Page 2 | to never drink again as I have a child who I may need to take to hospital!?!

WhatsMyAgeAgain · 2014-07-07T07:44:54+00:00

Not really a thread about a thread but certainly a thread about something that I've only ever heard of on MN. So people with children, who drive, never go above the limit in case of emergency?! Going above the limit being a home poured g and t or glass of wine. Does anyone have an experience of needing to take a child into hospital after having a drink? Did you find a taxi so inconvenient? Were hospital staff just mortified that an adult had had a drink while on charge of a child? As the only driver in my house, am I expected to be ready to drive 24/7? Seems daft and unreasonable to me. So what are your thought- aibu to remain under the limit for the next 18 years!?

StealthPolarBear · 07/07/2014 10:26

Yanbu! And dont sleep either, if they need you you would waste precious seconds waking up. :o
that said I am very lucky to have 2 fit and healthy children. If they had chronic conditions I wojld be likely to feel differently. And if thsy are ill I dont drink, usually I wouldn't be anyway but I have in tbe past not drank when ds has gone to bed with a sore ear in case I have to make the usual middle of the night dash to the hospital

differentnameforthis · 07/07/2014 10:28

People make choices about what is best for their family.

I don't see what harm is being done if they decide they'd rather not drink to excess in the evenings.

I also don't see how it is anyone else's concern what they decide to do.

Runwayqueen · 07/07/2014 10:54

I drive, but I never drink.

I don't drink because I don't like to, not because I fear dd will need an emergency trip to a&e, although if she did it obviously wouldn't be a problem as a non drinker. Dp is the same, once in a blue moon he will have a single pint

hiccupgirl · 07/07/2014 11:03

My DH insists he can't have a drink if he's in sole charge of DS in case he needs to drive him to hospital in the night.

I don't drink anyway so it's not an issue for me.

We have had to take DS to A&E and the OOHs doctor in the night a couple of times for very high temps and croup but all those times I drove.

Maddaddam · 07/07/2014 11:10

We've never had an emergency trip to hospital in the night in 14 years of parenting 3 children. No chronic conditions or reason to think anyone might need to go (actually I've never taken a child to A&E at all, DP has once, it doesn't seem something to base our life around).

But if some sudden serious emergency happened isn't that what ambulances are for, as they have the equipment and experts too?

mrssnodge · 07/07/2014 11:19

DS- (about 10 at the time) was playing with cousin whilst his mum & me were necking wine in kitchen, My DS fell over jumping off settee doing wrestling moves was in great pain, I was too drunk to drive- ( but not mortal obviously)- Cue a hurried call to his dad, my EXH, and he drove us to A& E, my DS had fractured his wrist!-EXH was livid, that I was drinking whilst in charge of DS- EERR, he never bloody bothered with DS so I soon put that right, - but I did feel guilty!!!
P. S. I also had greasy hair in plaits, and was wearing trrackie bottoms-(Ooh the shame) does this mean we should always be immacutley dressed with clean hair unless something happens to DC??

Sirzy · 07/07/2014 11:22

DS has brittle asthma, as a single parent I make sure I am capable of driving most of the time but I also have a lot of support living nearby including a t-total sister so she is only a call away for a hospital trip anyway

Theodorous · 07/07/2014 11:28

Not that but years ago when we were in Saudi I had to take my husband to hospital for facial stitches during a New Year's Eve party. Didn't drive but had to tell the doctor we had been drinking illegally before they gave him sedation. Luckily he was fine but never again.

SpandexBallet · 07/07/2014 11:44

We've always done it here. Live 30 mins from the nearest A&E. We'd have to wait over an hour for a taxi (at £40!!) and 20 mins for an ambulance if it was blue lighting it! It's easier to drive for us. Instead of calling them, waiting and then faffing and taking another 20 mins to get there.

However we live in a lovely community where if my neighbours had one two many they wouldn't think twice about ringing the doorbell for a lift at 2 in the morning and I wouldn't think twice about doing it.

Just always been the way.

lagoon · 08/07/2014 12:05

I drink often when I'm in sole charge of my DC, never ever get bladdered . If the need arose to go to hosp would get a taxi, or have parent nearby who could help.
The only time I regretted drinking (on a school night as well) was when a close relative fell seriously ill and I needed to get to the hospital asap (literally to say goodbye ) and I couldn't drive, then DP wasn't home, taxi's had massive wait, I had to get lift off a neighbour and felt a bit Although due to their condition the relative in question didn't know anything about it, I wanted to get there asap and couldn't.

TattyDevine · 08/07/2014 12:16

I think its crazy to always stay sober just in case, though of course its personal choice, but I think its really bad to judge others for not.

Dawndonna's situation is understandable, of course, but generally, I just don't think its necessary.

I have an alcosafe mobile breathalyser and a 250 ml glass of wine (that's a large one) or a gin and tonic (I have tested after both) don't get me above .04 which is half the legal limit. I am these days careful not to drink more than 2 decent sized glasses of wine on any one day and on that basis, if something happened in the middle of the night, I would breathalise safe to drive anyway I suppose. Which is why not drinking at all just in case seems a bit ott.

I live 7 mins from a hospital, there are plenty of taxis and an ambulance would take less than 2 minutes to get here (I once called one when I thought my son's airway was blocked because I didn't want to put him in a car seat as I wouldn't have been able to monitor him and thought the position of the car seat might make it worse) and I'd barely finished giving them my postcode when I heard the siren in the background.

So its all a little OTT imo but of course there will be exceptions with chronic conditions

CallMeExhausted · 08/07/2014 12:23

Let me search old MN threads...

The computer says "no drinking"

Thurlow · 08/07/2014 12:26

My line on level of 'drunkenness' when responsible for DC is "could I cope with vomit or diarrhea without needing to join in?"

MaitlandGirl · 08/07/2014 12:34

I very rarely drink these days as everytime I do someone needs to go to the hospital. It once took me 4 attempts to open a bottle of wine because of DS and his appendix.

I don't see the point of drinking at all anymore, as I'm the only driver in the house and even if we're at the inlaws for the day I've still got to drive home.

If DP drove then I'd drink but shes epileptic so can't get a licence and is the cause of almost half our hospital trips so far this year.

offtoseethewizard64 · 08/07/2014 13:03

I wonder how often people need to go to A&E.
I have a severely disabled DD with complex health needs and she has been to A&E loads of time - but always in an Ambulance as it is usually a life threatening emergency. I have never avoided having a drink or two because of it though - God knows it's what keeps most parents of children with SN sane.
My DS on the other hand has no health problems and has never been to hospital in 17 years (except to visit his sister). That would have been a lot of not drinking 'just in case'.
And we too live in a rural area where you would struggle to get a taxi and the hospital is 1/2hr away in an ambulance - and for that reason I would always call an ambulance in an emergency rather than try and get there in the car. They have medical equipment on board and can start treatment straight away.

meddie · 08/07/2014 13:07

I,m a nurse, would never judge a parent for being a bit worse for wear during an emergency admission. the very nature of the fact its an emergency means it was unexpected. Life happens. you cant expect people to stay sober until their children are adults 'just in case'.

MegCleary · 08/07/2014 13:12

Agreed Meddie.

weyayechickenpie · 08/07/2014 13:25

Ive turned up drunk to hospital before and was mortified. My dad was watching dd for the night while me and partner had are first night alone. I drank alot and had red fangs that wouldnt wash off from drinking a mixture of drinks. I get a phone call to say that dd wouldnt stop being sick and that he was taking her to a & e. He had overfed her she was being weaned at the time and she ate to much. Hospital staff were lovely but I kept saying sorry as I was worse for wear and stinking of drink. Never want to be in that position again. I still drink but havent felt able to enjoy it like I did before having kids.

weyayechickenpie · 08/07/2014 13:25

Ive turned up drunk to hospital before and was mortified. My dad was watching dd for the night while me and partner had are first night alone. I drank alot and had red fangs that wouldnt wash off from drinking a mixture of drinks. I get a phone call to say that dd wouldnt stop being sick and that he was taking her to a & e. He had overfed her she was being weaned at the time and she ate to much. Hospital staff were lovely but I kept saying sorry as I was worse for wear and stinking of drink. Never want to be in that position again. I still drink but havent felt able to enjoy it like I did before having kids.

PosingInManilla · 08/07/2014 13:35

There seems to be posters on this thread who think there is nothing inbetween being over the limit and blind drunk.

3 drinks takes you over the limit but probably wouldn't see most people incapable of looking after their children.

KERALA1 · 08/07/2014 13:37

Lives next door to hospital

JoandMax · 08/07/2014 13:45

Me and DH will have a fair amount to drink now our DC are a bit older (4 and nearly 6) - we've even rolled home drunk at 4am before, shock horror! We drink in the daytime too sometimes with them there and certainly get tipsy

The only time we were a bit more cautious was when DS2 was a baby as he did need to go to hospital a fair bit so even though I didn't drive and would need a taxi one of us wouldn't have more than a couple just incase.....

Purplepoodle · 08/07/2014 15:23

Myself and oh enjoy a beverage on the weekend. We only have a couple of glasses of wine or beer. We wouldn't get legless when we have the kids. If one of the children needed hospital we would phone a taxi.

maras2 · 08/07/2014 15:34

We've never had a car as we live centrally in a large City.Good public transport,only ever £10 taxi fare to all city amenities and walking distance for work/school etc.Yes we planned this when we first married 39 years ago.The only thing that would make me think twice about having a drink if a hospital visit were necessary would be the embarrassment of breathing booze breath over the HCP's.I was a nurse before retirement and came across this all too often.Not nice.

iwantgin · 08/07/2014 15:42

This has never crossed my mind.

DS has got to 16 without my frequent occasional nightly wine drinking as a LP being

I dont know anyone who has abstained from a glass or two purely because the DC are around either.