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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To squeeze 4 people into a 2 bed house?

92 replies

MagersfonteinLugg · 13/07/2014 22:14

Am going to look at a house in the morning as cannot live with DH much longer. The house is in the perfect area and the estate agent has told me that the LL lets to Housing Benefit applicants so would be ideal, but.....
it only has 2 bedrooms and my 3 DCs have always had their own rooms up till now, so won't be happy about sharing.
AIBU to even consider this house?
DCs are DS(12), DD(7) and DS(6).

OP posts:

Showoffer1 · 13/07/2014 22:16

Could you and DD share and the two DS share?

WhispersOfWickedness · 13/07/2014 22:16

How would you organise it? DD in with you? You in living room and bedrooms divided by gender?

SiennaBlake · 13/07/2014 22:17

Sofa bed for you I think! That way eldest can have his own space.

soverylucky · 13/07/2014 22:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

VioletHare · 13/07/2014 22:26

How big is the largest room? Could it be split?

My house is two bedroom, we have one standard double (ours) and one huge double. If we needed to, we could easily split the big one into two rooms so might be worth remembering.

Namechangearoonie123 · 13/07/2014 22:28

Dining room that could be your bedroom?

youmademesolate · 13/07/2014 22:28

Lone voice from me then - I think you would BU, sorry. It just isn't fair on anybody, including you!

ikeaismylocal · 13/07/2014 22:28

Sil has 2 children ( boy/girl both teenagers) they have a tiny 2 bed home and sil sleeps on the sofa whilst the kids each have a room each.

I would give your oldest his own room, younger 2 share and you sleep on the sofa, if you haven't moved by the time the 6/7 year olds are 9/10 then split the room boys/girl.

FatewiththeLeadPiping · 13/07/2014 22:28

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SuburbanRhonda · 13/07/2014 22:30

You will get loads of people coming on here telling you how 17 of them lived in a shoebox with no running water, so just because someone else could do it, doesn't mean it will be plain sailing for you.

However, it sounds like you have made a massive step to change your life, so you will make it work. It'll be a squeeze, but finding a LL who will take HB is no mean feat.

This was meant to be, OP - go for it and good luck

Glenshee · 13/07/2014 22:33

Depends what other options you have, doesn't it?

If you go for it then see whether it's possible to separate the boys bedroom by a shelving unit in the middle for example or in some other way. Doesn't have to be a wall-like structure just something to reduce visibility of the other half of the room, for privacy. Depends on the size of the bedroom obviously.

ithoughtofitfirst · 13/07/2014 22:37

I would do it if it were me. As long as you've got a roof over your head for the minute. Nothing is ever permanent either Xx

Billygoats · 13/07/2014 22:37

Only you can decide if you and your family need this.

I think it can work and I don't see why a 12 and 6 year old cannot share a room. That really isn't a big ask. Many families have children sharing rooms, it's not the best situation but its hardly living on the streets. Good luck.

expatinscotland · 13/07/2014 22:41

It's rented, so not permanent. Sounds like you need to get away from your h. It's a yes from me.

OxfordBags · 13/07/2014 22:43

If you need to get away from an abusive OH, then anywhere is better for your DC than where you currently are with him in the picture.

EatTheRude · 13/07/2014 22:45

I left my DH and took my 4 children to a 2 bedroomed house. I had a sofa bed downstairs. It wasn't ideal but far better than living with him.

SaucyJack · 13/07/2014 22:48

Does it have a dining room you could sleep in?

steppemum · 13/07/2014 22:49

We had 3 dcs and a 2 bed house.
we moved out when dcs were 8, 6 and 4.

The eldest was desperate to have his own space. At our new house the younger 2 shared until dd1 was 8 and then she had her own room, again she was really wanting it by then.

It actually worked for sleeping, as they were all good sleepers, and we did have an extra room downstairs where all the toys were.
I think it was the lack of space when friends came round, and how hard it was to keep your own stuff away from the others.

I think to put all 3 in together when the oldest is 12 would be really tough for them

The bottom line is though, if that is what you can afford, they will have to like it and deal with it.

CaptChaos · 13/07/2014 22:49

Get away from the OH. The happier life you will have will offset any niggles about bedrooms.

ReallyTired · 13/07/2014 22:52

Its a temporary stop gap while you get away from your abusive husband. Once your divorce is finalised then you can look for somewhere more permament.

I think a sofa bed downstairs is a better option. I would have the two youngest children share a room and give the eldest the smaller of the two bedrooms. A twelve year old really needs somewhere where he can get on with homework. The younger two can share happily.

VioletHare · 13/07/2014 22:56

Hate to be the voice of reason, but...the op hasn't actually said her dh is abusive. Just that she can't live with him any more.

For all we know, that could be because he keeps leaving his dirty socks on the floor

Original poster

MagersfonteinLugg · 13/07/2014 22:59

I really can't see the boys sharing. Can DS2 and DD share/ Is that legal?
Anyway, it has a sep dining toom but a tiny kitchen, so I am thinking that I can sleep in the lounge, DS1 in the dining room and the 2 youngers upstairs.
Is that feasible do you think?
I really want this area as its in walking distance of their present school I will not be able to keep the car (5 mile drive atm)as it's Dhs so need to be near school.
I so want to make a cosy family home for us all but is this too cosy?

OP posts:

steppemum · 13/07/2014 23:05

The younger ones can share.

Give oldest his own room, you have the dining room.

Sounds perfectly doable.

Original poster

MagersfonteinLugg · 13/07/2014 23:08

Thanks.
I think I just needed to hear someone tell me me it can be done.

OP posts:

riskit4abiskit · 13/07/2014 23:12

Can you fit a small ikea style table n chairs in the living room and make the dining room your bedroom. Is there a garden? If so perhaps in the future the dc could have their own playhouse or hobby shed for a bit of personal space?

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