notices at bus stops tell you which stop to go to for the direction you want to travel and most buses have a next stop is sign on the lower deck.

bigTillyMint · 12/09/2014 13:33

It finishes at 7.30pm? That's not really late. Where is it and we can give you a good route/say if we think it's dodgy?

OutragedFromLeeds · 12/09/2014 13:35

It's London, not Baghdad! Tell her to sort herself out. If she's that terrified she can get a cab.

MerryMarigold · 12/09/2014 13:35

If it is a large event, there will be tons of people around anyway. She is more likely to be caught in a rush hour of people all going to the station. There is nowhere which is half an hour walk from Canning Town - so many DLR stops round there!

I would ask her to show you where everything is on google maps so you look really interested and helpful, and then tell her to grow a pair!

Finola1step · 12/09/2014 13:36

Canning Town ain't too great.

But, how big is the sporting event? If its a biggie, there will be lots of other people travelling on local transport.

It's unusual to be half an hours walk from a tube or bus stop if at a big event.

And she just needs to get to London Bridge or Charing Cross for the train home. Both stations are always busy from 6am until last train.

Finding it hard to see the problem.

MerryMarigold · 12/09/2014 13:37

I've just seen that it FINISHES at 7.30. FFS, London is only just starting at that time on a Sat night. Yes, it may be dodgy at 1.30am (though I did that plenty at 24 years old) but not 7.30pm.

NormHonal · 12/09/2014 13:37

At 24yo I had a flat not far from Canning Town and often caught the night bus home past midnight not that I would have admitted that to my parents.

Canning Town was a bit rough back then, but the whole area has had a bit of a lift since the Olympics. I travelled close to there during the Olympics late at night and wasn't concerned.

Perhaps she needs a bit of self-defence advice or advice on how to keep herself safe?

At 7.30pm there should still be lots of commuters around.

TheFantasticFixit · 12/09/2014 13:39

Oh dear. At 24, at only 7.30 at night, she needs to get a grip.

pootlebug · 12/09/2014 13:40

She's 24 ffs. I was considerably younger than that when i'd been halfway around the world on my own. She needs to get a grip. The streets and trains will be fairly busy but over the rush hour. If she doesn't like the bus get the tube. Even a taxi to the mainline station would be cheaper than your petrol.

RedToothBrush · 12/09/2014 13:40

How do 24 year olds who live in London cope?

16 or 17 yes pick up her up. 24? Seriously?

Its not even late if it finishes at 7.30pm!!!! And it will be busy after a sporting event. Its not as if its closing time or later.

She needs to grow up imho. At 24 I was going to the other side of the world. By myself.

LimburgseVlaai · 12/09/2014 13:40

Tell her to get the DLR to Stratford and then the HS1 to Faversham. Change at Faversham. And also to grow up.

DealForTheKids · 12/09/2014 13:42

Wow.

Yes she needs to grow a pair.

AliMonkey · 12/09/2014 13:44

I thought you were going to say she was eg 16/17 when I'd be a bit more sympathetic (but still probably tell her to get on with it at 7.30pm, but probably help out if 10/11pm). She really should be old enough to be able to do this now at any time of day or night, but really 7.30pm is not too late. As long as she plans it beforehand, sure she can get a bus. Or unless a very small sports event, likely to be lots of others walking to nearest tube as well. Or even a cab.

I suggest you are helpful in advising her on eg bus routes but don't go
and get her, no!

JeanetteDanielsBenziger · 12/09/2014 13:45

Will it be dark at 7.30pm in London?

bonkersLFDT20 · 12/09/2014 13:45

She doesn't need to "grow a pair" ie act like a man, she just needs to act like a mature woman, which at 24 she certainly is.

Why did she not think of this before?

I drove myself to my first job in Heidelberg at 21. I'd never done anything like that before.

ajandjjmum · 12/09/2014 13:45

DD lived at Royal Victoria (next stop on DLR from Canning Town) when she was 18. She coped. Canning Town isn't great, but absolutely won't be a problem that time of night. The DLR links are great, and the Jubilee Liine runs through there.

Where will she be that takes her 30 mins to walk there?

I'm a soft touch, but even I wouldn't do that running around! Smile

Original poster
LEMmingaround · 12/09/2014 13:45

Ooooh. Iwas ready to be told i was a bad parent. It is roller derby. Something she is interested in doing . So really? Big enough and tough enough. I'll help her plan a route.

OP posts:
Nancy66 · 12/09/2014 13:46

it will still be light at that time and it's a safe, busy area.

specialsubject · 12/09/2014 13:46

does it matter? The place has lights!

she's 24. Time she grew up. Tell her to get the train. Or not go to the event.

thecatneuterer · 12/09/2014 13:46

Canning Town is still rough. But I'm there all the time and often in the middle of the night- say 2 or 3am (it's where our rescue centre is based) and I've never felt in the least bit threatened. And 7.30 is practically daytime!

For heaven's sake. She needs to grow up I think.

iK8 · 12/09/2014 13:46

Blimey at 24 years old I was managing a business in London with £55 million pounds on deposit. We also had rioting at an embassy nearby and had to evacuate my team back to all corners of London.

At 22 years old I had employees missing in 7/7 (we found them after they walked across the whole of London to get to the office) and had to take phone calls from their worried family and then work out how to get everyone home in the transport black out afterwards.

From 22-24 years old I was responsible for the entire London staff and managing getting them home in the event of a terrorist attack or significant disaster (armed with a blanket, some bottled water and a satellite phone Hmm Grin).

So I think she can manage to get a bus or tube to Charing Cross to get home! It will do her good :)

Kittykatmacbill · 12/09/2014 13:46

No tell her to grow a pair. Help her route plan a way home (and a contingency route) Unless she is taking part in sports event and can't carry her equipment.

Optimist1 · 12/09/2014 13:47

YANBU!

MerryMarigold · 12/09/2014 13:47

Is the event at Excel? Probably half an hour from Canning Town, but lots of DLR stops nearer to it.

You could tell her to go on the cable car which is right next door. It would help in the resilience building exercise! I think she needs to get DLR from Stratford instead of the Jubilee Line to Canning Town.