Joni, there are also parents whose Little Jonnie did get the lead role, after they specifically explained to the staff after the nativity play was upsetting for yours that any stage event freaks your kid the fuck out, and please to leave them in the chorus. Way, way back in the chorus.
If you've had the experience, after that explanation, of going up for post-show snaps when your child was instead given the lead role, and asking how they feel only for his white-faced miserable little self to say quietly, "hot..." and then in tones of quiet desperation, "can I have a hug, Mummy?" while the bloody harridan of a head-teacher starts snippily asking all parents to go, because, "this is the problem when you let them take photos, they all want to hug their children..." then you might also feel likewise. These were 4 and 5 year olds, btw. One of the others was in floods of tears.
It's great when kids are happy and confident about performing, and I understand how proud it would make you if that were so, and annoying when they get passed over. But some kids are old in their year, and seemingly confident, and the teachers know they can be trusted to behave nicely, enounciate carefully and put some expression in their voices. The fact they hate every single second is neither here nor there, it seems.
We moved DS three weeks later. It was the final fucking straw. His new teacher listened, believed us, and allowed him to opt out altogether from the first class assembly and has put him in the back row, line-less, on all staged events since. So nope, not all parents who don't want that are "fucking liars". Some of us genuinely know our kids can't handle it, however brave a face they put on at school.
I think some parents might need to be careful what they wish for.