not to pick dd from london

[LEMmingaround]

Dd1 is 24 and going up to london to watch. a sports event. It finishes at 7.30 and she is nervous about travelling across London after dark. Ordinarily her dp would pick her up. She will be going up by train and event is apparentlt half hour "walk" from xanning town train station

She hasn't been to london on her own before. I have and i find it ok about dont like using buses alone. Its just because not used to it.

She has asked if dp can fetch her home. This is probably a four hour round trip as she luves in ramsgate kent. Half an hour further past us. That is assuming we dont hit traffic. Also petrol

Is it really mean to tell her to grow a pairand get the train? That is my gut feeling but i feel mean

24?? I moved to London from the country when I was 18 for uni, I lived in South East London! I used to get the night bus, tubes, cabs, whatever at that age - If this sort of stuff daunts her, she should totally do it: she'll feel independent and well, capable, as she should at her age.

She is SIX YEARS an adult!

It's 7.30pm on a late summer evening in London, not 3.30am on the mean streets of Gotham FFS. As long as she's got a map on her phone, she'll be fine. There is practically nowhere in London that's a half-hour walk between stops, it's a 20 minute walk tops between tube stations, usually - and there are always buses between train stations. If it's a major event, there will be HUNDREDs of people around, too. Hardly deserted!

Not only should she get the cable car Merry but she should hang onto the outside James Bond-style! That'll learn her!

I agree she's being ridiculous. Tell her not to take anything valuable and not to flash her phone and she'll be totally fine.

If she's on the jubilee line it's easy to get to London bridge to pick up the Ramsgate train.

Where is the event exactly? I am struggling to believe it's half an hour walk from the tube station.

At 24, I would absolutely expect her to be able to use public transport. She can research it on the internet and presumably she had a mobile phone and the ability to find and use a cab if necessary. At 19 I travelled across the world on my own and then used public transport to cross a country where I could not speak the language and then came to London, found a job etc etc, all with no internet.

I'd be telling my son to grow up at 16 if he couldn't navigate public transport! Maybe I am extra mean then?

24??? Seriously how have you managed to produce a 24 year old who can't manage herself using public transport?

I am pretty fearless but the cable car makes me weep (from the inside!).

Canning Town is on the Jubilee I think, but it's a way from the Excel.

BUT you can get the cable to car to North Greenwich and that's on the Jubilee. Job done. Cable car included.

Goodness, at 24?

It would not have occurred to me after the age of 18, she needs to learn to be independent quickly!

On a more helpful note from me, if she has a smartphone she should consider downloading the app 'Citymapper' - it's my bible when in bits of London I don't know.

How is she with other stuff? I mean is she generally anxious? I don't think this is a 'normal' reaction for a 24 year old tbh.

Merry I know what you mean about the cable car. I've been on it, but there are a number of documents which point out what would happen in the event of a crash at London City Airport as it's directly built over the crash zone

Google maps and transport for London can give specifics if she puts in where she is going to and from. Amazed someone can get to 24 and not be able to get a bus or train. Life's basics surely?

Ok newham leisure centre is where the event is. Plaistow. E13?? ANYONE KNOW WHERE THIS IS? ILL GOOGLE MAP. oops. Didn't mean to shout

Don't Google Map, make your DD do it. She is being seriously drippy. And if she's worried, she should be looking for solutions, not expecting you to do it.

She is otherwise independent. She left home at 17 ffs!! But to live with her dp who chauffers her everywhere.

Will point her to google maps and a shop selling grips

Use the tfl journey planner. Put in start point and destination, voila.

I'm not sure you should even help her plan her route. I think it would do her good to work it out for herself.

I am utterly, utterly shocked that you think you are 'being mean' not to drive 4 hours to pick up a 24 year old at 7.30pm, or in fact at any time, in any part of the country!

at 24 she should be more independent, backing down you will only be called on again

get her to plan the trip before, or help her plan it there are great transport links around there

not the nicest of areas in London has improved in the last few years but certainly not the worse and we simply do not have areas that are so dangerous we can not walk about at anytime of day or night

YANBU, I started working in a bank in The City when I was 18, I had to commute alone morning and evening every day, and this was during the time when the IRA were blowing up buildings in London (including the one I was working in) - I only called my Dad, who worked in a different area of the City once, and that was when Liverpool Street closed due to snow and I didn't know how to get home, this was in the days prior to everyone having a mobile phone and access to the internet.

At 16, I was going shopping in the West End with friends, London isn't such a scary place and is very easy to travel around on public transport. If she is worried help her place a route using the TFL website, but she will be fine, honestly!

If she is someone who is likely to end up on a bus going the wrong way, suggest she fork out for a taxi.
My Mum got married in London having only lived there 10 days. She was shocked at all the locals (in-laws) telling her that in London you don't even have to book them. You can stand on a main road and flag one down
Tbh I found London public transport an absolute doddle after living in a large town where there were no maps and you only knew if you were getting off at the right stop if you had actually been there before.

She is 24 years old come on its half7 in the evening loads of people around yes get her to plan her route but picking her up no