Just sent wrong text to playdate horrors mother

[Fanfeckintastic]

Oh please help me I'm mortified!! I've just had a play date from HELL and to I went to text my best friend (who would find it hilarious) all about it, outlined everything horrible that he did but I sent it to the little boys mother. I feel like crying.

Is there anyway out of this, I used him name and I ended with "never to return again"

No I'm fine with you disagreeing. I just think you and nanny are funny, popping up every 30 posts to bleat and noone taking the bait. You're just repeating yourselves. It's a bit sad and I'm feeling mean (sanctimoniousness does that to me) so I thought I'd poke fun.

Carry on!

Montysma

I can't help thinking there's this real denial about your own dc at other people's houses though. I think pretty much every one I had round aged 6 was a bit of a nightmare - spaghetti bowls turned upside down on heads, fighting, taking all their clothes off. It's just a given really that you keep it to yourself. They all pretty much are fine by the time they're 8. So it's a bit shortsighted to burn bridges when they're six or so. I think the most challenging of my dd's friends (so much so that we only invited her round at weekends when there were two of us to supervise) turned out to be the funniest, most driven dc my dc has as a friend now. Statistically I knew mine must've been a nightmare too, because everyone we had round was at a certain age.

the op is a regular, and has been for a couple of years. Mabey she just wanted an early night after todays' events.

If it's not the first or even second time he's behaved badly on a playdate, why did you have him around for a third? Did his mum ask you to have one and why?

Op, this is so easy to do, I agree that you're brave and fab for openly owning up to it and trying to make amends - this is exactly what we ask kids to do if they make mistakes. Hope all went well, and that in time you and the other mum can giggle.

Oh I'm so glad I went BEFORE reading some of the replies as it would most definitely have put me off going.

She was honestly way more understanding than a lot of people on this thread! She's an absolutely lovely woman, so witty and I'm so glad I went around, we ended up having a great evening!

She wasn't angry but was quite upset and a bit "Oh my god, is he really that bad!?" Which I felt terrible about (have also just caught up on the last few pages so despite our lovely evening I'm burning with shame yet again) Her MIL minds him quite a lot and she had been having issues with MIL complaining about him wrecking the place and throwing toddler like tantrums but she had thought MIL was just out to cause trouble for the most part so she was surprisingly relieved to know it's definitely not just MIL stirring.

What really got me was she was saying that the wording of the text (she didn't seem to find it malicious thank goodness) reminded her that she didn't really have any close friends she could talk so "openly" with and it made her miss that too, but she said if the tables had been turned, her sister would undoubtedly have received an identical text! This was so good to hear!

We ended up talking about everything and anything and both opened up hugely about our insecurities as mother's and areas we feel are a struggle. It was so refreshing!
We're going to a play centre next week and I'm really looking forward to it. I kind of feel as if I've made a new friend tonight, I'm a bit teary eyed now with a mixture of relief, embarrassment and guilt.

So many times you lot have set me straight on things (potential dates, holidaying alone with my little girl, being unreasonable about ex bringing DD to McDonalds, being freaked out about his new girlfriend meeting DD among MANY things) thanks so much again for coming through! I know it sounds really obvious but it's very easy to forget it's another human being posting when your piling in slating them, I'll definitely watch that myself from now on!

[Thanks]

Yay! Op, fantastic!

Ah well done and glad you got it sorted. That was a brave thing to do.

Glad it all worked out. :)

She sounds like a lovely person. It takes a good nature to read an upfront text like that about your own child and reach out to the other person rather than hating their guts. Tell her from me that she most definitely can't be failing as a mother if she's able to stand back from her son's behavior and think clearly about it rather than assuming her little angel can do no wrong, as many bad / weak parents do.

What a nice ending. Well fucking done op!!!

(I made it sweary cos I know you likes the swears )

Yay, I was hoping for that ending x

Did you or your son ask for the playdate though OP? If not and if her MiL was minding him and complaining about his behaviour, it's possible that child's mum has been looking for other people to palm him off to instead and was fully aware of the behavioural issues.

Awwww! I love this.

What a brilliant outcome

What a lovely thread. I'm so glad you went round to see her Fanfeck you both sound really nice, level headed women capable of talking through an issue calmly and sensibly without judgement or hysteria. Mixing socially with other mums and children would be a lot less fraught if everyone was like you two!

Well done both of you. A happy ending! I think you both sound great. You can send me a nasty text any time! A big relief, congratulations for handling a tricky scenario so well.

Aaaw! How warm and fuzzy! Love it

That's brilliant fanfeck! Thanks for the update!

I love a happy ending

Lovely ending.

minishimmi are you serious?

Great update OP

What a fantastic ending - and total respect to you OP for facing upto your mistake and "putting it right".