To think there's no such thing as a low sex drive?

[Stressedoutandworriedaboutever]

There's just bad sex?

Obviously not including issues of having young kids/work making you tireder, surely if you are having good sex, you are going to want it all the time?

With my ex I barely wanted sex, and told myself it was just that I had a low sex drive. Now with my new partner I realise it was just that the sex with my ex wasn't very good.

Aibu to think that naturally low sex drives don't exist, it's just bad sex or bad relationships?

Meh, not met.

And goady, not good. Bloody tablet.

I have had great relationships with crap sex. I have had crap relationships with great sex. I had one relationship with mind blowing sex but loooooots of other problems. In all of these relationships I happily had sex (well, less happily when it was crap obviously) if it was on offer but I never sought it out. I would say that's a low sex drive. And I can orgasm in a few different ways, can and do have multiple orgasms, comfortable with my own body etc.

I disagree with your premise. Wholeheartedly.

You people who have no underlying reason. But often you don't know at the time that you have an underlying reason it only comes out when you hit rock bottom for other reasons.
With my Ex my sex drive drop several times in our relationship firstly new baby and back to work early to very physically demanding and pyschologically demanding role (driven by Ex I may add).
Second development of autoimmune disease I was only once I got some physical signs a year later that I realised this had been the cause.
Then a combination of carpal tunnel syndrome that I knew about preventing sleep and pernicious anaemia and coeliac disease that it took over a year to be diagnosed with, but by then Ex had taken him self off to someone who would shag him more often.
I'm sure if I had a partner recently it would have been the same as one of my old favourite autoimmune conditions has kicked in, but again it hits rock bottom to realise what the problem is.
The best sex I have ever had was one nights stands all the long term partners I have picked have been very, very vanilla and had no imagination maybe that contributes too.

You're a dafty.

No wonder the daily mail thrives when people like the OP think their experience= robust clinical research

Do come back OP, I'm sure we'd all be keen to hear what other medical conditions you don't believe in just because you've not experienced them yourself

I think we all know the purpose of your OP was to brag about the great sex you are having at the moment, give it time

Can I go against the tide and say that I kind of see what OP means?

Of course there are different levels of sex drive but I secretly nurse the feeling that women and men have similar sex drives but that there's lots of societal crap that puts women off having sex more than men.

Just putting it out there

Is having a low sex drive a medical condition? Not trying to goad with this, just genuinely curious

The point that the OP makes might have some credence to an extent, as does the one you make. But in matters to do with sex and relationships, as with many other subjective issues, I think it's always better to say, 'is it possible that in some cases...' rather than setting it out as a foregone conclusion which applies across the board to every situation.

Really???! Of course there is! Unless you are married to David Beckham or Robert Dpwney jr.

What a load of old crap!

There is no such thing as not liking sweet things - you just haven't had the right dessert yet.

There is no such thing as not liking curry - you just haven't tasted the right curry yet.

There is no such thing as not liking swimming - you haven't been in the right pool/sea yet.

There is no such thing as not liking house music - you haven't heard the rights songs yet.

People like and desire different things. Ignorant post.

Urgh have a , your thread sounds like a low budget research exercise tbh. Do you work on the Wright Stuff?

This is silly.

This might help you OP.

I think op that what you actually mean is that you think often people who say they have a low sex drive just have the wrong set of circumstances at that time and could have a higher sex drive given the right circumstances. This would be reasonable.

Where you are going wrong is by asserting that because some people who have bad sex have a low sex drive it follows that all people who have a low sex drive are having bad sex.

That's false logic that is... I think. Well whatever it is, it's wrong.

I think posters are being surprisingly harsh to the op. I struggle with a lsd and its nice to even have the debate opened up, which ime I don't have conversations about it in real life. I feel constantly guilty about it and like a failure as a partner, frankly.

Doesn't someone saying it doesn't exist make you feel worse?

Tj

That's.

Bloody phone. Not really because of course it exists. I know that doesn't sound very logical, I'm just relieved to read about others experiences

When you are with someone for a long time desire does dwindle. It happens do everyone. It does not necessarily mean the sex is bad. You can have great sex but in long term relationships you don't have the intense desire like you do at the start.
You are currently in that honeymoon desire phase with your new partner but as time goes on it will change. This is why people have affairs a lot of the time. They think it means they fancy that new person so much more but it's not it's just because it is new and exciting. Think back to the start of any of your relationships, it's hot to begin with but that changes. What you gain is love, companionship, intimacy and you can still enjoy good sex it just takes effort as you don't have sudden desire.

Bless you OP. How old are you?

Not trying to be goady or anything, just curious.

It's because of bad sex???
So, when I find myself not wanting sex should I tell dh I don't want sex because he's shit in bed then go out and shag loads of different men until I find good sex then I'll want it all the time?

I think it is true in some cases op. I dont see anything wrong in what you are saying.