Oh fucking hell

[EleanorHandbasket]

The two and a half yr old keeps saying this.

I thought it was that when he said it (in context!) last night, but he's just said it again while looking for a toy.

'Wheres my train? Oh fucking hell, I've lost it'.

Oh fucking hell. What do I do, other than curb by potty mouth and try to ignore it?

Have nearly choked with laughter! Of course, the worst cases are in the car - DH does not realise what's coming out of his mouth when driving - meanwhile the sponge in his car seat is storing it up, in context.

My four year old has learnt the phrase "shut up" from school and no matter how we deal with it (ignoring, distraction, telling off), he says it about fifty times a day. Were hoping he just grows out of it!

Dh never swears around the children, ever. I only have myself to blame here.

My dd, whilst a toddler at nursery, turned up with a few scratches on her arm. The nursery manager asked her if her beloved cat had been scramming her again, and cue her brilliant answer...

"Yes, but only because I kept pissing her off"

I'd take swearing over my 'racist' 21mo any day. He loves In the night garden' and particularly the Ninky Nonk. He thinks buses are the same and shouts 'look a Nig Nog' when he sees one. He also has a bear which sits on a log. We named him Loggly Bear. Which when DS says it comes out as 'Woggy Bear'. I was actually relieved the other day when he only said 'shit' in the shops.

my dd is full of funnies

when she was 3 we had moved into our first house with stairs and she did something ( i cant remember what it was) but i saw red and thought i was going to kill her... i didnt want to hurt her or repeat the mistakes my parents made.... and i needed to calm down

so i shouted... get up those stairs and get into your room and think about what you have done....

and off she went.

after about 20 mins i started calming down and did that internal dialogue stuff...and started to feel guilty for screaming at her and got up to aplogise to her for shouting and explain rationally what she did wrong

so i went to the bottom of the stairs, just as she got to the top of the stairs...

she said....Mummy! I've had a think about it, and you owe me an apology!

that was the one and only time she has ever answered back!

My DS1, from age around 2.5 - 3.5 referred to parking spaces as "fucking spaces" as in, "Mummy, are there no fucking spaces again today?" (we live in a town which gets overrun with tourists in summer). No amount of correcting helped.

When my niece was little, TISWAS and Lenny Henry were very popular on TV.

This meant that whenever she saw a black man, she pointed and excitedly exclaimed "OHHH KAAAY!"

My Dsis didn't know where to look!

Not really in the same league, but after a bit of a a European trip, my then 6yo DD told her Aunt that the best thing about the holiday was seeing the television sex.

After quite a long discussion we established that she meant television SETS - seen at Walt Disney Studios. Phew.

When my dd was about two my mum gave her a biscuit. She just took it so I asked her what the magic word was. she looked at me, coyly fiddled with her leg and gave me a long look...

"Is it bollocks?" She asked.

Ace thread. Actual audible mirth @ Suzyb

Potty Mouthery is hereditary down my maternal line. There's scant hope for the Prulet I'm currently brewing.

DS came home from nursery a few weeks ago and all afternoon he ran around the garden yelling ¿que fas? coño = what the fuck are you doing?

He's 2.6.Thanks, nursery

Is it bollocks?
^^

DS1 used to say For Fucks Sake all the time when he was 2. Is possible he got it from me... We ignored it for a while, like the good advice says, but it kept happening, and in the end I just told him that he shouldn't say it as it wasn't a good word. And he never did it again amazingly.

I know it's wrong but I am giggling at some of these.

My pfb dd1 at 20ish months was trying to put a puzzle piece in and couldn't cue a clear as day "fuck sake" and a big sigh. I was half mortified and half impressed that she'd used it in context .

Unfortunately it turned into her favourite phrase for a few months. The only thing that worked was telling her firmly that it was naughty whiletryingnottolaugh-- and then ignoring it and trying to watch my language. She slowly started saying it less until finally she stopped.

DC had a lengthy debate about whether Fister is swearing. Against: 'it sounds like a normal word about fists' Against; 'but Daddy said it to another driver when we were coming home'.

I had to decree that I have No Idea but better not repeat it just in case.

Whatever you do, don't sound shocked or tell them off, DD heard someone yell 'you're a fucking cunt' whilst walking through town one day, asked me what it meant and I stupidly said 'it's a really horrible thing you must never ever say to anyone' a few days later we were round my mum's for lunch and DD pipes up with 'Grandma, what's a fucking cunt? mummy won't tell me'

My DS2 is a nightmare, I've got an awful potty mouth but the older DC never copied so I've become complacent about swearing in front of them. DS has so far told the childminder the other minder was "a right pain in the arse", he was very concerned the other day because my mums rabbit was locked in his cage so he jumped up & shouted "oh fucking heck who locked her in there" always completely in context too, I'm trying to curb my language now!

Children swearing is hilarious when they don't know what they are saying.

DS now tells me and DH off if we say a "bad word" He's heard most of them through minecraft videos.

I do remember my little brother aged about 18 months, as we drew up to a big traffic jam sweetly saying "Ohw, shiiiit!" and my stepmum hissing "Don't say anything, don't laugh, don't react" while me and my sister (both teenagers) were trying really hard not to giggle audibly or catch anybody's eye.

He swears all the time now but only on facebook...

*I've got a three year old that spent the whole trip around today asking me

'what the Fuck is that*

Spat my tea out PMSL!!!

My DS went through a habit of saying 'oh shit' - totally in context as well, eg if he dropped something. I ignored it (well, chuckled to myself) made more of an effort to not say it in front of him and now he only says it if he is in earshot of me or DH saying it!

My dd has taught ds aged 2 to say "alright hold your tits" when someone calls his name!!!

He does also say 'fucks sake' on occasion but that's my fault.

Reading all these I've been lucky so far that my three don't seem to have absorbed the ones I've slipped when driving!

I have always made a point of reacting with exaggerated mock horror at words such as "poo" and "fart" with the result that today the older two think they have been terribly naughty teaching nearly-two-year-old to say "bum"! Peals of giggles on the school run today. Since then DD3 has been randomly shouting "BUM BUM BUM!" with great glee.