To wonder how people survive years of juggling childcare and work?

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DC (3) is in nursery full time and both DP and I work full time and I'm constantly chasing my tail. DC hates waking up, is overtired in the evening and moans when dropped off at nursery (but loves it during the day). On a week day, a simple 5 minute delay can totally mess up the routine. I'm lucky to have a good, flexible employer but every day is non-stop and I'm turning into a scatter brain!

Given that DP and I want more DC's, I was wondering how on earth other people survive the sleepless nights and tiredness for years on end!

Iggi mine also doesn't need much sleep - the idea of having to wake her makes me laugh! she only sleeps ten hours at night (and wakes frequently) - knackering but on the plus side I get to see plenty of her either side of work. swings and roundabouts

2 DC - I think the best solution is a nanny, if you can. it may even cost less than two in nursery and it's SO much easier. We haven't got to 2 DC yet though so we'll see! please god let number 2 be a sleeper.

We have 3 under 5 and both work full time.

Success=
Live in childcare (au pairs v cheap)
Cleaner
Paid£10ph nursery staff for a few hr in aft a few days per week in school hols at our house
Total 50/50 teamwork

Still knakxering if anyone gets I'll!

Also we both wfh 1 day and 2day p week

Haven't read much of the thread but wanted to reply and share some tactics from an inherently lazy/tired person at heart :)

I have a 2 year old and 3.5 month old. I work full time - have done since each was 11 weeks. I am knackered as up a couple of times a night still, but its manageable - I just do everything I can really really quickly so I get some chill time. So I'll have a plan in my head of what needs to be done when (very tight routine - evenings are regimented), and I'll map it out so it gets done really time efficiently. i.e. never leaving a room empty handed - doing upstairs jobs, then downstairs. Turning chores with my 2 year old into a fun game - i.e racing each other to the bathroom for teeth clean, high fives when its done.I find it a challenge - as in a competition - and feel pleased when its panned out! (Im so fucking sad!) I layout clothes and nappies for bathtime / morning ahead of time. My DP is awesome too, we 50:50 all chores.

Oh and I massively agree with lowering standards which I know gets peddled here all the time. 50% of the week my house looks.... well.... dirty - but always tidy due to the speed methods. I moan at my DP when he's not moving quick enough - its a running joke :D

Can your little one go to bed earlier to make morning wake ups less of a chore? Could you afford a nanny if/when DC2 comes along? That would make life loads easier as they come to you. I also think Nursery is exhausting for little ones. Could you use a mix of childminder and nursery? Childminder home setting is much less tiring as less children/noise & possibly more flexible.

Can you work at home for 1 or 2 days a week? That's amazing for catching up - loading washing machine, not having to get 'ready' etc.

I don't have a cleaner, but I do have a dog walker. If I didn't have a dog I'd probably have a cleaner....Infact I'd not need a cleaner so much if I didn't have a dog anyhow!

I send the working from home if you can. I try to avoid all meetings if I can - not always easy. If I compare working as an employee to owning a business (now) the working for myself is much easier but also that's because I earn a lot more money and I am older and more experience. I had babies at both stages (teenagers now). Even now the difference between a day when I have to go out to a meeting - like a couple of days ago - getting a bag ready, changing into special clothes, looking smart, anticipating all you'll need for the day, allowing travelling time and time for the trains to be late meeting, getting home when so much of what I do in fact can be done by email and telephone.... it is why now I reject meetings all the time. it's wonderful but that depends on your job. If you're a surgeon you cannot exactly do that at a distance and if you're a barrister with a court date again you have to be present.

What I tell my children 3 of whom have graduated now is pick work you will enjoy for the rest of your life, ideally also pick something very well paid and well regarded and also crucially something where ultimately if you so choose you might own rather than just work for someone else as most of the people in the UK including women who have had very big financial success are those who own the companies, not those working for others.

The most important element for most women though is feminism, refusing even for a day to tolerate a sexist man who does not do half his share at home. Those of us who manage on this thread have/had that. Those who find it hard don't.

Im not scatter brained.we are organised.we work ft.it is what it is,busy

Greengrow - completely agree! I reject all but important travel and meetings for work - prep is ridiculous. I also mange ok as I'm apparently a feminist! Who knew ;)

The meeting issue can just be a personality issue. Plenty of people love meetings. I just never have. I like time alone and as I own the business I can work in ways mostly I prefer. It is important women know that for many careers loads of networking can be a key to success. I just choose to do none of it. Although to be fair one reason I am fairly well known is I have been prepared to get a 5.30am taxi to a TV studio to talk about my area for no fee - apparently women tend not to agree to those things so are on TV and radio much less whereas men will jump at the chance so I suppose we do need to make some efforts and I have had more than my fair share of business trips to Iran, Nigeria and the like despite my efforts to avoid them.

I remember trying to work out how to book child care for 4.30am to school start even with their school's before school club where if I needed I could drop them at 7.30am - not the easiest of slots to cover - when I had an early flight.