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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take breastfed DD with me to training?

211 replies

whynowblowwind · 11/06/2014 17:39

I got a job the other day :) but I have to do a course on safeguarding. This lasts about 3 hours from approximately 9-12.

DD is 2 months; she is exclusively breastfed at the moment. I am wondering what to do about this course and wondered if I could just take her with me? It's quite am informal course they said and there will only be about 5 or 6 of us in total.

Alternatively I could ask a friend to have her but she won't take a bottle at the moment and still feeds very frequently.

What's best?

OP posts:
PrincessOfChina · 11/06/2014 18:11

Erm, DH should just do it. He'll just whinge? WTF?

Original poster
whynowblowwind · 11/06/2014 18:12

Figster I've explained about my working hours and DDS a couple of times now but I'll be doing one early morning call and one lateish one - 7 until 8 and 9 pm until 10. So only about 10-12 hours p/w.

I'm hoping I'll increase my hours when dd is older.

OP posts:
ThinkIveBeenHacked · 11/06/2014 18:13

Do not ask a friend when you have a DH.

Winge!?!

Original poster
whynowblowwind · 11/06/2014 18:17

DH WON'T, though - he will just say no, and I can't very well pick him up and make him do it! And I know, I know, he's not very nice about stuff like this but the problem still exists whether he's a prat or not, if you see what I mean, my DH being a prat doesn't change the fact that I have to do this training if I want to work and have no one to have dd.

OP posts:
Chippednailvarnish · 11/06/2014 18:19

I've got a DH but he will just whinge!

I believe that's what known as "Tough shit".

PrincessOfChina · 11/06/2014 18:23

Who will look after DD while you're at work? Presumably not DH who will just refuse and whinge?

All that aside, you should ask a family member or friend. It would be totally unprofessional to take DD with you.

Minorchristmascrisis · 11/06/2014 18:24

I'd ask if it was possible. They can only say no and them you could make other arrangements. I've had people bring their children to training and as long as they aren't disruptive, it doesn't bother me, I'd rather the staff member attended the training with their child than not at all.

Original poster
whynowblowwind · 11/06/2014 18:24

Yes, tough shit ... for ME!

He will say - no, you want the job, you sort it out.

I know he can be an arse but the point is the training here - so the general consensus is to ask friend?

OP posts:
Original poster
whynowblowwind · 11/06/2014 18:25

I don't have any family, DH will watch dd while I work but this would be when she's fed and asleep, at home, sitting in a cafe for 3 hours is different.

OP posts:
magpiegin · 11/06/2014 18:26

What the fuck? He will moan about caring for his own child? Just give her to him and go! Let him winge all he bloody well likes.

raffle · 11/06/2014 18:26

I've provided training within the care sector and I would say 'no' to a baby being present, sorry, totally inappropriate.

Viviennemary · 11/06/2014 18:28

Of course it isn't appropriate. But that's only my opinion. Ask the people running the event.

Shakirasma · 11/06/2014 18:29

Get your friend to mind DD during training, then when you start working proper save every dam penny you can for your escape fund!

Original poster
whynowblowwind · 11/06/2014 18:29

Magpie, I need to be near her so I CAN feed her, we are twenty minutes outside the town where the training is and so if I did just chuck dd at him she'd be starving when I got back.

Someone needs to be with her close by so I can nip out and feed her halfway through.

OP posts:
Original poster
whynowblowwind · 11/06/2014 18:29

Shak Wink

OP posts:
Shakirasma · 11/06/2014 18:32

Best of luck OP x

Weathergames · 11/06/2014 18:32

I would be really pissed off if someone brought their baby on a safe guarding/any training course! Have brought up 3 kids alone and NEVER taken one of them to work - I have no local family either.

Would be totally unprofessional, make you look incredibly unorganised and probably make the other delegates and the trainer very uncomfortable.

GinAndSonic · 11/06/2014 18:33

Id leave the baby with DH, leave some expressed milk, you will gone what, 4 hours? It will be fine. If your DH refuses, well, id be looking to LTB to be honest. He sounds shit.

Xmasbaby11 · 11/06/2014 18:35

Can't see any reason for dh to not do it?

mollypup · 11/06/2014 18:35
Hmm
thenightsky · 11/06/2014 18:38

I think she said she cannot leave expressed as DD won't take a bottle.

GinAndSonic · 11/06/2014 18:42

Apologies, i missed that, but i still think her DH should step up and take care of his child.

Original poster
whynowblowwind · 11/06/2014 18:43

Weather, you know you could JUST have said I would be unreasonable without chucking an additional kicking about how great you are and how shit I am in there.

My DD is very, very young and ordinarily, I would not be looking to work but i DO want this job. I don't not have any local family - I have no family.

And no dd won't take a bottle.

OP posts:
minipie · 11/06/2014 18:44

DH will be at work (and will refuse to take time off) so she can't just leave the baby with him.

OP I think your only option is to beg the friend to come to a cafe, offer to do something similar for her in return someday. (If the training is in someone's house perhaps she could sit downstairs with the baby?) And then work on your DH's attitude. But no time for that at the moment.

I don't think you can bring the baby, really.

Discobugsacha · 11/06/2014 18:44

I would just take her. In a moby wrap or similar. A 2mo bf baby will either sleep or eat and won't distract anybody. An older baby might be a problem but I can't see such a little baby distracting anyone.