to ask what is the most trivial reason you have ended a relationship

[BauerTime]

Mine is for referring to the 69 position as 'summer of 69ing' and condoms ss 'rubber johnnies'.

It just made my skin crawl and there was no coming back from that!

That would be 20 years older, not 220.

I knew a guy at work who had a £100 limit - if the girl hadn't put out by the time he'd spent £100, he dumped her! Charming.

I once kicked a guy out half naked when I realised that he had blonde pubes. Not sure why, it just really turned me off.

He was a 33 year old virgin.

Made a cup of tea in a glass.

Mixing the chilli and rice together on the plate so it was all smooshed up.

Looked like a crow.

Scraped his heels on the pavement when walking.

Wanted me to give him the money for a hotel room so he could look like he was paying and also had some weird idea about me acting like a prostitute leaving his room. WTF?!?

Rude to waiter.

Wore moon boots in a nightclub.

Told me I should smile more.

orange I dumped someone for the exact same reason!! Wonder if it was the same guy. He also had a red pair of briefs. Ugh.

He ate only two kinds of vegetables: peas and carrots. A non lover of broccoli is no lover of mine.

1. Wore a hairy green suit to our first date. Asked me what my favourite food was and took me to the el cheapo restaurant he'd been planning all along (I was 15).

1. Turned up at the shop I worked in without a shirt. He had a nice body but - no way.

1. He was bad in bed - clearly had watched a lot of porn and thought that was how all sex was. He also wouldn't eat foreign food.

His name rhymed with my name.

I just felt like such a twat introducing him to anyone. Shame really cos I really liked him.

Danced like Rick Astley, with added finger snaps.

At moment of passion where he took his clothes off to ravish me......

paused to fold up his underpants and put them on a chair.

I was 15, he was lovely, but his surname didn't go with the name I'd already picked out for my first daughter. Actually, he probably would've been a better choice than the correctly-surnamed but emotionally frozen one I went on to marry. I wish I'd been a bit pickier on the lines of the posts above.

Cabbages ah no, two different vampires then. Shame. Wish we could introduce them so they could sit there brooding at each other.

I'd have liked a vampire when I was a teenage goth

I'd still take Eric Northman. But even for him a tapestry would be too much

He told me to wash my dressing gown when we were on holiday. Said dressing gown was eight hundred miles away at home at the time. He'd clearly been thinking about it for days.

He had nicely manicured fingernails.

He was just very fuc*ing irritating!!

He sang to me on the phone. Bleugh

I also had a boyfriend who turned up in bright yellow trousers and a fluorescent yellow t-shirt because I'd told him the previous day my favourite colour was yellow....wtf?!

He soon found himself dumped!

No1: He refered to sex as "boinking".

No2: I didn't like his carpet. It was purple and just all kinds of wrong.

No3: I can't remember, but he was pissing me off for a while.

He had a terrible, awful, mortifying, strangled-donkey-blowing-its-nose sounding laugh, and we ran out of serious movies to go see on dates.

Also, in spite of me being a sure thing, and staying in my bedsit more than once, he never tried it on with me. He slept on the floor instead!

Dumpsville...

I was 14.

We got on the bus and when the conductor came round (yes, I really am that old) he said..."two to the terNimus please".

TerNimus??

I ended it that evening.

Not a relationship - only a first date, but I couldn't arrange a second because he kept referring to his children as his 'kiddiwinks'.

Whether or not Paul Scholes should play for England again.....clearly there was more things wrong in the relationship but that actually was the row that ended it!

He didn't water my hydrangea when I went away for a few days-well, that was definitely the start of the end.