to ask what is the most trivial reason you have ended a relationship

[BauerTime]

Mine is for referring to the 69 position as 'summer of 69ing' and condoms ss 'rubber johnnies'.

It just made my skin crawl and there was no coming back from that!

He told me I was 'better' than him cos I'm a vegan and he was 'only' a vegetarian. Weird.

My decision was vindicated when I feigned a headache and he offered to take me to the chemists... for condoms.

He held his spoon in a fist like a toddler. It used to put me right off my food when we ate together. He also licked his knife in a restaurant. Awful.

Totally adoring all of these.

Blow your nose and look at it. Goodbye forever.

His weirdly spaced teeth.. (no actually it was because he was really jealous..) but i hated his teeth from the word go ..

I've only had 3 relationships and they've dumped me . I should have dumped DH1 but the reasons weren't trivial.

Bad table manners, first date climbed out of window in bathroom abandoning coat and bag to get away

Turned up for second date wearing wooden clogs. Bin.

He used to call me his 'wifey' in an affectionate tone. I was 19 ffs!

His jumper sleeves were too short.

His jumper sleeves were too short.

He was really hot clothed. Perfect body. After a few dates we went back to his but he took his top off and I could see very slight stubble from where he shaved his chest and it totally turned me off. I felt quite freaked out looking at it, no idea why. Made some excuse and fled.

Shaved armpits.

Guy 1 - didn't want to walk to the tube as the ground was wet and his DM would be upset if he got his shoes wet (he was 30)

Guy 2 - kept his remote controls in a plastic wallet at all times

Guy 3 - was called Kirk

Guy 4 - used to eat 40 McNuggets after the pub every weekend

Guy 5 - told me not to wear cardigans

I dumped a boy because I had a dream that he stood on my radish patch. (Not a euphemism).

Food and gardening are important to me!

Guy 6 - had a tantrum because by end of date he had bought us 2 drinks and I had only bought us 1

When I was 17 I finished with someone because my mum said something mildly critical about him and I did my stroppy teenager routine and said, "Oh, well you clearly want me to finish with him so I will." She begged me not to (at least not because of that - she thought he was boring but didn't want to be the cause of us splitting up) - so of course I argued myself into a corner and finished with him just to prove a point. I never told him the real reason and we remained sort of friends and came close to getting back together a couple of times - things didn't really feel final until we both went to different universities.

He said lol out loud.

Misuse of apostrophes

Giant foreskin and delayed ejaculation

Too vain so I could never see myself in the mirror before a night out

3 different blokes.

Got rid of one because he pointed with his middle finger instead of his index finger I know it's rude to point but still...

Got rid of another because he had practically no body hair. He didn't shave he was just hairless in a pre pubescent way and it was most unnerving being they hairy one in a relationship.

My friend dumped someone because she couldn't stand the noise he made when breathing.

He sat down to pee. He also asked me "Can we play Hun?" in a really weird voice as some sort of foreplay.

He was a twat in other ways too, I ran for the fucking hills. Still gives me the skeeves now.

I once dumped somebody completely lovely because he wanted to take me to the Reading festival in his VW campervan.

Wtf was I thinking?

He borrowed my ipod without asking.
He kissed weird
He shaved his chest
He had ladylike hips
He was too keen

at ladylike hips. Love it.