to wonder WHAT exactly it is about a breastfeeding mother that some find offensive?

[MistressDeeCee]

www.itv.com/news/london/2014-06-06/breastfeeding-mother-in-tears-over-barrage-of-verbal-abuse/

Also I would really disagree that 'society' pressures women into feeling that FF is the 'normal' or 'acceptable' thing to do - anyone who's had a child in the last ?10/20 years will have had the BF message loud and clear

24 years ago in my case and huge pressure from all health care professionals concerned to bf despite it clearly not working out and a very depressed mother.

Mollypup, I see you're displaying the same calm, well-thought-out approach to my comment as you do breastfeeding - me not agreeing with you, hell, everyone not agreeing with you doesn't mean you're not welcome on MN. It just means that people don't agree with you on this particular subject. You'd be a lot happier if you thought about why that was, exactly, instead of looking daft bleating on as though you're being ceonsored or ganged up on.

Incidentally, breast milk has anti-bacterial properties, so the notion that it could contaminate the water in a swimming pool (that beacon of public hygiene!) is ridiculous.

And breastfeeding is being mindful of other people - it's being mindful of the most vulnerable and needy members of society: babies.

Babies are humans with rights too, I don't know if you've heard. Their right to feed is a leedle bit more important than the rights of a grown person ridiculous enough to be offended by the sight of a breast in a non-sexual context.

Can we stop with the stupid term "menz"?
See it on the feminist boards a lot. Plural of man is men, not menz.
Hate them if you must, but using stupid baby made up words doesn't add any gravitas to the argument

Totally agree with Princess - the only place that might actually be unsuitable would be somewhere that was dangerous, where obviously you wouldn't be wandering about or sitting down for a cup of tea, baby or no baby!

Like saying silly things like feminists hate men adds gravitas to your argument, dementedma... ?

I don't have an argument. I was just asking why people use the made up term " menz". What is it supposed to signify?
Genuinely interested in the reasoning behind this

Babies are being fed!!! Hooray!

Who cares if it's breast or bottle? They're being fed!

It's just a piss-taking thing to signify when a large quantities of men are being idiotic, or when women are pandering to them in ridiculously internalised sexism-style ways (which is taking the piss out of the women doing it), like the whole 'you know what men are like' bullshit that gets trotted out about stuff like housework, or remembering birthdays, or something. That's how I perceive it being used.

It's just a bit of fun, it's not some sinister misandrist hate-term.

A couple of years ago I saw a thread on the Student Room that was very similar - the usual tired old stuff about BF in the loo, BF being disgusting, women should cover up etc. As I read through it, I noticed that one poster was strongly arguing in favour of BF, using very similar ideas to mine, but written in a very clear and concise way. Kept reading and then realised.

That poster was my younger son :)

That's fab Gurl! Bet you're v proud

Aww Gurl, that is the loveliest thing I have heard all day!

I BF both my babies wherever and whenever they needed to. Not once was I hanging my boobs out for all to see. In fact I've never saw anything other than the back of a baby's head when I have seen others BF.

I never experienced any negative comments, looks etc during my time BF, and I fed them both till at least 12 months.

There is no need for other people to react in this way about BF, it's completely ridiculous.

The whole breastfeeding in public debate is rather new, what on earth did people do before?!

I was feeding DD2 in a cafe once, an elderly man and his wife remarked that it was lovely to see a baby being breastfed as was common when they were young.

Aw, you must have been so proud, Gurl. Did you tell him you'd seen it?

What makes me laugh is the lack of outrage from the anti BF dickheads at the sight of a completely exposed pair of breasts on Page 3. Do they gasp in horror, avert their eyes and tut when confronted with a NATIONAL FUCKING NEWSPAPER displaying nipples and everything? No they do not. Because they are twats. Breasts are designed to feed babies, get over it. Go sign the No More Page 3 petition if tits on display bother you that much.

I may pop on Student Room again and suggest that those with an issue with seeing breasts sign the petition, Aradia

What Aradia said. I am looking at you Mollypups

^Babesh completely unnecessary and downright rude. Where exactly have I disagreed with breastfeeding being a legally protected right?

So by your logic, to have an opinion you must have experienced it for yourself? I don't think that's the case I'm afraid!^

Molly -You suggested you might feel differently when a parent. I agreed that you might. I do not think that everyone must experience something to have an opinion on it though I do think experience can bring changes to opinion. There are, of course, some who lack the emotional intelligence and skills of reflection to be able to genuinely engage with imagined experience or to develop their opinion despite experience...

Molly you believe that there is a tone and place for bf appropriately, the law says you can bf anywhere you can ff, anywhere you can have a baby. There is a contradiction between the law and your belief. That doesn't make you against the legality of bf but it's people who think like you who have necessitated legal protection for bf mothers. Whilst you might do nothing more than raise an eyebrow, chat with your friends when the challenging bf mother left her friend's front room then gossip about her on the internet some people would harass the mother directly or ignorantly point out how she could moderate her behaviour to suit their feelings.

I appreciate that pointing this out is inconvenient to the feelings of those people who can't breastfeed, won't breastfeed, or are breastfeeding and not happy about it, but the NHS doesn't tend to prioritise protecting the feelings of adults when it comes to campaigns promoting healthier choices for children.

Of course it's healthier. So is making your own baby food instead of buying jarred stuff, but I still see people using Gerber. In the long run though, the difference between the two is minimal at best.

Guilt tripping mothers into BF isn't the way to go about encouraging more breast feeding. I don't know how it works in the UK, but here in the US, we get bombarded with it, and then get no support. No one really knows how to do it, and all the classes make it sound so easy so that when you can't you feel cruddy that you can't so a seemingly simple task.

Not to mention most women do feel awkward feeding in public. Yes, there's lots that have the guts to go and whip a boob out in the middle of a crowd, and bless them for that. But a lot of women (myself included) feel incredibly self conscious about people staring. Most women breast feeding are older, more confident women. I don't see very many young moms breast feeding in public.

There needs to be a better attitude than "Breastfeed because I say so!" from doctors.

Princess I was 31 and I hated the idea of breast feeding in public. I don't think I ever did it. I was so tired I hardly left the house anyway.

I only lasted 3 months and hated every minute of it. I found it revolting. Nothing to do with breasts being sexual, producing milk simply disgusted me. I hated leaking milk and I didn't like the smell. It made me feel less than human.

On top of that the rush of oxytocin made me feel sick, I was exhausted the whole time, I had mastitis and it was very painful.

I've said before on here the professionals who were supposed to be helping were simply judgemental. The only advice I got was I wasn't trying hard enough. HV refused to advise on how to introduce formula even although she knew I wasn't coping and I was going back to work full time.

Anyone that thinks there's a "time and a place" to breastfeed has never held a hungry screaming baby. Sometimes when my son has been sleeping he wakes up crying hungry, no warning signs, and I'm not gonna let him cry in my arms when I could move my shirt slightly and stop him crying, who would?!

I breast feed in my own home in front of all my relatives, my friends, my DH's relatives and my DH's friends. If any of them felt uncomfortable they didn't look it or say anything. They were all polite enough to look away during the attachment process but once DS was on and feeding the conversation would resume as though nothing was going. There was no way I was going to hide away upstairs to do something so completely natural.

I had to publicly breast feed for the first time when DS was 9 weeks and it was in the middle of a very large and very full GP waiting room. My GP appointment was running late and DS was getting really irritable and then the crying started! I knew he wanted feeding and the choice was either I feed him or let him scream the place down for however long it would take for me to see the GP. I was nervous about doing it but I proceeded to feed him and I think most people were just glad of the silence!!

I was out for a family meal a few nights ago and DS started screaming as he was hungry. My mom said, "Is there anywhere you can go to feed him?" I told her I had no reason to go anywhere and was quite happy to feed him right where I was sitting

No sorry I'm still standing by what I said.

There is benefits to bf yes, but the outcome is at the most minimally different if not at all different to babies ff fed.

I bf dd to 12 months, my great nephew was ff. absolutely no difference in health, weight in our children.

The horrendous pressure my niece felt under to try an bf was ridiculous, I'll say to you what I said to her when she was sobbing because some twat of a midwife had berated her for not 'trying hard enough'

' look there is absolutely nothing wrong with formula, I was brought up on it, so were you, so was the entire family.

Are we Ill? Stupid? Poor health? Overweight ( well yes me a bit but that's due to cake not ff)

Studies say all kinds of shit, it generally doesn't mean anything. There are sick and healthy bf babies, same as ff babies.

Now cheer up and pass me the bottle'

As you can see I am very scientific

But seriously why keep insisting on much better bf/ ff feed is. In the end it makes sod all difference.

Those of you keep ramming bf down everyone's throats we get it. You want to feel superior, like you are the ones doing the best for your baby and that's lovely. But get off your high horse. It not some magic power, and in real life, not studies, it doesn't turn your baby into an all infection/ disease battling super child

And everyone who insist bf is disgusting, well now you are just weird aren't you? Don't like it, then don't look. Agree with pp bet you think nothing of pg 3, because after all that's the natural function of boobs isn't it.

Seriously, with you two groups arguing against each other no wonder so many women feel attacked for their choices.

Health benefits aside (we can agree to disagree Lexus) I reckon a lot of women do it just for the pure convenience of it

When I was having lots of trouble with BF and couldn't get my screaming baby to attach at some silly hour of the morning, I caved out of exhaustion and amidst the tears I told my DH to go and make up a bottle (we had back up formula in case of situations like this). By the time he eventually reappeared I'd manage to get DS attached and feeding.

However, I appreciate there are ways around that now with pre-made bottles and gadgets to even prepare and heat them the 'inconvenience' of Bottle feeding is much less now.

I hate breastfeeding in public, I would love to avoid it, but I don't think it would be fair to make my three year old boy stay home for an entire year, nor to make my baby daughter scream until I can find somewhere suitable to hide

So I get on with it, when necessary, whereever we are. I have fed in all manner of places, at church, in a cafe at a secondary school (where ds goes swimming), in pubs and restaurants and coffee shops, on trains and in hospitals and at a law firm and in a glass fronted meeting room at an investment bank (didn't want to but no choice,dd was screaming!). I have only ever received one negative reaction and that was from a man walking past with his wife when I was feeding my daughter in a children's playground

Most of the time, actually, I think people don't care/dont notice.

I think the best thing we can do is just quietly get on with it whenever we need to. It was seeing my friend breastfeed in public with her first that gave me the confidence to this time round (with ds I just basically became a recluse until he was weaned)