To ask what is your instinctive response to hearing a child is Home Educated?

[NickiFury]

I am really interested to hear general opinions from everyone and hoping for some from professionals such as teachers etc. I really want to know what people think because in the main in RL, the response is overwhelmingly negative. I've had people threaten to call SS on me because ds isn't in school, been told it's "weird" and seen this face a lot.

Now to me home education is a totally normal thing but I suspect this is only because we are immersed in this world and know lots of other HE families (you'd be surprised how many are out there).

What has made me think about this was a friend telling me today that people in our community know of me and ds without ever having met us because we are notorious as that woman who doesn't send her kid to school .

Btw I also have a child who does go to school and is doing well but no one seems to gossip about that.

So what would YOU think if you someone told you their child is home educated?

Thanks .

I'm not being blasé. I'm quite relieved that I haven't had to go through sorting out exams for my lot as they have all gone/will go to secondary school at varying stages. But, I have seen many many families successfully get their children through GCSEs and A levels at home. And your bitterness about your mother and your lack of qualifications seems to want to ignore the fact that lots of people actually do really well at it. I don't like to see their efforts being dismissed or belittled.

Kim and Larry, re learning/progressing/measuring etc:
Firstly, I must say that I was never particularly interested about measuring my kids against others.

But, it's actually really easy (or at least I found it so) when you have a child with you for large amounts of time, to see whether they are bored or engaged. And at primary school level certainly, I don't think it matters really what they are engaged with. If they're putting effort and thought into something and clearly getting lots out, then that's great. Loads of primary geography and science is just general knowledge, stuff that gets covered by chatting about the world around us.

(My 11 yo hasn't done much in the way of formal science learning, and barely any in the last two years. We went through some science SATs papers the other day and we were both really surprised at how undemanding they were.)

And when you are talking about a topic with a child, or sitting near them whilst they answer questions about it or do some other work on, it's just really obvious whether they have learnt it and understood it. And of course a teacher can't do that with a whole class, so they have to have other ways of assessing.

Mammuzza,

Good post.

While HEing, I found it hard to define myself as 'being a Home Educator', because it carried so much baggage. I come, after all, from a family that Teaches [and yes, that capital T is deliberate - education is a family vocation to a slightly unbalanced degree!] DS and I talked about 'doing school at home', a definition we both felt comfortable with for what we were doing..

With time, and hindsight, and training as a teacher myself, has come a more balanced view - that HE is a spectrum, something that can be done in many different ways, for a short period or for life, that can be dipped into and out of again. I am now proud to say that we HEd. But like many 'minority activities', perceived as somewhat 'fringe' by many, a bunker mentality can prevail, that can be unhelpful both to those in the bunker and those wanting / having to enter it for the first time.

Ah, some more loaded language there!

I'm not particularly bitter at this stage. I am, however, honest. I am not dismissing or belittling people who manage to get the qualifications they require in the required timeframe, and I would have no urge to do so, given I know how hard it is to do fast-track GCSEs as someone who's done it^. Something which very few HEers have done themselves, they just expect their children to do it, and rhapsodise about how easy it is on HE forums.

If you have a look at my posts, and read them, your problem is not that I claim HE never works, but that I pop the little positive balloons of HE with facts. Facts like that five GCSEs is not necessarily enough, for all career choices (I even take care to acknowledge that not all medical schools place an emphasis on level 2 qualifications, for Pete's sake) and that such a low number can still close off doors.

Again, you are forgetting that I was HEed and heard all these ideas about how open the world would be for me years back, and as an adult, I have become rather forced to take a keen interest in how exams and uni admissions procedures actually work.

"My friend HEd her daughter and she got 5 A*s and is doing her A-levels" is going to be something I won't take at face value. I will be asking if she specifically picked those, or whether that was all that was available.

And your bitterness about your mother and your lack of qualifications seems to want to ignore the fact that lots of people actually do really well at it. I don't like to see their efforts being dismissed or belittled.

Right there.

The dismissal via the assignment of "bitter". Which is a flagrant and deliberate minimisation of the full sum of the costs caused to a formerly HEed child via parental choices.

The piority given instead to "dismissed/belittled achievements" of others who oddly enough ... do not represent a "blot on the good name of HE".

How many posts from HEer have asked Tilly questions that would allow them to explore what HE gone wrong/turned out disappointing looks like from the first person/at the sharp end perspective. So they can find out how/why it went wrong and what to be on the look out for themselves. To demonstrate they are willing, ready and open to hearing the perpsective of the (former) child, even when they don't chant "rah rah rah HE is just fabby!".

v

How many posts from HEer have been rather more focused on minimising any "damage" her views/experiences might cause PR-wise.

If any HEer really still does not understand why the gen pub can express the opinion that HE often seems to be more about the parents than the kids, and they feel sorry for some of our children... try reading what is said by HEers and revealed in self defence . Cos the answer is right there.

P.S. Have you thought that maybe I think your posts on this thread dismiss and belittle the ones who actually didn't do really well at it? When I post on this thread, I am not just speaking on my own behalf. I know other former HE children in my town, or similar ages to me. And compared to some of them, I am a success story. At 17, I had more than two GCSE passes, and I would go on to pass my first set of A-levels. I have gained more since. They sadly haven't, and have much unhappier personal lives.

Mammuzza Above post is not directed at you, in case not clear.

Great post, btw.

I agree with Tilly and Mammuzza, those of us who were home educated and have grown up with a sorry tale to tell for it, are not welcome voices.

Describing our experiences and any pain/disadvantages we feel we still carry due to HE is not minimising the experiences of those who have done well, but there is a sense that some people who HE wish we would just shut up and go away.

Its not a nice feeling, and makes me even more suspicious. Surely if some people are being failed within the HE community (and some of us were/are), then it would be better to blow that open and explore the reasons why.

Obviously, there are some who succeed and are happy in HE. Sadly, there are some (many in my acquaintance) who are not.

Instinctive response: how can you afford to home school your child and not be at work? Are you qualified to teach? How competent are you in the subjects you are teaching?

Even in Schools, students do not have the same teacher throughout their school career. It's difficult, if not impossible for one person to be good at all the subjects that children need to learn - teachers tend to be experts in their field.

My mum is a teacher and she just supported the education I was already receiving at school by subject experts.

What is your reason for home schooling? As your other child isn't?

I'm on a roll now, so let's discuss distance learning options.

www.icslearn.co.uk/qualifications/gcses.aspx Strong on Sciences, but if you go from here, you certainly wouldn't be meeting Goviot's eBacc measure. No languages, ancient or modern, no geography or history.

If you want to do a language via distance learning, I believe the best provider is Craven College. Arranging the speaking tests privately is going to be a bugger, and distance learning is a terrible way to learn a spoken language. They charge more for the course which includes 8 hours tutorial time over the phone, than it costs to do an evening course GCSE that includes weekly practice in person with a tutor too. But it's an option. They have a much wider range of language GCSEs than anywhere else.

www.distance-learning-centre.co.uk/productlist/30/GCSE_Courses.htm Offers 5 GCSE courses: Law, Maths, Psychology, Sociology and RE. Strong options, yes?

www.nec.ac.uk/course-categories/gcses-and-igcses Finally! Geography and History! We've also got IGCSE course for French and Spanish. No German though. Naturally not. And certainly no Classics, although hardly any state schools do either. Still, you'd think it would be possible to do ANYTHING via distance learning, as there's no need to have found eight 17-year-olds in Hereford alone, to run the course.

www.edistancelearning.co.uk/igcse-courses/4545591831 Offers 8 options. The only new ones are Business Studies and Economics. Looks likenthey used to offer GCSE German and Italian, but don't now.

Yes, distance learning is great!

I've repeatedly explained why I home educate one child and not the other and if you've picked up on THAT I am not sure how you can have missed the other

Sorry - this is a long thread and I just read the first page, so I missed why you home educate only one. Can you explain again, or just let me know where to look for the answer? There are 34 pages of discussion and I don't have time to read all of it!!

I'm bored now, so I'll stop. Done that search so many times for myself or on behalf of other people.

I would like to clarify that I have nothing against law, sociology, or psychology. However, I happen to know that sixth forms assume no previous knowledge for those A-levels, i.e. that those A-levels do not require the GCSE subjects. So a 16 year old taking those three is not actually opening up any additional options, as she would be if she took Maths, Chemistry, History, German, French, Physics, Geography, and similar.

GCSE Law, Psychology, Sociology just bump up your number. Great if you just need extra GCSEs for your future medical/vet school app but not as part of your only 5 GCSEs.

I'd be up for a debate about how people feel they were failed by HE.

And I recommend the OU language courses (I'm supposed to be doing a L3 German assignment!), if you are a student and need to make up credits. I have thoroughly enjoyed the ones I have taken. Under current uni funding rules, however, they are too expensive to be done for fun.

For those who were HE and hated it, would HE for primary (going to groups, normal out of school sports/drama clubs etc so plenty of social contact) and school for secondary help to prevent the problems you had? If we do end up having to HE (due to lack of primary places), I'd like my DC to enjoy the experience and not be disadvantaged by it.

I completely agree about those GCSE subjects, TillyTellTale. Unfortunately, many comprehensive schools are also offering such subjects and are, thus, also failing their pupils.

Why the exclamation marks? I don't think it's particularly surprising to assume that if you've picked up one important point then that means you've read the thread.

He has autism and other additional needs.

He's been in four different schools inc an ASD unit and none have been able to meet his needs.

He left school aged 8 after a couple of weeks of being restrained daily by up to four adults and coming home covered in bruises and abrasions all over his face and body. Final incident was him having his head repeatedly bashed off a table.

For those who were HE and hated it, would HE for primary (going to groups, normal out of school sports/drama clubs etc so plenty of social contact) and school for secondary help to prevent the problems you had?

Would solve the problems of all the people I know entirely. One person's stark raving fruitbat parents did it the. Other. Way. Around. Results? Diabolical.

To answer the original question posed by the OP, I would wonder why they were homeschooled.

My instinctive response to this thread so far is to remind people that NT is not shorthand for no special needs, children can have either physical or neurological impairments or both. ASD is not the only kind of SN out there.

I managed to get DS entry to reception delayed by a year on the basis of his SN, for that year we did a combination of homeschooling, preschool a couple of mornings a week, when DS was well enough to attend and all the usual therapy sessions. Reception year we did a combination of flexischooling homeschooling, hospital school and therapy around that. This year he is supposed to be at school full time but he is often not well enough to attend.

We had no choice those first two years IMO, what else are parents of children who are too medically fragile to go to a mainstream school but who do not qualify for a place at a special school supposed to do?

Many parents of children who have SN would love to send their children to school but because provision is so woefull they do not have that choice, to homeschool for many means no respite and no chance to work outside the home to help pay for therapy or save for retirement but they do it anyway.

OP you deserve a medal and an apology from your LA IMO.

OP: think you were a little touchy about the exclamation marks. It's only punctuation - I just have a habit of using them sometimes :-)

Anyway... Thank you for explaining the reasons. I think that is very understandable, and I get it - you are doing your best for your child under the circumstances, and that's highly commendable.

I know very little about autism, but are there no specialist autism schools? Not that you're not doing a great job - I just wondered if there was anything out there for parents who couldn't afford to take time off work?

This is a godsend for HE exams and distance learning.

[email protected]

It doesn't present the rosy picture that some people have. But at least you can get ahead of the game so you can roll with changes and issues. And the nasty surprises that can be thrown up AFTER you kid achieves a good grade in an exam.

The wiki is fab. The people who dedicate so much time and effort to collating and sign posting info and resources are just ... well Damehoods all round if I were Queen.

But holy mother of god what a monumental pain in the arse it can be to have to access exams as an external candidate.

If you are in the earlier stages of HE, the exams group is still worth a look. It's a myth buster in it's own right, just based on the sheer volume of information available and I personally found it a steep learning curve, so well worth getting stuck in before you need to when time is no longer on your side.

Cover things like what can affect child benefit and tax credits etc. too.

I think it is fab and frankly would be a sobbing mess threatening to move back home with or without DH if I hadn't found it.

Incognito it's been a problem for schools, but not to such an extreme level. I would be absolutely staggered to find a student from a mainstream school who got A/A*s in GCSE Law, Psychology, Sociology in the summer of year 11 who had not at least sat GCSE Maths, Eng Lang and Core Science that year. They would probably have done Eng Lit, too. I wouldn't be nearly so surprised to meet a bright, articulate HEed young lady who had great grades in those and had taken nothing or little else.

The situation in schools will hopefully have been further improved by the only thing of Goviot that I have ever agreed with since the last election: the eBacc measure for schools.

bronya Speaking only for myself, I think that any combination of regular schooling mixed with homeschooling would have been better than homeschooling alone.

Mainly because we just didn't have any opportunities to socialise outside of a strict adult-orientated setting (just our 'church' meetings), and certainly no socialising with other children our own age.

My parents also educated us according to their world-view, and deliberately skipped or altered entire sections of schooling to what they wanted us to believe, which led to a very confused start in adult life.

Also, we were badly abused, and while I know this can happen while you are going to school as well, we would at least have had a chance to cry for help. For example, my being unable to sit down (with an undiagnosed broken back at the time), for almost a year of chronic agony, and many other abuses that would have been very obvious in a school setting.

However, I think the biggest thing I would have wished for, would simply to have had a choice. My parents simply weren't interested in what we wanted, even when it was just to try school (we begged).

I'm absolutely sure there are some very loving HE parents out there, and children who are thriving under their care. But I also know there are some children who very badly slip through the gaps, and HE (or isolation in particular) takes away any chance they would have had of being helped.

((InAnotherLife))

OP, just wanted to wish you well.

This Facebook group is useful for exam advice for home educators, as an alternative to Yahoo

Home Ed Links UK for IGCSE

www.facebook.com/groups/HELinksUK.IGCSE/

What a horrible experience for you, Inanotherlife. I am sorry to hear of it

The HE groups usually have safeguarding policies but that wouldn't have been of much use to you. Am guessing you weren't known by the LA, though of course visits aren't compulsory, nor is seeing the children (we accept annual visits which doesn't seem to be viewed at all favourably by some who HE)