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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To quit drinking

29 replies

bouncingbelle · 31/08/2014 04:40

I don't know where else to post this, I am an a**e on the drink. Tonight I have even sickened myself. I don't WANT to stop drinking but I have to, for health reasons. I just wanted affirmation that this is the right thing to do, I don't know how to do it but I need to. If I know I,ve had enough, it's enough isn't it???

OP posts:
MagpieMama · 31/08/2014 04:46

It sounds like you know it's time to quit. You've stated a couple of very good reasons. So yes, you're doing the right thing.

Original poster
bouncingbelle · 31/08/2014 04:55

I Want to be a social drinker, circumstance has made it so I shouldn't and - genetics? Nature? Life? - has made it so I can't. But I'm really scared, it feels like such a huge step.

OP posts:
TheSameBoat · 31/08/2014 05:06

OP are you so drunk that you've started two threads? If so you should def come off the sauce! Wink

How much do you drink normally? I think there is an NHS website, hold on.....

www.nhs.uk/Tools/Pages/Alcoholcalculator.aspx

Original poster
bouncingbelle · 31/08/2014 05:24

Not that drunk, but do have slightly dodgy Internet connection which has led to a double post :/

It's knowing that I NEED to stop as opposed to how often I drink, but knowing that I can't stop on my own. :(

OP posts:
MagpieMama · 31/08/2014 05:32

If you need help to stop, there's plenty of support out there. As they say, admitting you have a problem is the first step. Maybe book a GP appointment on Monday and go from there?
You're doing really well just to start talking about it, keep the momentum going!

MrsTerryPratchett · 31/08/2014 05:41

There's lots of support out there. In here, there is a lovely thread on Relationships for people. I think it's called the Battle Babes or some-such.

MrsTerryPratchett · 31/08/2014 05:43

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2137624-DRY-5

maddening · 31/08/2014 07:40

what arw your normal drinking patterns?

does your social group revolve around alcohol?

if you drive can you avoid drink so becomethe ddesignated driver if your friends are big drinkers and you still want to go out with them.

halfwildlingwoman · 31/08/2014 08:15

It's easier than you think. One day at a time. And you will feel so much better. I gave up for 9 months last year and I lost loads of weight and felt so much happier and healthier. I was the designated driver all the time and just had sparkling water with ice and lemon when out. No booze in the house (DP gave up as well to support me)
Good luck.

Bowlersarm · 31/08/2014 08:21

Hi OP. I'd suggest you stop drinking for a month and appraise it all after an alcohol free month. Take one day at a time. Be kind to yourself and eat healthily.

I take months off from alcohol periodically and starting today, I'm not drinking for September. So I'm here for support if you want to try it. Smile

Eeyore86 · 31/08/2014 08:25

You could contact your local alcohol service for advice, you don't have to be a dependant drinker in order to access some support, services are happy to give advice to anyone whatever their usual alcohol intake and you might find it helpful

Alsoflamingo · 31/08/2014 08:33

Hi OP. Can I recommend you find an AA meeting and go along? Just see if it makes sense to you and if you identify with people. It may seem like a scary, OTT thing to do, but I promise nothing awful happens - you don't get 'signed up' or anything. You can just pitch up ,sit in the back and listen. I strongly recommend it! Good luck. It's not such a scary step - more of a relief in a way .Promise!

fatlazymummy · 31/08/2014 08:33

OP I gave up a few years ago. No body told me to, I didn't have any health problems, I hadn't hit rock bottom or broken the law . I just knew I had to, I couldn't go on drinking, I'm not one of those people who can just enjoy social drinking.
It sounds to me as if you are at that stage. You know drinking isn't good for you, it doesn't enhance your life and things will get worse.
I just stopped by myself. It was rough for a few days because I did have quite strong cravings but I was over them after a week or so and then I felt fine. However, if you feel you need help then go and see your GP. Remember, alcohol withdrawal can be dangerous, depending on your level of dependency.
Most importantly, I can tell you life is fine without drinking (in fact it's better IMO). In our society we get given the message that drinking is fun and our lives aren't complete without it but that isn't true.
Best of luck.

FunkyBoldRibena · 31/08/2014 08:41

If you need help to stop; then you definitely need to stop.

I don't drink - possibly less than a litre a year. I do however make loads of wine. It is possible to have a healthy relationship with alcohol and not abuse it.

Plus having a clear head 365 mornings a year is a wonderful thing.

MintyChops · 31/08/2014 08:55

Sounds like you should give it a go. I found the Jason Vale book really helpful. It was a LOT easier than I thought it would be, I stopped for 4 months last year, still went to lots of parties, dinners, etc and now drink far less than I did before. Also the Soberistas website was great (although, irritatingly, they now charge a subscription fee).

Original poster
bouncingbelle · 31/08/2014 13:27

Thanks all. I definately want to do this. I,d say I am a classic binge drinker, I don't needto drink every day, but when I do I literally have no limits and the idea of a future without alcohol actually scares me.

I just don't want to wake up again feeling physically and emotionally the way I do today. People have actually started to comment on my drinking habits, some in a concerned way, some In a laughing type way.i don't want to be a laughing stock all the time.

I,ll try for a month as someone suggested to see if i can do this alone, but there's always an excuse, you know? A night out, a wedding.... September is only 30 days, I'm going to try.

OP posts:
merrydebs · 31/08/2014 13:49

Well done Bouncing, bit of a binge drinker too, you've spurred me on to try a dry September ! Good luck.

XiCi · 31/08/2014 14:02

How much are you drinking? I only ask because it can be very dangerous to just stop drinking if you are an alcoholic. You should really see your GP first. I think the general advice it to start to cut down rather than just stop, leading up to cutting it out completely. Your GP can also prescribe medication to help.There's a lot of support out there for you.

GreenPetal94 · 31/08/2014 14:05

My colleague did this successfully and I watched her with admiration. I believe she stopped dead (on doctor's advice).

She found it useful to buy alcohol-free beer. I found this interesting, it made her feel better as she still got the taste of beer. She'll still select a pub on the basis of their alcohol-free beer selections and I'll go along with her to that one!

maddening · 31/08/2014 16:15

Drive to and from weddings and nights out - seriously it stops the offer of booze dead - I became the driver for my heavy drinking friends only because I couldn't trust them not to drink and drive and we went far afield so I didn't want to get stuck a hundred miles from home - I actually got used to going out without drinking (though I didn't have a drink problem ) - it's quite liberating in fact. I drink occasionally now post ds (I stopped fully for 4 years to ttc and during pg and bf but I am fine with pr without booze :)

Original poster
bouncingbelle · 31/08/2014 18:47

I really don't have a physical dependency to alcohol, it's purely psychological. Last night I didn't drink to what I consider to be excess - I had half a litre of vodka, a few glasses of wine, a few shots and a few bottles of alcopop type stuff. That's fairly typical for me. Is it a lot? I don't know.

I do know I hope to get pregnant soon and I personally would want to completely abstain from alcohol during a pregnancy, but right now that seems impossible.

OP posts:
KellyElly · 31/08/2014 18:53

Hi OP. I binge drink and what you are saying you drank really is a lot. That would floor me for sure. I'm at the point where I will drink two bottles of wine if I'm having a binge. It's like I have to keep going until I go to bed. I also need to address my binge drinking so know where you're coming from Smile

XiCi · 31/08/2014 19:16

OP, that is a massive amount for one evening and I say that as someone that's had a good few binges in my time. If you really don't know that that is a harmful amount of alcohol to drink I would visit your GP for advice.

gellicleCat · 31/08/2014 19:17

not at all. hic