To not choose holidays based on what there is for the kids to do?

[MrsWinnibago]

It's struck me that I'm the only one of all the families I've talked to recently that doesn't choose holidays based on what there is for the kids to do.

I've just never even considered it! Mine like the beach, the countryside, shops and walks as well as walking round castles and towns they've not been to before.

They like shops and galleries and they just seem to enjoy new places.

I was talking to my sister and she was suggesting a particular resort as it has a good kid's club and other things that would appeal to most kids she said.

She went on to say that I'm selfish as I never book anywhere like that. Am I?

Our kids are similar in age...between 6 and 10.

I love city breaks and I've never been a beach person but when kids came along we jettisoned the city breaks and stuck to beach holidays with options for kids activities.

MrsWinnibago a lot of people think that way...not just your sister.

Personally, anywhere with 'evening entertainment' and a kids club is dismissed by us straight away, as these places are (imo) crowded, noisy and vastly overpriced, which is not a holiday for us at all, but a week spending a fortune to be somewhere we don't want to be, surrounded by people we don't want to be with.
I'm with you.

DD loves visiting new places etc and has enjoyed holidays like that.

However, she would tell you her number one holiday was a villa in Spain with friends who has two girls similar ages in a week the children left the villa on three occasions to go to the beach, to go the water park and one meal out. Most days they got up put swimming costumes on and wore them till bedtime. She was 8.
Her second best week was in a 'family' hotel where she made a crowd of friends in the pool who she played with all day and watched movies with all evening in a section of the outdoor restaurant. She was 6.
Interestingly these were my most relaxing holidays too.

Do

Do your children enjoy what you do on holiday?

I think holidays should consider everyone going and what they like. But not all children like kids clubs and other organised activity type things

You do choose holidays that appeal to your kids, beaches, castles etc. same as she does. Don't see issue? You as adults like different things. You both choose holidays your kids will like. They happen to be different types of holidays. My kids like both these type of holidays. Most kids probably would.

YANBU.

I choose holidays based on what I like and what I want to do. My children have all their adult lives to make their own choices. While they're growing up they get my choices!

When I was a child it was self catering cottages and stately homes in the UK and France because that's what my parents wanted. I enjoyed them because I was a kid and kids enjoy pretty much anything they do with their families. But it's certainly not to my taste as an adult.

Now I do travelling/adventure/charity/reeallly remote location holidays, usually in South America. Children have never complained.

When we are choosing our holiday we consider (in order of importance):

1. Is it AI and 4*?
2. Is it less than an hour from the airport?
3. Does it have a kids club?
4. Does it have kids evening entertainment/disco?
5. Does it have daytime entertainment/activities?
6. Does it have a waterpark?
7. Are there more than 2 swimming pools?
8. Does it have more than one restaurant?
9. Can you seperate the adult and child sleeping areas?

10. Does it have a kitchenette/in room fridge?

The first point is for me, the second is for DH, the next 5 points are all for DD and the last 3 are 'nice to haves' if we get everything else we want.

So yeah, I suppose for us it's pretty much all about DD. But then if she is happy, I can relax. If she has other kids around her, is busy and having fun then she doesn't need me. Holidays for me are 90% doing as little as possible to recharge, so I don't want to feel like I am holding DD back.

I think we are similar OP. Mine are nearly 4yrs and 5.5yrs and we've never been to a kids centric holiday. All inclusive resort type things are just not my cup of tea or DH's. I'm sure the kids would have a great time though. I don't feel guilty in the least as I wouldn't feel like I was getting a holiday if I went to a place like that just because of the kids.
This year we are going to Lyon and staying for 2 weeks in an apartment and exporing the city and the surroundings. The kids tolerate enjoy museums and galleries, discovering new places etc...we do a museum/gallery kind of thing in the morning and do something kid centric in the afternoon like taking them to new playgrounds and parks and they have a great time and because it's all a novelty they love it and make friends with the local children and we get to read our books, or even playing in these fantastic parks with them is also fun. There's also outdoor pools if you want to do that.
Previous years we've been to Paris and Berlin for long holidays and it's always been loads of fun for everybody! Next year probably Barcelona!

When my kids were younger we always went to resorts with kids clubs. Even better if the kids wanted to go to both morning AND afternoon sessions! That's because on holiday I like to lie beside the pool and read books and my DH prefers to walk around and see the sights and the kids were not taken with either of those suggestions.

Its so bad that the holidays the kids remember most are the ones with the best kids clubs. They still facebook other kids they met there and don't bear any grudges because their DM was a lazy arse whose idea of a holiday is doing nothing.

YANBU because you do things your way.

YANBU but I utterly detest the all inclusive resort style holidays anyway. We either camp or stay in holiday cottages with interesting things nearby. The DC's enjoy seeing and trying out different things and love camping so it works for us

When I was a kid all of our holidays were in Europe, walking up and down mountains and around castles and monasteries. I realise I was very lucky to go on holiday but I didn't enjoy it.

Now I have kids of my own, it's Butlins all the way - I wish that's where we'd gone when I was young!

My dds are 9&7. We always go on big all inclusive complexes, complete with waterpark , play park etc. we go because we all like that sort of thing.

The hotels often have kids club but we've never used them. We spend most days by the pool or beach. Personally me and dh would prefer italy or somewhere with a nice port and shops etc but my kids would be bored with it. Plus it's often too hot for shopping etc in summer holidays.

I think it depends on your own experiences as kids too

For example my friend was brought up on cottage holidays in Cornwall or wales and so hasn't even though about a package holiday abroad....they just follow the same pattern so her kids can't compare.

However no matter how skint my parents were, we always went abroad...sometimes by bus!! So every year since the dds were 6 months old, we have gone aboard and we save all year to afford it. For us, a cottage or caravan holiday is a second break, not a holiday. I'm not saying that's actually the case, just our perception.

I don't enjoy cleaning, cooking or worrying about the weather etc. it's each to their own but there's no way my kids would prefer city or uk break to eg Majorca but that's because they've been brought up with that type of holiday.

If your kids enjoy it then fine but I'll be honest, I think the most kids would say otherwise if they tried the family resorts! Of course , holidays are about all the family so there's no point going if it's not your cup of tea.

Big pat on the back for you OP.

I never took holiday clubs into account until we stayed at The Atlantis in Dubai. As we walked past the kids asked about it so we had a look and it was amazing, indoor rock climbing area, a myriad of different crafts and instructors, huge room full of consoles and PC's, they couldn't wait to get in there. So left them there while we had dinner and now they always ask to make sure there's a kids club if we are going away. They are 11 and 7 and never been in one before that.

A lot of kids like kids club. You're not a better parent if you don't put them in there. As they get older they'll probably WANT to go.

The best memories I have of family holidays as a child are of the things we did as a family. That's what you're creating, MrsWinnibago - unique memories, not hazy recollections of copy-and-paste kid clubs which will mingle together as one in the future.

Ha - cross posted with NickiFury. Perhaps I'm wrong...

We'd love to go to Paris and Barcelona with our children. I go on holiday to be with them, so kids clubs wouldn't even enter the equation.

I wouldn't be against a hotel with a pool but I'd need there to be other things to do all week! A remote resort wouldn't suite me. I really enjoy cottage/camping holidays and can't see that a resort would be preferable. Just different.

Have never even considered a holiday with a kids club... My kids would refuse to go.

Have never been to a theme park either.

I think if you get used to these things, you can't imagine how kids can amuse themselves without on-tap entertainment. But actually they can. Very easily.

I've never considered it either. I hate the sound of kids club type places and when I was a child, we just did holidays with my parents and sister, beaches, countryside etc. I saw kids clubs on the beach one or two times as a child but would have HATED the idea of going to one. I just wanted to play with my sister/spend time with my parents. One of my favourite holiday memories as a teenager is lying in a field in Brittany with my sister at night watching a meteor shower, or when we were younger spending ages making sandcastles and so on, eating out in the evening or having a barbecue.

So we do the same thing - holiday this year nearish to a beach, swimming lake, forest, canal and plenty of towns we have never visited. Our kids (4 and 6) love simply going to new places. The only thing we made sure of was to book a gite with a big garden for charging around and a splash pool for them to muck about in.

Our holiday last year (and the year before that) was at a place with a huge on site waterpark that opened at 10 and closed at 4. DD made a great little bunch of friends on day one and after that we barely saw her for 6 hours a day. She had an absolute blast and is still in touch with the friends she made - to a point where the three of them hatched a plan to try and get us all to go to the same place at the same time this year (and had we not just moved I probably would have been up for it too). DH and I sometime reminisce about the holidays we had pre DD, but there is plenty of time for that later on, for now I enjoy what we do.

We like both. We do kids club type hotels and we do youth hostels, we do country breaks, city breaks, seaside holidays. Things my kids have done with holiday kids clubs, they are 6 years old:

Learning to sail
Driving speed boats
Kayaking
Swimming
Wind surfing
Zorbing
Bungee trampolines
Pony riding
Water skiing
Fishing
Tennis
Yoga
Sports
Climbing wall
Beach camp outs with telescopes to see the stars, toasting marshmallows round the fire
BBQ cook outs

All professional tuition where appropriate. As well as the usual crafts, treasure hunts, cooking etc etc

Don't knock holiday kids club, some of them are amazing!

Mine are 8 and 10. Our holidays have always been like yours, campsites and holiday cottages, beaches, National Trust properties etc etc. We've had some brilliant holidays. I used to wonder why people used holiday clubs, surely the point of being on holiday is to spend time together etc.

Last year we decided to have a change and went on a cruise, which I would previously have thought of as my idea of hell. It was great, so easy, the DCs did all the sightseeing stuff with us very happily, they particularly liked Rome, Pisa and Gibraltar, but also spent a lot of time in the kids club, while we just relaxed. I felt a bit odd letting them go, as if I was palming them off, but actually, it was the other way round, a great opportunity for them to spread their wings and do things without us, great for their independence. DS was in tears the on the last night when he had to sign out of club and go home in the morning. I was well and truly proved wrong. I'm sure most of our future holidays will still be campsites and holiday cottages, but I will not dismiss kids clubs again.

I am not talking about naff mascot disco type ones!

There's different ways of using them though isn't there. For example I wouldn't put them in for all day sessions, I like going things with them and I am not really a lie on the beach for hours person. So I would probably drop them in for an hour or two for a peaceful lunch or dinner and if they ask later on in the afternoon then we'd put them in then for a couple of hours. The last one we went too had big chests of sparkly dressing up costumes, which dd loved and a huge outdoor splash area with lifeguards on duty. I think sometimes they want a break from us as they get older.

Heels, you see that sounds amazing and if I saw that in a brochure Inwould he sticking it under the DC's noses and swallowing my dislike but I know my kids too well, they would spend about 3 hours at the kids club then repeat "nah, don't want to" for the rest of the holiday and we'd end up doing what we usually do anyway