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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To refuse to clean the blender?

111 replies

IAmNotACleaningService · 09/06/2014 13:17

DH goes through phases all the time that last for a month or two. It was swimming for a while, and now it's smoothies! Whenever he is in one of his obsessions phases I am expected to facilitate it.

Anyway, when he makes smoothies he uses the blender. And every bloody piece of fruit and drop of milk we have in the house. He then forgets to clean the blender and worktop and leaves a smelly, sticky mess for me to clean up. Our blender doesn't go in the dishwasher as it needs taking apart to clean, and takes ages to do.

He made a smoothie yesterday afternoon and left the blender jug, the blender machine and loads of spilt smoothie all over the worktop. I left it and left it but to be honest it looked gross so I've had no choice but to clean the worktop today. DH then phoned me from work and asked me to wash the blender up because "He'll fancy a smoothie tonight" Oh and can I go and get some bananas and strawberries too?

I told him no to both of the above, and apparently I am being unreasonable because I have Mondays off work. I would wash the blender if it was easier to clean but it is absolutely caked with thick dry smoothie as he didn't even bother to rinse it after use.

AIBU?

OP posts:
ThinkIveBeenHacked · 09/06/2014 13:19

YANBU to refuse to clean it. I wouldnt clean it.

Id respond to the shopping request "ill get whatever you need wheb I pop to the shops but ive no plan to do so today so ill either put Bananas on the ahopping list or you can pick some up.on your way home"

FourForksAche · 09/06/2014 13:20

yanbu, his mess, he should have sorted it out.

FourForksAche · 09/06/2014 13:20

Can't he pick up his own fruit or will the shop be shut?

3littlefrogs · 09/06/2014 13:21

He should clean the blender and buy his own ingredients.
Are you his employee? Servant?
Why should you clean up after him on your day off work?
YANBU.

DuchessofHaphazard · 09/06/2014 13:21

YANBU at all to refuse to clean the blender. His mess, he cleans it. Why can't he wash it up before making his smoothie tonight?

Point your DH in the direction of this though: cleaning a blender in 30 seconds

Have to do it right away, if gunge is all dried on it won't work so well.

Original poster
IAmNotACleaningService · 09/06/2014 13:22

He can easily pick up his own fruit; all the supermarkets are open late or 24 hours in our town.

I did a big shop on Saturday and got 8 bananas and a whole punnet of strawberries and he's had the lot. Every time I go to get any fruit for myself and the kids it's gone! Really pisses me off

OP posts:
wowfudge · 09/06/2014 13:22

Has he ever cleaned it? Tbh they're usually not that bad - he could have put some warm water and a drop of wul in it when he'd finished and it wouldn't have needed much else doing to it. I hate it when someone doesn't clear up after themselves.

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 09/06/2014 13:23

He is a bit slow on the uptake really isnt he? Has no explained to him cause and effect? He makes a smoothie in the blender leaving a mess (cause) so the blender is unuseable for his next smoothie (effect)

Original poster
IAmNotACleaningService · 09/06/2014 13:25

Apparently I'm being awkward, as I always am when I refuse to do as he says.

OP posts:
Original poster
IAmNotACleaningService · 09/06/2014 13:26

It makes me rage that he leaves all the mess on the worktop so I have to clean it all before I can make breakfast and packed lunches.

I've also just had to clean the hob too as he left it fucking filthy yesterday after cooking a fry up

OP posts:
3littlefrogs · 09/06/2014 13:27

He sounds charming op.
Does he have a whole army of minions at work that leap to fulfill his every command?

DejaVuAllOverAgain · 09/06/2014 13:28

YANBU you weren't put on this earth to clean up after him. He needs to start cleaning up after himself and to stop being so selfish as well if he's ate all the bananas and strawberries leaving you and the DC with none.

DoJo · 09/06/2014 13:28

He actually rang from work to ask you to clean the blender? That would piss me off even without the other stuff! Why on earth can he not clean it before he uses it?

3littlefrogs · 09/06/2014 13:29

I think the blender needs to have an accident.
A fall onto a hard surface should do it.

TheLovelyBoots · 09/06/2014 13:30

I would lose the plot if my husband made a smoothie every day. I would probably break the blender to put a stop to it.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 09/06/2014 13:31

Put all the bits of blender in the sink 'to soak'. Leave them.

Buy fruit. Eat it all and leave the peelings and cores on the worktop, just where he would use the blender.

Ask how he likes it.

Paq · 09/06/2014 13:33

YANBU and the whole of Mumsnet will be disappointed in your if you cave and clean the blender.

In fact we demand photographic evidence of an un-washed blender at the end of the day as proof that you stuck to your principles. Smile

Montegomongoose · 09/06/2014 13:34

Why make a battle? Does he do literally nothing to make your life easier?

Sounds like you are pissed off that he has fads.

Do you have time/means to pursue your own interests? Is that what underlies this?

I'm as arsey as the next woman, but it really wouldn't piss me off to this extent. If in at home, I don't mind clearing up. DH does the same when I am working outside the home.

Can you reframe it to be pleased that he's looking after his health? At least it's not foil takeaway dripping tikka everywhere!

shaska · 09/06/2014 13:34

If DH rang me from work to ask me to clean something, unless there was a good reason, an apology, AND a promise to return the favour any time needed, he would get an automatic no and a polite 'have you completely lost your mind?' even if I was on an indefinite holiday and had precisely nothing to do 24 hours a day, let alone if it was a day off from work.

Ilovexmastime · 09/06/2014 13:37

I can't believe he rang you from work to ask you to clean the blender! I'm all for helping each other out and acting like a team, but if I'd spoken to him before about cleaning the blender after using it and he'd ignored me, then he would have got a very short reply from me.

Tell him to put some water in it after he's used it, press the blend button and then pour away that water before adding more and leaving it to soak if HE wants to clean it later.

PuppyMonkey · 09/06/2014 13:37

If/when he leaves the blender in a mess again, just pick it up and put it somewhere out of your sight ( garage? Shed?) and don't even acknowledge it. If he wants another smoothie, he can deal with it then.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 09/06/2014 13:37

im actually amazed that a grown man went to work, thought, oh i might fancy a smoothie later and then thought it was appropriate to phone his wife to ask her to buy the sodding fruit and clean the blender.

Who thinks like that?

CharmQuark · 09/06/2014 13:37

Hopefully he will soon get diarrohea from drinking so much pulped up sugary fruit and the craze will lose its appeal.

Calling you and asking you to clean the blender is outrageous.

Icimoi · 09/06/2014 13:37

Of course YANBU. If he made his smoothie yesterday afternoon, he had the whole evening to clean up, and it would have been much easier before all the gunk dried onto it.

If he thinks you are being awkward, point out that he is being a lot more awkward in not cleaning up after himself.

Do you have Mondays off because you work part time or because you work a weekend day instead? Either way, I assume you have plenty of better things to do than clear up after him, and he needs to have it absolutely clear that the mere fact that you are not in work does not make you his servant.

Ilovexmastime · 09/06/2014 13:38

I like your style Coffeethrowtrampbitch!