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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

put my dog to sleep?

243 replies

booksandchoc · 09/06/2014 17:34

I am being unreasonable, I feel terrible and I deserve whatever flaming I get.

I've made an appointment to get my little dog put to sleep. I'm tried to rehome him, but all the rescues around here are full, I spoke to the dog warden and he advised in our situation to get him pts.

We got him 4 years ago when he was 2, an elderly acquaintance had him a few months but couldn't cope with him, so we stupidly took him on without knowing his history.

He is aggressive to other dogs, every other dog, he has no recall, he barks constantly whenever we leave him in the house and now he has started snapping at DD. I don't know what else to do Sad.

OP posts:
Arudonto · 09/06/2014 18:53

There are hundreds of dogs in rehoming centres and pounds across the uk who are healthy happy animals without issues. A fear aggressive dog who is snapping at children is not an animal that should be rehomed when we are killing healthy dogs every day for being strays.

Do the responsible thing OP and take him to the vets.A quick injection and he will slip off into final sleep never to be scared or stressed again. Weeks/months/years in a rehoming centre kennels would be cruel.

The dogs trust may not put heathy dogs down...but they keep a lot of very stressed mentally unsound ones alive in their kennels.Very few dogs get to go to sanctuary most end up kenneled until they die. A life in kennels is no life for a dog fear aggresive dog.

A vet will put down an aggressive dog.

Andrewofgg · 09/06/2014 18:53

If the dog's behaviour to the LO is troubling OP then the dog has to go and pts is all there is. Do it, OP, and do it now. I know you will be upset so Flowers but it is the right and only thing to do.

BelleateSebastian · 09/06/2014 19:04

There are plenty of friendly, socialised dogs needing sat in rescue centres that need rehoming. I think you are doing the right thing.

Therewere5inthebed · 09/06/2014 19:08

I totally understand how hard your decision is but the best thing for everyone is to PTS, consider how terrible you'd feel if the dog bit your child. I love my dogs with all my heart but if one showed aggression to one of my children I would not think twice.

Kennels are not a suitable home for a dog aggressive dog, the poor creature would be petrified.

You are doing the right thing without a doubt.

bubalou · 09/06/2014 19:09

I'm not talking out of my arse. We had my dog from a puppy. He has always been nervous and anxious.

When he was a pup he used to growl and bark and attack other dogs and used to try to get to people like he was going to bite them.

We did training and obedience classes and got another puppy so he had a friend. He has been a completely different dog - he is 8 now and since DS came along he has NEVER even looked at him the wrong way.

He is still a nervous and anxious dog - that's not something that goes with away with training but he is now calmer, happier and more content because of the work we put in.

I do completely agree that it's different if you haven't had since a pup. Rehabilitating a dog is extremely hard and I understand if a child is at risk it's just such a shame. Hmm

veryseriousgirl · 09/06/2014 19:19

OP, I really feel for you. BIL had to put his dog to sleep two years ago when he snapped at my eleven month old nephew. As it turned out, he was suffering from arthritis, and it had progressed to the point where his pain medications were no longer effective and the pain was making him behave uncharacteristically.
An older, aggressive dog, even if healthy, will likely end up in a cage for the rest of his life. By taking this difficult decision, you are doing the best you can for your dog and you definitely don't deserve flaming.

todoaboutnothing · 09/06/2014 19:22

bubalou how many dogs have you owned? All dogs are different in temperament and the personality of a dog doesn't always fit the breed.

I've been around thousands of dogs and comparing a situation where you have a dog, that is nervous, to every dog that is nervous, is ridiculous. Humans and animals alike all react differently when frightened, upset or just because it is their nature.

londonrach · 09/06/2014 19:24

Op difficult decision but you know the dog and if snapping its best the dog has a peaceful end. Hugs to your family but your dd comes first

PrincessBabyCat · 09/06/2014 19:27

Yeah, once he starts snapping at children, you can't in good conscience give him to another family. Sad

We gave our dog to a shelter because we couldn't house train him and we couldn't have a dog marking everything and pooping everywhere with a baby. But he was a sweetie, he just is better suited for someone with a fenced yard.

YourDaughterHasaTattoo · 09/06/2014 19:28

Is he insured? If you have insurance there are some trainers who can be paid for on your insurance. You just pay the excess.
This guy is one of them and is very good. He helped us when our dog yapped at everything, became v territorial etc.

www.alphadogbehaviour.co.uk

Hope it works out for you. Very hard decision, but your DD has to come first Thanks

DontPutMeDownForCardio · 09/06/2014 19:28

I'd pts as well. Plenty of other dogs who are waiting for homes who are not aggressive. Yours will more than likely never find a new home and by taking him to a rehoming Centre you're passing the buck. This way you can be sure the dog will not suffer and will meet a peaceful stress free ends. Aggressive animals should not be rehomed except directly to an expert - and there's not many of those homes around!

todoaboutnothing · 09/06/2014 19:36

Totally agree with DontPutMeDownForCardio

newfavouritething · 09/06/2014 19:40

You are being a responsible dog owner, there are far too many people that will not make the difficult decision that you have - that's why rehoming centres are full.
I'm sure all those disagreeing mean well, but they don't have to live with the daily stress or the guilt if someone was injured. A brave decision well made.

Ummmmgogo · 09/06/2014 20:20

Sorry congratulations was the wrong word. I just meant well done on coming to the right decision really. Please be easy on yourself uou really are doing the right thing for yourself, your daughter and the dog. Xxxx

Goldmandra · 09/06/2014 21:27

We had my dog from a puppy.

One dog and you had him from a puppy. Well that really qualifies you to make sweeping judgements about the predicament the OP finds herself in Hmm

Yes, it is a shame. That is why she's turned to MNers as a last resort before she admits defeat and has him PTS.

todoaboutnothing · 09/06/2014 21:32

You are a responsible owner OP. You haven't lied to rescues about his issues just for him to be passed on to new owners and possibly hurt somebody, you haven't given him the stress of being in kennels until they assess him and if found unfit for a home pts anyway. More importantly than that though, you have made the decision and paid the vet bill where as if you hadn't, the rescue would have to front the cash for it when other poorly dogs need it. You have given all you can and although it will hurt, know you did the absolute best thing - you let him go without him knowing any pain, distress or fear. X

DontPutMeDownForCardio · 09/06/2014 21:33

To be honest pts is the only option in my opinion. Im a complete dog lover but you need to do right by this dog and sending him into an unknown situation to face god knows what is a cowards way out of making a very difficult but ultimately right decision. Suggesting tying him to a rescue centre fence is appalling. I've never heard anything quite so irresponsible when talking about re homing animals. They will put him to sleep when they realise he is aggressive and he will have had the confusion and anguish of being abandoned first. Dont let anyone make you feel guilty op.

bubalou · 09/06/2014 22:21

Todonothing

Wow - 'thousands of dogs'. Confused

I'm not claiming to know everything - I've been around dogs my whole life.

I'm very fortunate to be good friends with an amazing qualified dog trainer who I do pack walking, obedience and training with and have done for years.

I'm not claiming to know it all but I have seen her rehome and rehabilitate dogs who have been turned down by everyone else.

I'm not saying this is the case for OP but I'm saying not all dogs in these situations need to be put to sleep. They have feelings, they aren't dispensable.

newfavouritething · 09/06/2014 22:49

But they are dispensable - and vicious dogs are dangerous - how about we get rid of the dangerous dogs and re-home the nice ones? Makes much more sense then 'never put a healthy dog down' - not practical, realistic or sensible IMO.

DontPutMeDownForCardio · 09/06/2014 22:56

Unless you're volunteering to take this dog bubalou why don't you back off? Op had tried to rehome it and she can't - and that's completely irresponsible anyway. It's her dog, her responsibility and you're trying to persuade her to wash her hands of it.

Harry1603 · 09/06/2014 23:00

I don't know where you are but have you tried Battersea? According to their website they take dogs or cats at any time and they wouldn't necessarily put him to sleep as they have animal behaviourists who may be able to help him.

If that's not an option then I agree that sadly putting him to sleep is the best solution for you all.

Gennz · 09/06/2014 23:00

booksandchoc how upsetting for you Thanks

I can't imagine being forced to make that decision - luckily my dog is a total sop - but if for some reason I did have to I would prefer to take himn to the vet and be with him as he went to a painless peaceful death, rather than condemn him to a life in kennels with no one to love him (and possibly end up being pts anyway, without you there). I think I'm going to cry now! Thinking of you.

Gennz · 09/06/2014 23:01

Suggesting tying him to a rescue centre fence is appalling. Totally agree with this DontPutMeDown I am horrified than anyone who considers themselves a dog lover could suggest this.

helzapoppin2 · 09/06/2014 23:10

OP, another vote for don't feel guilty. Sometimes the most practical solution is the right one.

LEMmingaround · 09/06/2014 23:17

Harry batyersea would pts this dog. I had a similar situation with a rottie I had rehomed from them who bit my dd. They said if they took him back he would be pts. As it turned out . The poor thing had bone cancer and bit because she accidentally trod on his foot. I kept him but was looking for a new home as we had a unexpexted pregnancy and the risks were too great. Sadly fate took the decision away from us.

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