For being in danger of pulling a 'Monica' over this party?

[MmmCakeMmm]

First world problems and all that but... at my suggestion a group of friends and I are planning a surprise birthday party for a friend. I started up a Facebook group so we can discuss ideas easily without her knowing.

I've been thinking about this for ages and have lots of ideas but didn't want to take over so I've been consulting everyone and asking what they would like to contribute.

Now, my thing is cakes. I'm kind of known for it and whilst I don't like to blow my own trumpet too often, this is something I'm actually quite good at (so people have told me, it's not just my opinion). But one person has suggested she have her friend do the cake. Now, this wouldn't have bothered me had I not seen the cakes this friend has done and quite frankly, they're shit.

So, before I go all Monica on my friend and relegate her to ice and cups, I thought I'd open myself up to a bit of perspective AIBU style . And before anyone accuses me of having nothing better to worry about, things are actually pretty shit for me right now but have bizarrely manifested itself as worrying about a surprise party. I don't know, I'm not a therapist .

Why don't you say you'll do a cake as well as 'that's what you usually do' then you don't seem like a dick and everyone can secretly marvel at how amazing your cake is compared to the shit one

Or you could say something like you fancy making the cake as a part of your gift to your friend.

I clearly can't read very well as I didn't notice it was a birthday party therefore my suggestion is stupid. Do as Boudica says!

I'd personally make her do cups and ice however, if you're not Monica Gellar I guess you'd better just say that you'd really been looking forward to making the cake and would they mind if you did it or did one alongside the shit other one.

Or in a more comedy style way, make your cake secretly then on the day "accidentally" drop shit cake, but then in true blue peter style present your glorious cake

Warning: people may accuse you of doing this on purpose.

Can you do an oh Gosh I should have said. I kind of assumed I'd be doing it. Do you mind?

Then ask if she wants to do ice an cups.

We'd have to see some evidence of how great your cakes are....

I thought this thread was going to be about Monica lewinsky. I am not sure if I am dissapointed or relieved.

OP, if I were you I would just let the friend of a friend do the cake and not worry about. It. Even if there a bit crap it doesn't matter and it will make your cakes seem more special the next time.

Something like I think she'd be expecting one of my cakes seeing as its my thing.

You may have to relinquish control of something else as a bargaining chip...

Of course it maybe that birthday girl so happens not to like your cakes and mutual friend, knowing this, has tried to head you of at the pass.

This made me .

Ice and cups all the way. YOU are cake lady. The End.

OR you give her the cake making and you do cups and ice Phoebe style!

Make the cups full of amazing cake, have 3 types of ice and snow cones..

I'm possibly way too into this

What?! No flaming?

Thanks for the suggestions all. Unfortunately I left myself open to this by saying 'I'll do the cake unless anyone else really wants to do it?'. None of my friends can bake which is probably why they are so impressed with my cakes I just wasn't expecting this. I mean, I do the cakes. I always do the cakes. I feel like having this woman do it is less personal than if her friends do it and I know this woman also charges for her abominations cakes .

Ok, WIBTerriblyU to suggest a cake that I know is way beyond this woman's skill? I think people will see the funny side . I'll pull a phoebe and take on the cupcakes. Themed cupcakes, cakes in a jar, cake pops, every flavour imaginable. That'll learn 'em. I always do the cakes. I am the cake lady .

As someone who loves cake.... I'd say please do your cake

Just say, you've started planning what cake you're going to make and you're really excited about the party.

Can't you be honest and just say "Sorry what I should have said was that I desperately want to do the cake, so please can I do it?" Or words to that effect

Just wanted to thank you for brightening up my morning, cups and ice all the way I bet I'd love your cake!

Make your cake and let the other woman make her cake.

Then smirk at how much better yours is.

Is friend of friend going to charge for her substandard cake? if yes, say you'll do it for free to leave more money for drinks. Then you can get drunk and be Rachel instead with the cherry pip thing

What's wrong with the other woman's cakes? :o

Oh yes! Be the Phoebe of cupcakes.

Say "okay, well if your friend does the big cake and I'll do some cupcakes..." Mwahahaha!

Or you could be sensible and say "I can do the cake for free if your friend is going to charge, CakeLimelighfStealer" but where's the fun in that?

Are you my RL mate?! I can actually hear her say everything you've written!

Just be honest with the rest of them, you'd really like to do it, and you'd do it for a fraction (if not free) of the cost the abominal-cake-lady would charge.

Oh of course you must do the cake. You're organizing, it's your mate and Cakes Are You. Do as BigArea suggests: come clean, throw yourself on their mercy and say ' to be honest I'd really love to do the cake . Would that be ok?' .

Also note that friend is only suggesting another friend does it, so presumably the suggested friend is not as passionate or interested in the cake baking as you are.

I totally get that throwing yourself into a party is a whole lot better than dealing with the shit that RL throws at us. There are much worse defences (speaking as one who knows). Another reason why you should do the cake. It's OT for you

Just say aww I was looking forward to doing it have a quivery lip going on see what happens

I think you should both do a cake. Say you'd already planned one and got the ingredients, maybe?

And then take a photo of both and submit hers to cake wrecks website maybe? :o

I love a good cakebitchfest. A friend of mine is starting to charge for her cakes and lovely lovely woman that she is, her cakes really are shockingly bad average at best.

What is it with people and cake blindness? Like those tone deaf people on X-Factor who genuinely think they can sing. It must be because people like me don't dare tell them they're actually not that good.

The exact same situation in your OP happened to another friend of mine (only it was a baby shower). In the end she said she'd make cupcakes as 'favours' for attendees to take home so there was no crossover of cake-purpose. In the end her cupcakes were raved over and everyone scoffed them as well as the crappy cake before leaving. As we all know womens' capacity for cake eating knows no bounds, there can never be too much cake. Even crappy cake.