to think that 'mini-wife' is problematic for exactly the same reasons that 'jailbait' is problematic?

[ArsenicyOldFace]

In that it transfers responsibility from adult men onto female children?

Thankfully one doesn't hear the word 'jailbait' much any more; society has moved on and we now understand the process of grooming etc

Where exactly has been agreed that this is a lovely chat without stepmothers saying their piece? You just made that up.

I think it's common knowledge that there's a Them and Us with that board and that's why it's useful to post elsewhere because all threads there degenerate into a bunfight and the insularity there does not always lend itself to sensible debate. However I am sure everyone is welcome to contribute on this thread. wakey has prolifically and it's been a sensible debate up until now.

Fine i'll leave you to it.

I've been immediately jumped upon by three of you over what was intended as a 'let's keep it pleasant' kind of post. I've only just joined this thread, I've read the others, I have no beef with anyone.

It's quite clear who's calling the shots on who's allowed to comment on this thread.

Thanks for nothing.

Wow! arsenic when did I ever say you had to leave the parenting boards ? I didn't. I said you were afforded peace (with the help of HQ) on this thread

And that you hoped I would do the same for the Step forum.

Which you were just deleted for.

My OP is very clearly not a vent, it is an explanation of why 'MW' is a problematic term.

Not everything comes from a place of anger and poor self-control Softly

Everyone can comment as long as there are no personal attacks and posters keep to the topic.

To come on and accuse Arse of being goady was out of line and you were pulled up o it. Rightly so.

I am sorry you didn't stay to add to the discussion and put your thoughts about the MWS.

I've been immediately jumped upon by three of you over what was intended as a 'let's keep it pleasant' kind of post

You mean the one that starts;

Arsenicy , you are coming across as a bit goady now.

Interesting post Olga I will make and read it again properly

Absolute nonsense zoe

The fact my earlier post was removed is pathetic! In no way was it attacking!

I wonder arsenic as you have had peace on this thread will you afford the SP boards the same?

In what way way is that attackng. Highlighting that arsenic has had chance to discuss her topic in peace. Maybe she can let others do the same?

Think your getting a little trigger happy HQ

Okay I have to comment once more as you are portraying yourself as so very innocent, - it was this comment in particular which came across as goading:-

It seems that most people agree, once you leave the step-parenting board. Which is nice smile

pa smiley or not, you know that this thread will not have gone unnoticed by the SMs you disagreed with, and they have had the decency at least to leave this discussion alone.

Once again, I'm not saying I agree with the terms being used at all.

I said that in my earlier post, and I said you had every right to have this discussion, and I said 'coming across' not accusing.

But I expect my post will be selectively picked apart again.

biscuit and hmm face all you like - I won't post again, you're all a bit hostile.

I wonder arsenic as you have had peace on this thread will you afford the SP boards the same?*

Exactly what crimes against the peace have I supposedly committed on the SP board, anyway, softly?

I didn't ask anyone to stay away from this thread. A grown up discussion on neutral ground with anyone who wanted to join in would have been most welcome.

It might have cleared the air.

It's not attacking no but it's hardly pleasant to tell people where they should post and imply they'll be making trouble if they post in a particular place.

You were pissed of at something , you came on here to discuss, complain ..to 'vent'.... Posters let you get on with it. Does that sound familiar?

That's not what this thread is about at all softly, it's a discussion, not a vent. Lots of people agree that the term MW or MWS should not be used and we are discussing why.

It applies to all the sm you have been pulling to pieces on here all day also

No SM's have been 'pulled to pieces', we are talking about general phrases which are often seen on mn, putting blame for adult's actions squarely on the shoulders of the child. And we think that should be challenged. It's not personal to any particular poster.

Zoe I can see what you mean about that sentence - that it might have sounded PA. It wasn't meant that way.

But you didn't say that (the pointer would have been appreciated). You posted calling me goady, after a long peacable thread and immediately after Softly had told me to stay away from the Step-Parenting board.

You THEN claimed that your accusation of goadiness was an attempt at peacemaking. Which just sounded laughable. Peacemaking isn't usually attempted by name-calling. Ask Kofi.

threads getting deleted because they may imply that a poster may cause trouble and it's not pleasant.... - what forum am I on????

Seems like posters can dish it out but not it them selfs, implied or not.

I've been immediately jumped upon by three of you over what was intended as a 'let's keep it pleasant' kind of post. I've only just joined this thread, I've read the others, I have no beef with anyone.

Why suddenly join a thread just to say 'keep it pleasant?' Why not add something, join the discussion or even cut and past the parts that you consider unpleasant and say why so that we can discuss it.

Anyone is welcome to join the debate. But, well, let's keep it pleasant shall we.

No SM's have been 'pulled to pieces', we are talking about general phrases which are often seen on mn, putting blame for adult's actions squarely on the shoulders of the child. And we think that should be challenged. It's not personal to any particular poster.

Very true faire. It is a (another) baffling assertion from softly that this about any specific SM. It really isn't.

arsenicy I didnt at any point tell you to stay away from the parenting board. It's not my fault if your looking for slights in posters. Absolute madness!

Highlighting that arsenic has had chance to discuss her topic in peace. Maybe she can let others do the same?

How has she been left to discuss her topic in peace? Are you saying that you expected posters to come onto this discussion thread and try to stop her discussing it in peace?

It doesn't make sense softly. It sounds like you are saying this thread is being deliberately left alone by some posters who would otherwise disrupt it. Is that what you are saying?

you know that this thread will not have gone unnoticed by the SMs you disagreed with, and they have had the decency at least to leave this discussion alone

They don't have to leave it alone, they are more than welcome to share their views. As long as everyone sticks to the talk guidelines. Why does it have to be a problem to discuss the term MW or MWS?

Yes you did Softly, or at least expressed the hope.

And you were deleted for it and now you are trying to hide behind the deletion.

Tedious.

It doesn't make sense softly. It sounds like you are saying this thread is being deliberately left alone by some posters who would otherwise disrupt it. Is that what you are saying?

Quite.

Perhaps I'm supposed to say thanks

"SM pulled to pieces". Where?

I don't arsenic is the one looking for slights.

If there are posters out there who wish to come on and discuss the issues on this thread then I can't understand why they don't? It's open to all not just SP, what's the problem with that?

No I didn't . Stop telling lies. I've reposed what I put and it in to context.

Stop telling lies

Reported

Report away !