An IPOAT Ball in honour of days of yore and yon mighty Maiden Juice

[Hullygully]

Shall we?

He is very young for a gardener. Ought he not to be in kindergarden rather than lady garden?

She were Fids

I should like to attend the ball, but I fear I have quite lost my bloom.

We can rustle you up a bloom. Mistress Fids is quite the expert on bloom-restoring tisanes. That and an orf white slightly dusty snood and you'll be tickety boo.

indeed fids....indeed. But after the incident in the basement I felt the need for a change of scene and, of course, name.

I wonder if the coat of arms is still down there.....

here is a frock for you dear Bofferina...tis all the rage in Vienna

I am feeling a little faint. Is my light super ready?

Once I have partaken of sustenance I may find the strength to join the eventide's merrymaking.

Will the young gardener be in attendance?

certainly, although he may be a little worse for wear...mayhap that's where the Maiden Juice comes in?

I packed this. Will it suffice?

I am most obliged, Madame. It should coordinate most pleasingly with my skin.

Perhaps MaryZ would like this demure little outfit? wot, wiv her being a virgin an' all.

Exit I have just the tisane for you if you are feeling faint. I am still busy in the distillery herb-drying shed taking the inventory so have asked one of our new curates to attend to you.

My, we can now have pictures delivered to the IPOAT Hall and no longer have to wait for Master Squinty to paint and then deliver them.

Tis a Wonder.

Sadly I am unable to glimpse the young gentleman. Is he dissembling?

I have no idea what any of you are talking about but you all sound rather clever.

I am aghast. We don't want scarlet ladies here.

Perhaps he is somewhat timid due to the holy nature of his calling? You might also find the Catholic clergy rather more daring

Ah, Miss Scarlet, always welcome as long as Mr Rhett accompanies her.

I curtsey to your superior discernment.

And shall there be any gentlemen of a Uruguayan persuasion? They seem to enjoy wearing their chemises in a rather close-fitting fashion- I may need my smelling salts.

Exit Please ignore the sour-faced Prior, he was turned to stone after suggesting only non-alcoholic tisanes should ever be served.

He does seem a trifle unrelenting.

I say, how handsome prelates have become of late. There is something striking about a man in a collar with a stern expression. Has anyone seen my fan?

Yes, it used to be all Richard Chamberlin from lurking by Ayrs Rock and nowt much else.

I blame Dan Brown.