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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to tell my mother I've had enough? (v v long)

85 replies

HouseLikeAZoo · 19/06/2014 09:27

This is my first AIBU, and it's a huge long backstory one. My situation is quite distinctive so I will probably out myself here.

I am considering writing to my mum to tell her that I've had enough of her selfish behaviour. I suspect it will end with me going NC. I really just want some advice from you all about whether I will come to regret it - and I need to be told to grow a spine after years of pandering to her.

Short version: my mum is in her third marriage. My brother & I are from her first marriage. When we toddlers, my parents divorced, and unusually, custody was split so that I stayed with my mum and my brother with my dad. This was back in the 70's and not in the UK. My father was/still is an alcoholic and not in any way fit to be a parent. Still, my mum "gave" him her 3-yr old DS and moved away with me. She tells me it was "to save having a long court battle". My brother's life has turned out ok but has seen him having to basically raise himself, clear up after my DF and generally go through more shit than anyone deserves. He has had little contact with my mum although remains civil to her.

I have since then had two more "dads", and at primary school age, moved to the UK (my mum as she had an affair with a Brit & then came here to marry him). I spoke no English when we moved and found the whole thing pretty horrific. I knew no-one and was separated from all my friends & rest of my family. My brother was left behind in another country, but my mum didn't seem to find the happiness of either of her kids a huge concern.

Throughout my childhood & now adulthood, my mum has treated me like hired help. I was charged with the family cooking, cleaning and laundry from the age of 12 onwards. If my standard of my dusting & ironing weren't high enough, I'd have to do it again. Leaving for university was a relief - although I had no financial support from my (well off) parents, it was nice to be my own person. However her selfish behaviour did not stop; It's always all about her.

I'm now married with a lovely DH and two DSs. When I had a miscarriage with complications, I received no sympathy and no visit from her. When my children were small, she made it clear that they were in her opinion "feral" and that she had no desire to help us (this despite the fact that my father in law died when my boys were 1 & 3 and we were desperate for support). When I told her I'd been referred to the breast cancer clinic her response was to complain bitterly about her terrible luck because her kitchen fit was going badly. I didn't tell her about my depression for months, but when I finally confided in her, she told me I should count myself lucky that my DH hadn't left me because of it.

All the while she expects me to do her bidding unquestioningly. She phones me to tell me to sort out her computer/kindle/tv/phone, she requires me to sell stuff on eBay for her (and then blames me for not getting enough profit on her old cowboy boots), she expects me (and DH) to come over to dig garden features/paint ceilings/shift stuff whenever she wants, she thinks nothing of phoning ahead when coming to visit to request her favourite wine/food/coffee be waiting for her. She gives me her hand-me-down clothes and shoes as presents, and once agreed to one evening of babysitting my boys as my birthday present from her.

Stupidly, I have let her away with it for 37 years.

The final straw came last week. My stepfather has been very poorly and my mum has been visiting him every day in hospital. She wanted a weekend off from visiting, so told me to visit on saturday (I was going anyway so no probs) and told my stepbrother to visit on Sunday. My stepbrother couldn't make Sunday, so decided to come with me on Saturday instead. When my mum got wind of this, she lost the plot completely, told my DSB that she was gutted he was doing this, and generally spent a Friday night messaging him and me, ranting on about how everything was ruined. For some reason she had decided that only she could be in charge of the hospital visiting schedule and thought it was reasonable for her to forbid my Dad's own son from visiting when he wanted to. For the first time in my adult life I told her that she had gone too far, and her response was stunning.

She refused to talk to me, except to tell me she didn't want to talk to me. When I asked her how dad was, she refused to tell me. She texted me to tell me that she won't be in touch. This carried on for days, until she decided she needed me to do her a favour (drive a 2-hr round trip to lend her a garden item) and then she got back in touch as if nothing had happened.

I've had enough. I've written her a letter to tell her all of the above and to tell her that I'm sick of giving and getting nothing but grief in return. AIBU to send it?

OP posts:
Mintyy · 19/06/2014 09:31

Yanbu

KoalaFace · 19/06/2014 09:32

YANBU. At all. It's time for you to put yourself first.

The only thing I would say is to make your decisions when calm so you have truly thought about what you want.

I'm sorry you've had such a difficult time.

DoJo · 19/06/2014 09:47

YANBU - apart from anything (and if you need to strengthen your resolve at any point!) your sons need to see that you don't deserve to be treated like that. You are clearly fostering a much more positive relationship with them than you ever had with your parents, so why undermine it by allowing yourself to be treated this way? Good luck and stay strong - you may be able to salvage a relationship out of this, but if you can't then at least you know that you tried your best and she didn't appreciate it.

Elllimam · 19/06/2014 10:19

YANBU she sounds awful. I think you would be better off without her xxx

HouseLikeAZoo · 19/06/2014 10:29

Thank you. I keep thinking what's the worst that can happen? And I think it's that I never see her again, which is not actually a bad thing. So I need to just send it

OP posts:
CoffeeTea103 · 19/06/2014 10:35

Yanbu op I feel sad for you that she put you through this for so long. I think the first step is to realize you don't need her approval. Some people are just not cut out to be mothers. You have your own family now, don't put your boys through this as well. The worst that can happen is that you don't ever speak to her again, and ask yourself is that really the worse thing. You have your own family now, so you will never be alone. Send the letter and you will find peace.

bragmatic · 19/06/2014 10:36

Good luck. Have you talked to your brother about it? Not that you need his permission, of course. Just to give him the heads up?

HouseLikeAZoo · 19/06/2014 10:40

I haven't talked to my brother yet (either my real brother or my stepbrother for that matter) but I will. I will also speak to my gran (my mum's mum) who I love dearly and miss so much since we moved to the uk. I am pretty sure my mum will try to badmouth me once she gets the letter so I need to get in first. I think I also need to give my stepdad the heads up? He'll take her side but maybe needs to know that there's a storm coming.

OP posts:
WeirdCatLady · 19/06/2014 10:41

Speaking from bitter experience, I would say that you know what would be in your best interests, and that is going NC. Your mother will never change.
When you start to weaken and consider letting her back on, take strength from thinking of your boys - what are you teaching them by allowing this toxic woman into your life? Would you allow anyone to treat them the way you are letting your mother treat you! Of course not. (This is how I found the strength to go NC with my own family, by thinking of how it would impact on my dd)
It will be hard but I suspect you will feel a great weight has been lifted x

dreamingofblueskies · 19/06/2014 10:47

Blimey, this makes my thoughts that my mum is selfish fade into insignificance, send the letter, she can't go on treating you like this.

TheHoneyBadger · 19/06/2014 11:20

yanbu and naricissists like this get worse with age

MehsMum · 19/06/2014 11:26

YANBU. She sounds horrible. Some people are just blindingly selfish and the only way to deal with them is to tell them where to get off.

ScrambledSmegs · 19/06/2014 11:33

YANBU. I doubt she'll cut you off forever though, you're too useful to her. So you're going to have to remain steadfast, for you and your boys.

Thanks and ((((hugs)))) for the child you were, who never got the mother she needed, let alone deserved.

cuddybridge · 19/06/2014 11:56

Your DM sounds a little like mine, there is no way that I could go NC, but I have managed very low contact since Xmas. For me its less dramatic than NC so my DM can't go ballistic, but the peace is lovely.
You could try this and see if it works for you, NC is always a further option then. Good luck

HouseLikeAZoo · 20/06/2014 21:37

Have emailed her. Now I wait.

OP posts:
Kerryp · 20/06/2014 21:45

So glad you're doing this for yourself, it's a step towards a happier healthier life. She sounds like poison.

hamptoncourt · 20/06/2014 21:54

YANBU. Have you had a nosey on the Stately Homes thread? Lots of us like you on there Sad

I am NC with my mother and it is the best thing I ever did for myself. Be prepared though for what comes next.

If you are really really lucky you will just get a deafening silence, in which case be very grateful.

More likely, your mother will send in the flying monkeys - relatives who will tell you what a crap daughter you are and how can you do this after everything she has done for you etc etc.

Or, if she is anything like my egg donor, you will get The Case Of The Mysterious Illness. This will be veiled in mist, a spurious collection of symptoms that could be depression, cancer, a heart condition, a brain tumour. This is all designed to rein you back in but please don't get sucked back in.

Please believe me when I say that once you have stood up to someone like this, they will suck you back onside just so they can hurt you even more badly next time.

Ignore, ignore, ignore.

Stratter5 · 20/06/2014 22:34

I am NC with my entire family. It is the best thing I have ever done, both for me, and my DDs. My parents and sister are hideously selfish, rude, and deluded people, I don't need anyone like that in my life, and life has improved immeasurably since I went NC.

gertiegusset · 20/06/2014 22:39

We are nc with some of DHs family, it is so much better for him especially but also for all of us.
Any contact just always leaves him depressed and upset.
You get to an age where you just can't keep trying, the effort and the resulting upset is not worth it.

EverythingCounts · 20/06/2014 22:43

Definitely YANBU. Do tell your gran and the other people before she slags you off to them. And think seriously about changing/blocking numbers.

Corygal · 20/06/2014 22:45

YANBU. She's a nasty narcissist.

Your DCs won't benefit from knowing her either.

I dread to think what she'll have you doing for her in her dotage unless you put a stop to the worst of her madness for now.

PrincessBabyCat · 20/06/2014 22:53

YANBU.

My FIL is (or was) like this and would only contact us when he needed something. He's shaped right up since DD was announced though, and been on his best behavior so we don't deny him contact with his only DGC (not that we would). We're skeptical about how long this will last, but so far he has been going on about a year, so he might have actually shaped up. It did take a bit of a blow up between him and DH though to sort things out like this, and a blunt if he wanted to be a grandfather then he needed to step up and be one.

Your mother needs to know what she is doing is unacceptable. If she really needs you as she says, she'll shape up. But otherwise, if you want to go NC that's a good idea. Some people don't deserve second chances.

Hissy · 20/06/2014 23:05

Be prepared that she may not respond.

Why would your feelings register with her now, if the only person she has ever given a shit about is herself.

You've said your piece, don't expect any validation, reaction, and never ever an apology or change.

What you have sent is a game changer. She won't accept it, and may go NC with you.

We'll be here to hold hands, listen and pick up the pieces if that's what you need. Stately Homes is the thread for those of us with shitty families. We 'get' you. It's ok to feel as you do.

Well done for realising a lot sooner than many of us. (((hug)))

HouseLikeAZoo · 20/06/2014 23:20

Thank you all.

I'm shocked to say that she has replied already - and she has said that she's sorry, that she loves me, and wants me to tell her how to fix things.

I have no idea what to do with that. I was expecting wrath and I was braced for that. But remorse? Never saw that coming. Doubt it's genuine, but how to respond?

OP posts:
Stratter5 · 20/06/2014 23:25

Do you want to respond? You don't have to, if you don't want to, particularly if you think it's just manipulation.

Apparently, I am extremely selfish, as I was going to look after her and my stepfather when they get old(er). Or so I've heard through the grapevine. Hmm