to think that actually a lot of women secretly think like this about having a boy?

[channing55]

I just read in the papers about this silly woman who had a boob job on the NHS, is now pregnant and said if she had known it was a boy she would have had an abortion and is drinking and smoking throughout her pregnancy because she doesn't care because it's a boy.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2673898/Im-drinking-smoking-boy-Pregnant-model-boob-job-NHS-says-shed-abortion-shed-known-wasnt-girl.html

I know most women who are pregnant with a boy wouldn't go to the extreme of having an abortion or smoking and drinking but I have heard so many negative remarks from mums pregnant with a boy about how disappointed they are and even when I was pregnant people made rude comments about (me) having a boy.

I actually think a lot of women are secretly disappointed when they find out they are having a boy and that this woman's horrible attitude is just an extreme example of how much prejudice and nastiness there is now towards little boys and the nasty cliches society now attributes to them?

No I can honestly say I was not disappointed to have a boy. DS is very much spoilt as he is the only grandson in mine and his dad's family (although we don't see his dad, that is another story). I would have loved to have had more children and feel sad sometimes for myself and DS that we don't have a father figure and more kids, but that isn't cause I wanted a girl, more than wanting a "proper family" for DS (although I have disabused myself of the notion that we're not a "proper family").

i have 4 boys and when i found out my 4th was a boy i wasn't disappointed at all we were just as excited as we were with our first.
i think she will say anything and do anything to keep her face in the papers

I don't know if it's something to do with where i live or the types of people I hang out with but no one I've met gives the tiniest of shits what gender they have.

Worraloadashite.

That woman is a craving fame in any way she can get.
Boys are fab. Tbh I don't understand why any woman could be disappointed to be carrying a child of the 'wrong'sex. My boys (and my dd) are the best things that ever happened to me and women like her make me sick.
My sil and my friend would give anything to be able to have a baby. She should be grateful she can have children.

After the birth of DD1 I got congratulated a fair few times for having done things 'properly' believe it or not because our eldest is a boy so we had one of each. Not just older people either (which while not wanting to stereotype I would have expected it to be the older generation to have this opinion) but all sorts if ages - I didn't realise until that point that women still get the blame for the sex of the child. The disbelief when we announced we were expecting a third AND that we knew it was a girl - we had some tests done due to suspected anomalies- was surprising. Quite a few people asked me if I was relieved she was a girl. I regard them with a lot less friendliness now tbh.
YABU, very much YABU.

I have a lot of friends with all boy families and I have 2 and none of us are disappointed in the slightest!!

I really really wasn't fussed by gender at all, I just wanted my baby. I was delighted when both were born as they were here and beautiful and snuggly and being a boy never came into it. They are amazing and wonderful and I don't feel like anything is lacking in my life/family by not having girls.

If anything I think DH was more gender biased, he never admitted it at the time but he does now say if we were only going to have one gender then he's happy it was boys.......

lucy I do struggle to 'get' my friends daughters and the stuff they like - it's all hair, nails, looms and flipping 1D....I love taking my lad to the match and we are always out kicking a ball around and climbing trees. I know girls can do this too, but I seriously couldn't cope with some of the more girly things.

But that's the thing. I'm sure we all love our children just as they are. My 3yo DD is so girly when I was always a tomboy. My mum was shocked she's already into make up, nails, refused to wear anything but dresses and obsessed with disney princesses. But I still love her to bits and play along with the girly things. I'm sure if I have a boy, and if he likes kicking a ball around, I'll be just as happy to play along.

I seriously don't think this woman is for real. It's click bait by the mail. We aren't in some other country where they'd get rid of female fetuses.

Woman in the link is awful and I'm sorry for her kids.

BUT, there is such a thing as gender disappointment and I've met plenty of women who do clearly think girls are better than boys – for reasons such as they are more girly, you can do girly things with them ([hmm - I hate this - because what if you have a girl but she's not a girly girl? way to make your child feel like a let-down), they aren't noisy and boisterous (again perhaps if you constantly disapprove of your girl for being anything other than decorous, she learns) and at the other end of the scale, extreme feminists who hate boys for being male. We grew up with one of these on our street, she was a single mother with a boy and a girl, she openly and to extremes favoured the girl, and would slag the boy off to other people in front of him. :(

I think in the main though, if you have a boy, you will realise that having a boy is fab. The main offenders IME, among people I know, are the SMoG type - they have only had girls and think they are sooooo lucky and look pityingly at you with your boy/s, and may say things like "Oh i do feel so lucky that I just had girls" and "boys are such hard work, poor you." They tend to be middle-class types whose girls are dressed head-to-toe in matching frilly Boden and go to private school.

I am not exaggerating, I know a good handful mums like this just in my circle of acquaintances/other mums at school & nursery/neighbours.

Just because in the world at large, there is much more prejudice against girls which I agree is awful, doesn't mean it's OK the other way round. That pitying concern that I have to put up with a boy gives me the rage.

Upthread a pp wrote that men secretly all want boys.

Not me. I wanted a girl, because I grew up in an all-male environment (DM had few feminine attributes apart from savage PMT).

And what a delight she is, even if she does do housework after midnight.

I'm insulted that you've tarred all of us mothers of boys with the same brush as this idiot.

I just read in the papers about this silly woman...

And your first thought was "Oooh, I must join Mumsnet to post about it"

OP didn't tar all mothers of boys with the same brush. She said "a lot of women ... think like this about having boys." IME quite a few women do, luckily mainly they tend to be women who have not had boys.

Rubbish.

I have 2 HEALTHY girls.
Didn't give a toss what we was having aslong as they was healthy.
Mind you, i was shocked at the amount of people who presumed i wanted a boy when i was pregnant with DD2.

She will say anything to get into the papers and get people talking..and she was got exactly that.

Some want girls because they want to project their unfulfilled princess complex onto them, its objectifying to their poor female child.

I was v happy to have my boy and v happy to have my girl.

I think this woman is not representative of anyone but herself and it's a v sad case if true.

I agree with above that if anything attitudes are slightly in favour of boys, from communities where only boys are valued to a vague sense of familial approval in wider population to a wide spread view that boys are easier (most mums I know think the last).

Not all women who have a preference for girls want a miniature princess/dressing up doll.

I certainly don't. My DD is as far from girly as it's possible to be. I'm a Disney-hating feminist.

I think for me it was fear of the unknown. I know I can successfully parent a girl. My DD is amazing. I was afraid of the perceived challenges that parenting a boy would bring.

Plus I had a misguided idea that DD would be closer to a sister than a brother.

I also love that DD is bookish and quite lazy like me . I was terrified of a crazy sporty child who would require more exercise as the dog .

I caught myself on. Gender doesn't matter and you can't predict what any child will be like based on their genitalia. I will give my baby the same 100% love and dedication that I give DD and hopefully he will turn out just as amazing.

Actually, forget my previous post. I wanted a kitten so was vair disappointed.

If this is actually true - and not either exaggerated hugely by DM or just crap spouted by JC to get yet more attention - I would actually be very concerned about her attitude towards the two sons she already has. She would basically be saying "I don't want another one like you, so I don't care if I harm him" .

Maybe if this is genuinely how she feels, the baby would be better off being removed by SS at birth to give him the chance to be adopted by someone who will love him & want him .

Poor child, conceived as a product of his mother's prostitution & then hated so much that she couldn't give a shit about his health. And he's not even born yet.

TBH, I just think that JC is not very clever & speaks without even thinking. Mind you, when she was interviewed on Loose Women (I know ) recently she pretty much struggled to string a sentence together.

YABU

For a) reading the Daily Mail and b) taking it seriously.

you can't predict what any child will be like based on their genitalia

This

Yes YABVU

Nope, I can't imagine any sane person thinking like that.

I think you must mix in some very odd circles if you've heard negative remarks about having a boy

I haven't bothered opening the link - sounds very gutter press just from what you describe - taking advantage of / exploiting a woman who hasn't go the sense she was born with.

What a crock of shit.... I know of no-one at all who was disappointed in having a boy. I was over the moon!!!

I surprised myself by having quite a strong preference for a girl when I found out I was pregnant. I'm not a girly shopping type woman myself at all so I don't think it was that. I think there is a general preference for girl babies but nowhere near the level that the OP is talking about. Anyway, I'm 24 weeks and now know it's a boy and I'm thrilled! One friend was openly commiserating with me for it being a boy - very odd.

As a separate and pretty inconsequential point, I do think boy's baby clothes are rubbish though. Or rather baby clothes in general maybe. I want some jolly primary colours not various shades of denim with trucks on! Seem to only get nice bright basics quite expensively.

I'm the opposite - always saw myself with 2 boys. Was delighted for my dad when ds turned up as I am one of 2 girls so thought my dad would finally have someone to play football with.

Was then oddly surprised when no2 was a girl. I was actually briefly disappointed - although clearly I soon snapped out of that and would never have deliberately harmed her in any way.

V odd assertion that all women want to have baby girls? (and weird idea that people would deliberately harm a child of the 'wrong' gender)