....to wish the woman next to me would stop making sex noises?

[Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses]

On antenatal ward being monitored. The woman in the opposite bay is I think having contractions, but with every one is making the biggest sex noises/groans/sighs I've ever heard.

I can't remember contractions being that much fun...!?

Perhaps she's eating a yoghurt?

Yabu.

She's possibly in labour. You're being stupid.

That gas and air sucky noise is getting right on my tits too.
Plus her partner has now starting ringing ALL the extended family to announce the impending labour in a very loud annoying voice.

worra that's cheered me right up

Worra that was my thought! Or sniffing her oh so fragrant hair.

She's possibly in labour. You're being stupid.

I flipping well hope she's in labour so they can ship her off to labour ward!

Ha! Must be annoying but of course YABU.

Are you in labour yourself? Perhaps you're transitioning good luck!

She's possibly in labour. You're being stupid.

I flipping well hope she's in labour so they can ship her off to labour ward!

I thought you were on a train or something.

Yabu about the sex noises during contractions. Not so much about annoying phone conversations.

Wait till your in labour, see if you keep quiet!!

worra

The midwife's come in and asked him to take his phone off loudspeaker, thank fuck. I was about to launch it and him out of the window.

Pleasure and pain noises sound alike. Odd isn't it? Real sobbing can sound like laughter too sometimes.

Are you in labour yourself?

No but if I was I'm sure I would be quiet as a mouse, possibly knitting or doing a wordsearch

Perhaps she's eating a yoghurt?
with Wok Gan standing there feeding it to her saying 'you go girl'?

I wish I had that much fun with contractions!

Ugh I remember being induced and trying to sleep with mild contractions all night. A couple wheeled in with their new baby at about 10pm. Her DH then proceeds to call everyone to really loudly let them know "how large Oliver's testicles were" for about 20 minutes.

When DS was born with a suspected fractured skull my DH was told he couldn't stay as it was after 9pm. I went f*cking mad.

Even the women in the room next to me would have preferred that to the god almighty streaks of agony I was making with dd, she got stuck and I went through a dry ventos delivery, with a horrible midwife who doped me up with diamorphine to "help me sleep" and just made things worse. She also told me to shut up and "deal with it". So yup, sex moans would definitely be preferable!

Her sex noises are probably better to listen to than the exorcist-like vomiting I did on the antenatal ward. They ended up moving the other woman out. I think I was scaring her. So YABa bit U.

Ha Original and Squatting - have you met before?

Another timely reminder that no matter what you do, no matter where you are, there will be some bitch judging you.

Her partner is having trouble getting the message across to 'Nanna.' Nanna's not getting it at all, so he's having to shout, and then repeat every response to sex noise lady, after being made to turn loudspeaker off.

Mr SN - nanna? NANNA? Can you hear me?? It's Mr Sex Noise!! NANNA!

Why is she a bitch?

Aren't people allowed to blow off steam anymore? The woman in question is unaware and the OP isn't kicking off, she thinks it's funny. I sounded like a moose when I went for the big push. I didn't care and neither does the woman.

It's an observation. In fact, there was a whole hysterical episode of Friends laughing at different women in the birthing process.

She's in hospital, sharing a room with strangers, snoring, farting, moaning, groaning, beeping machines, lights flickering, staff talking, doors banging, curtains swishing. There's no privacy and no dignity, and very little sleep. It's shit.

Another timely reminder that no matter what you do, no matter where you are, there will be some bitch judging you.

True dat!

For instance, I was just called a 'bitch!' By a stranger! Can you imagine!?

I just feel sorry for the woman who's probably in pain, having some random woman post about her "sex noises" on the internet. There's no privacy and no dignity anyway in those places and now people have to be aware that some random will be assessing what they do and whacking it on a forum.

But yeah, so hilaaaaarious!