To ask what is your instinctive response to hearing a child is Home Educated?

[NickiFury]

I am really interested to hear general opinions from everyone and hoping for some from professionals such as teachers etc. I really want to know what people think because in the main in RL, the response is overwhelmingly negative. I've had people threaten to call SS on me because ds isn't in school, been told it's "weird" and seen this face a lot.

Now to me home education is a totally normal thing but I suspect this is only because we are immersed in this world and know lots of other HE families (you'd be surprised how many are out there).

What has made me think about this was a friend telling me today that people in our community know of me and ds without ever having met us because we are notorious as that woman who doesn't send her kid to school .

Btw I also have a child who does go to school and is doing well but no one seems to gossip about that.

So what would YOU think if you someone told you their child is home educated?

Thanks .

Each person's situation is different and I do know that things are not the same in the UK as in the States, but I would have found it harder to home school my child who has severe learning disabilities precisely because I had no training in special education. Luckily for us, he went to a school with a really good special education department (we purposely moved into the catchment area for this school) and where there was social as well as educational support.

I'm afraid my first reaction is uh-oh.

My mother was one of those weird anti-authority fruitcakes, and I only found out far behind I was at 16. I'm still catching up in general knowledge covered in any ordinary secondary school over ten years later.

agree with the poster who said it is controlling parents.
Sadly they have often lost all sense of proportion and even when the kid is right as rain and really happy at school go on to endlessly suggest there are problems which simply don't exist

My response is typical - I don't agree with it unless the circumstances are exceptional, that is if the child will not benefit from normal schooling.

If my child was suffering in his school because of bullying, for example, I would take him out of school, but HE would be a last resort.

Instinctive reaction, as a teacher: 'alternative' and rather other-worldly; sometimes disagreement with authorities: social, educational, medical or just 'no-one tells me how to bring up my family.' Children can flourish, but have difficulties in relating to their peers and can find it difficult to pursue necessary subjects they don't enjoy.

I used to teach environmental science and there's do much you can plan around just one topic magpie. We had to teach cross curricular so it wasn't just actual science but reading and comprehension, practical experiments, maths, art (study of past still lifes, artistic sculptural interpretations) leading to the students doing their own art, either a still life or an interpretation, then a discussion on scientific illustrations versus art (which is more easing, which has emotion and what do the different drawings convey in terms of meaning to you). We would also incorporate energy use and green technologies too. So any learning, in theory, could centre around space, sport and robots for my ds if I was to home ed.

From my posts do you think that is happening in my situation Troy?

Admiration for the parents, lucky children.

In my experience, it's a decision most take very seriously and work hard to do a great job. It's no surprise that many HE children take their GCSEs early and socialisation is covered by after school activities and HE meets. In West Berks, they used to have a dedicated HE support unit at LAuth level as so many parents were pulling their children from state "provision".

Fwiw My ds2 has friends I don't like (both home ed and schooled). I try and keep as much contact with them to group stuff, so he gets to enjoy their company without them annoying me so much . He also comes across plenty of people he doesn't like (he has an arch enemies list - lots of things annoy him!) yet he manages to comfortably share tents with members of this list when he is away on camp, or work with others in groups at workshops, so I assume he has ability to manage it. He also has contact with many children with learning/health/behavioural issues, more than in your standard school. Plus having to make allowances for a much wider scope of ages and abilities, both when learning/working in groups and in play.

Home ed socialising 'when it works' (and I agree it doesn't for some) is probably much more akin to the social skills needed for work.

I am a teacher and I would have no negative reaction at all. It seems obvious to me that HE can, and does, work extremely well. As a teacher of thirty children you spend a large proportion of your day on crowd control. I consider myself an expert on getting large groups of children to do fun and meaningful stuff when they are all in a room together - but I know full well that were I to be working with one or two children we could achieve the same amount in about two hours of the day. I could tailor their learning to their interests in a way simply not possible in a classroom.

Don't get me wrong, I think schools are great too. But not all schools are great and not all children are suited to school.

Okay, so OP asked for candour & I have barely skimmed thread. Many friends & family HE (in different countries, for a variety of reasons in theory), plenty of them are people I respect.

If I meet a new HEr my first response is to think they're probably terribly snobbish about conventional education. Because tremendous snobbery is the true feeling of all the HErs I know, towards school-education. It kind of marks out how much we don't have in common (though we may go on to be friends, anyway).

I suppose I succomb to confirmation bias & also find things in their experience to reinforce why I wouldn't want to HE. But that's a minor thing.

lucky bugger.

My instinctive gut reaction would be to think the mother a bit of a supermum who might look down on me for working and having ds in nursery.
I'd expect the child to be bright and articulate if a little precocious.

I have encountered a lot of HE-ers through my work and know this isn't always the case but often seems to be.

My instant reaction is 'poor kids' tbh.

I do understand that in rare cases where the child has additional needs, HE may be best. But for the vast majority, I think school is, for all of the reasons already given.

no idea - i have never read anything you post

my instinctive response is

is this adult going to turn out to be a nutter? religious extremist? cult member? animal rights extremist? off grider?

or will they be one of the normal ones, with kids with some kind of medical need, or previous issue with bullying, or who the school system has failed in some way

group 1 i will avoid. group 2 i am a tiny bit envious of

oh, I have noticed that HE people can be a trifle rude about school, but I conclude it is because they are always having their position challenged by people who think differently.

I have sometimes been a trifle annoyed by the cliches one or two of them trot out about schools, as undoubtedly they are annoyed by the 'poor children, controlling parents, lack of socialisation' stuff.

Badly behaved is my first thought, sorry. I know that not all home schooled kids are and I know there are good reasons for choosing it, but there is a home schooled group that meet at my place of work and all the kids are badly behaved, seem to have no idea how to behave around other people and the parents all seem to be of the opinion that their little darling should be free to 'express themselves'

"If I meet a new HEr my first response is to think they're probably terribly snobbish about conventional education."

To be fair wouldn't you think the same thing if you met somebody who sent their children to a private school?

First thought? I wouldn't trust the education that child received, I would think that he got a very lower standard of education.

Low

I have to say in my experience, HE kids are FAR more accepting of "different" in that they don't actually seem to notice it. My ds can seem quite quirky and his social conversation is learned rather than instinctive, I have never seen a HE child reply to him with negativity or pull faces or laugh or nudge their mate and snigger. They ALL make conversation with him, let him join in, make allowances that he might need extra time with the instructor etc. it's very different from the stories my dd tells me about what happened in her classroom at school.

Did you learn manners and social skills in a school by any chance TroyMcClure?

my first response is tell me more, as I am considering it, though currently erring more towards school. I know several families who home school, and may be classds as weird by some, but basically just want the best for their kids and are brave enough to go against the norm.