To hate charity bag packers at supermarket checkout

[DameEdnasBridesmaid]

I want to pack my own bag.
I want to choose who I give my charity donations to not feel obliged.
I think they are a bloody nuisance.

Sorry LRD I have read the thread but I'm on my phone which isn't ideal.

Can you summarise what might be the issue with a polite no? I'm really a bit taken aback here!

I never realised all the seething animosity I must have been on the receiving end of when I went bag packing

s88 no Tesco Rochdale this is morning. Adult bag packer, no idea what charity it was. She packed my bags, didn't ask, didn't pack them like I would but I can live with it. I gave a donation.

Just object to being put in that position by Tesco. Like I said in my OP, I want to pack my own bags and give to the charities of my choice or the groups that my DC's are involved with.

The just say no theory doesn't wash with me, when children or adults are giving up their time standing at checkouts to raise money.

plinth... You're being insufferably rude. "Anally retentive? Some people have issues and posters such as Humble* have explained how these interventions and interference with their shopping makes them feel.

Miserable -v- thick-witted. I know which I prefer.

Ah, no worries.

I don't get the issue with a polite no either!

I would have thought it would be fine, but apparently, since most people (?) can afford a penny at least, we should all just donate anyway, or else we're stingy miseries. That was the gist of it.

Oh, and there was also a claim that if we say no, we're blighting the hopes of idealistic children who think they're doing a good thing, and contributing to the numbers of disaffected youth everywhere.

Lying "anally retentive" was a phrase used by a poster up thread to describe why she doesn't like someone packing her bags.

If you like to pack your own bags for whatever reason just say no! What exactly is the issue here?

ilovesooty... If you don't feel comfortable posting about your organisation on this thread, would you be able to PM me some details about it? I really am interested in knowing about it so totally solicited. :)

Thank you too catsizeI don't think we've everset up for online donation as we are small and local.

I'm very worried about next year's funding as it's such a hard prcess but I'm very proud of what we do.I'd be happy to tell the name via PM but I'd hate anyone to think I was touting on here.We do have a web site.

Just wanted to defend our bag packing really. I'd not want anyone to be offended by us!

School residential!

That makes my blood boil; bad enough blooming scouts, but schools should not be planning the kind of residential that their pupils families cannot afford and then expecting this sort of fundraising to subsidise it.

Believe me, I said enough in the privacy of my home about the cost but lots of schools do a residential towards the end of primary, and we are in an area where lots of parents can't afford it. The PTA helps if they can, the community council help, and the children do coffee mornings and soup kitchens to raise money. How is it any less worthwhile than a scout camp? Yes, less worthwhile than, for example, a cancer charity - but they weren't pushy about it, they were fine with people saying no, and they raised some cash.

Why do the big supermarkets do this? What's in it for them?

X posted Lying

I'd be happy to do that when I'm back at my PC. Thank you.

Ah thanks LRD. The Mumsnet philosophy in action

So if there is a demon bag packer at your checkout, intent on destroying your day by trying to help you perform a mundane task and improve the lives of the sick and the lame at the same time you can:

1. Say thank you, let them pack your bag, and donate
2. Say thank you, explain that you like to pack your own bag, and donate
3. As 2, but don't donate.

Or, if you are on mn

1. Say thank you, perform any of 1,2 and/or 3, then seethe silently all the way across the car park.

Right-o

My DSS and a few of the girls and boys at their Sea Cadet unit do bag packing in the local Tesco to raise funds for the Unit. Sea cadets keeps young people gainfully occupied in their community and gives them a sense of pride. It isnt a cynical ploy to 'wheel them out' to do the bag packing, they are the Cadets so they take their responsibility seriously to raise funds, 10p, 50p, £1 whatever people wanted to give.

People always remark what lovely polite young people they are. We are lucky to live in a close knit community where people support each other. Nobody to our knowledge felt anything negative.

Maybe if people took this approach a bit more, our country would become more optimistic, rather than scowling at 14 year olds who get up early on a Saturday and Sunday rather than festering in their pit.

Just saying....

Wombles the supermarkets have to show that they benefit the local area and all large firms now must have a "corporate social responsibility" policy which covers things like doing 'owt for charity.

womble I think our local supermarket just is happy to help us. I don't suppose it does them any harm.

plinth... That poster, whoever it was, was describing herself. You're referring to 'anally retentive packers' en bloc. Basically, anybody who identifies themselves in your aggressive post of 21:08.

Have a look at what you're actually writing because it's really rude. Yours isn't the only narky post but note that it's only some of the 'pro bag packers' who namecall those who'd rather not participate as 'miserable', etc.

BTW... I shouldn't have to give a polite 'no' or any other kind. I want to go about my day without myself or my shopping being molested. If I'm interested in your charity/good works, I will contribute to it without prompting. If you're having to prompt then that should tell you what public perception of your activity really is.

I'm absolutely of the opinion that only charities belong at supermarkets and there's a petition been submitted locally about that because the number and frequency of non-charity bag packers is phenomenal here.

I'd like to know how exactly posters think charities should earn money if they are banned from shaking a tin, bag packing and the like.

It's all very well saying you give to the charities you want to support, but there are a ton of great small local charities out there who have a constant struggle to keep their heads above water, and who don't have the money for massive advertisements and campaigns a la breast cancer or whatever.

The sad fact is most people do not give to charity unless the opportunity is dangled in front of their noses. And the pool of people who actually give their time, to bag pack or whatever, is absolutely minuscule.

I thought Cameron had persuaded all of us to become part of the "Big Society" Evidently not He just cut funding every which way and hoped volunteers would step into the gap.

Lying I have previously said that I absolutely agree with you wrt non charity bag packers.

Lying, if you came along to our Tesco, my DS would always ask you first if you would like some help packing, he wouldn't just go ahead and do it, or feel upset if you want to pack your own. Good training from the Head Honcho

I love bag packers and am that woman who asks a thousand questions about their work, holding up all the other shoppers.

They have given their time up to cheerfully offer to pack your shopping, for that I am grateful as I usually lose the plot trying to pack, pay and remember everything. They tend to be small, local charities so I don't mind giving a little. It must be quite soulless for them sometimes.

plinth... If yours is also a charity then I'm not one of your 'miserable' posters because I have no problem donating to charity, none whatsoever.

Everybody else can fend/fund for themselves.

I imagine it must be very tough for the smaller, less well-known brand charities to achieve funding. I don't know what the answer is to that? I was discussing this with a colleague as I do some very minor work with some smaller charities and they complain bitterly that the larger charities tend to umbrella the majority of the donations but none of it filters downwards to the smaller ones and so much of the money is eaten up in admin costs which may/may not be entirely necessary.

As you're a charity, you can happily bag pack in my local supermarkets and I think you'd be well supported with donations from me and many others... but don't touch my shopping.

I'm glad we got there in the end... and not a misery guts in sight... :)

It is worse than the scouts, because not all children have to be in the scouts and take part in their activities.

Schools on the other hand have a captive audience.

I admit though; that it is a fine distinction and I object to both harassing me at the checkout.

Aw Lying I've got a fuzzy feeling

There's a Middle East analogy in here somewhere.....

My DS's school picked the WWF as their charity of the year last year.

That slightly narked me - all year collecting money for the fricking pandas when there's a load of excellent charities local to us going to the wall

I do like pandas but I just think if they were better at sex they would never have got into this predicament

daisychain... I'm also nice to the children who are bag-packing. I also always donate, I keep change especially for the purpose, even if it's something that I don't think of as 'charity', if I have it, I'll give it but my bigger donations are strictly for charity.

I think MN mums probably do a awful lot to coach their children in the art of packing. I'd possibly decline (nicely) your son's invitation to help packing unless he looked super-keen. Beware though my penchant for supermarket bras in giant size... they're not so easy to pack as they appear...

If someone touches your shopping then slap their hands with a French Stick until they stop. Ask loudly for the items they touched to be replaced "as some weirdo keeps messing with them". Only a very ignorant person would interfere without your permission so they deserve to be embarrassed.

I'd like to know how exactly posters think charities should earn money if they are banned from shaking a tin, bag packing and the like.

I see no reason why a charity should get any money from the public at all.

If a charity is for something trivial: "Donate to put up a statue of Elvis outside the chip shop" or "Save the Smelly Spotted Toad' then it should not be bothering the general public with it. I'm sure the true Elvis (or toad) fans will come to them directly and they can put up a sign at the next Toad convention.

If it's for something vital then it should be paid for by tax payers directly and not become a means for a third party to make a profit.

That goes especially for religious charities who take your money and then give it to someone else on condition that they cooperate with their agenda.