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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not choose holidays based on what there is for the kids to do?

160 replies

MrsWinnibago · 15/07/2014 13:29

It's struck me that I'm the only one of all the families I've talked to recently that doesn't choose holidays based on what there is for the kids to do.

I've just never even considered it! Mine like the beach, the countryside, shops and walks as well as walking round castles and towns they've not been to before.

They like shops and galleries and they just seem to enjoy new places.

I was talking to my sister and she was suggesting a particular resort as it has a good kid's club and other things that would appeal to most kids she said.

She went on to say that I'm selfish as I never book anywhere like that. Am I?

Our kids are similar in age...between 6 and 10.

OP posts:
SaveTheMockingBird · 15/07/2014 17:38

Same here IamSlave

Also I think resorts tend to be expensive. Our lyon holiday flights and apartment costs under a grand. Thatis for nearly 2 weeks..bargain I think.

NickiFury · 15/07/2014 17:42

I book all my own holidays too. It's cheaper. I have never used a travel company. Sometimes though I book a resort for us and the kids go to kids club, we also leave the resort too! Imagine!

I'm not sure why the sneeriness towards "resorts". You obviously have a very restrictive idea of what they entail. I'm not sure how you know this if you've never been to one though.

BeanyIsPregnant · 15/07/2014 17:48

I'm 22 and my brother 19.. We have never been on a 'kids' holiday, or even really see a holiday club.. So I guess we are your children in years to come! We always loved our holidays and I feel like I've enjoyed my childhood holidays more than dp, he's only been on a 'kids holiday club' holiday, and said he hated every min of it... On the flip side his sister loved them... Totally depends on the child/ family.

Yanbu by picking the holiday you want

jamtoast12 · 15/07/2014 18:21

The is no right or wrong and adults can have a preference and choose as they wish and kids will likely enjoy it but if kids have never experienced the family resort type holiday then you can't really decide which they would prefer.

Most people know what type of activities their kids like so base their holidays on that e.g my kids would be bored stiff with only a park or beach on offer (we go the park after school most days and live 15 mins from a beach), plus they (and me) have no interest in castles, museums and galleries - I seriously can't think of nothing worse.

Our holidays are up early for full on fun days around a pool, playing on the beach, staying up late, hiring pedaloes, going on boat trips etc, holidaying with large groups of friends and their kids etc.

we do have additional weekends away in the UK where we have days out, (largely due to the weather) but the kids would definitely not consider that a holiday and neither would I.

I'm not trying to criticise peoples interests in any way but there's no way any of us can answer your query fully as we don't know your kids. If your kids didn't enjoy your activities and moaned about going etc then I would say you need to consider their needs more but they enjoy it so there's no problem :)

ChickenFajitaAndNachos · 15/07/2014 19:07

I choose where we are going, buy the guide book Top 10 things to do there for kids/ to do with nature/ best views etc and let them pick something each. That seems to work well and I get to go where I want.

GermyElephant · 15/07/2014 19:22

Mine are both under 4. We went self catering and chose accommodation with outdoor play equipment for the children.

We did stuff most days, but it was things like a trip on a steam train and a visit to an aquarium.

Kids clubs just sound awful. I want to spend time with my children on holiday. But mine are young yet so I may change my view when they get older.

Happy36 · 15/07/2014 19:25

We are like you and our children appear to love their holidays. They always get some lurid looking ice-cream or drink at some point during the week and that tends to be the "highlight" they remember. (Both of them refer to Rome, and in fact Italy in general, as the place where the man gave them an extra scoop of ice-cream. Not sure why we bothered paying the entrance fees for the Vatican, Coliseum, etc.!!)

You are not at all unreasonable.

Bryonyc · 15/07/2014 19:29

My children don't know about the existence of kids clubs or all inclusive hotels.
Their expectations of holidays are just what we've always done - simple UK seaside holidays mostly, bit of walking, eating out, going to the beach, swimming, staying in a cottage, maybe a boat trip and some amusement rides- they don't know any different, and everyone seems to enjoy themselves.

littlejohnnydory · 15/07/2014 19:53

I go on holiday to spend time with my children! They spend enough time at school and activities without sending them to a kids' club when we're on holiday as a family. Yes, they'd probably love to go to Butlins or something and we've never been but they love what we do - beach, camping, walks, playgrounds - and we do go to children's tourist attractions like sea world and so on.

There's definitely no right or wrong - it's not as though you're dragging them along on an adult-focused holiday that they'll hate (my parents once took my car-sick sister on a driving tour of Ireland for a fortnight!)

ChickenFajitaAndNachos · 15/07/2014 20:16

I think you can spend time lots of time with your DC and also put them in a club for a couple of hours and try something like watersking, paragliding etc.

budgiegirl · 15/07/2014 20:21

People don't pick holidays with kids clubs for the kids, they do it to give themselves a break.

I think it's unfair to suggest that parents only go to resorts with clubs because they want a break. I love spending time with my kids, and they like being with us, but they also enjoy meeting other children, playing sports etc, and this way they get the best of both worlds. Plus there's nothing wrong with parents getting a little time to themselves !!

melissa83 · 15/07/2014 20:25

I went to clubs every year from tots to teens. I was in the thomson big t club (remember that!), was in first choice and thomas cook ones and its some of my best childhood memories. My children are enjoying the same.

MorrisZapp · 15/07/2014 20:40

Aren't you marvellous OP.

HaroldLloyd · 15/07/2014 20:46

Just sounds a bit sneery to me.

They enjoy your holidays, they would undoubtedly enjoy a beach pool holiday.

You can't seriously think your depriving them, can you? They are getting a holiday and that's what they know.

HaroldLloyd · 15/07/2014 20:48

Anyone remember holiday showdown, that was IMMENSE.

The adults used to gripe and moan everywhere and the kids always had a lovely time, any where.

BlackeyedSusan · 15/07/2014 21:08

oh my gosh. I have given birth to aliens... well as my children do not like kids clubs and prefer to be with me, they can not be children at all according to your sil...

yabu to think that your sil is the oracle on holidays. you choose stuff to do as a family. things that your children like.

pictish · 15/07/2014 21:16

Omg Holiday Showdown! I loved that show...it really showed people for who they were didn't it?
Not the kids mind...the kids were mostly fine with whatever was thrown their way. It was the adults who were demanding and spoiled.

HaroldLloyd · 15/07/2014 21:18

It really did didnt it.

pictish · 15/07/2014 21:30

Totally. Bring back Holiday Showdown!

Igggi · 15/07/2014 21:39

News flash: different people like different holidays.

NickiFury · 15/07/2014 21:41

And you're not a better parent if you don't put your kids and kids club and nip off to the spa for a couple of hours.

martini · 15/07/2014 21:44

We have done both types of holidays. Our children are now 10 & 12 and enjoy going to places where there are other kids their own age to play with. When they were younger they were pretty much happy to go along with what we wanted to do. They like going to museums and new places but want a bit of their own time too.

As I child I always went on holiday to the same place that was a family hotel with nearby beach and swimming pool plus loads of things like mini golf/ table tennis etc to play. I spent the whole two weeks hanging out with other kids, no organised activities as such but just having freedom. We had a ball.

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 15/07/2014 21:45

We most definitely didn't put them in club last year because we wanted a break, having never done it before, it was quite a tug on the heartstrings for me, but as they get older they need a bit of independence. They decided to try it and loved it, we still got lots of fantastic sightseeing done on the same holiday together, it was just a bit different to our previous do everything as a family holidays.

I loved Holiday Showdown too :)

BuggersMuddle · 15/07/2014 22:10

Well I'm a fairly long way from being a kid (30s) but these things did exist when I was a child.

I remember my favourite holidays with my parents:

  • Exploring ruins in Pompeii
  • Going into the catacombs in Rome with all the stories behind it
  • Swimming in the sea to visit an island with my dad off the coast of portugal

Loads of the above. My only memory relating to kids clubs involved a balls up in instruction, me ending up bored and my parents pissed.

I don't have kids but I know my parents modified their holidays rather than completely changed them. It may be they were fortunate to have a 10 year old interested in Pompey as it goes...

HaroldLloyd · 15/07/2014 22:25

You can do those things AND go to a kids club.