To think that a posh accent is still frightening to many people?

[MrsWinnibago]

I know this will be a bit of an offensive post to some people but I don't mean to be offensive...I'm just really interested in people.

On another thread, a user of MN was advised to get some support in seeking help for her DC with undiagnosed difficulties the poster had found her GP to be useless and dismissive... and the advice was to "Get someone to go with you...the posher and bossier the better."

And I thought but then I thought yes...she's probably right. A really posh accent and the authority which often goes alongside it, is a bit frightening to some people...they're easily cowed by a public school stance and attitude.

Then I thought about how long it's been since we had "gentry" and peasants but really not that much HAS changed as the fear of the "gentry" is still deeply embedded in the working people of this country...and in the middle classes to some extent too.

When I say "Posh" I mean REALLY posh....not a middle class chap who doesn't drop his H's....I'm not especially cowed by really posh folk...I've been around them a lot due to my work....but they do seem to have an innate ability to take charge of a situation don't they?

Who is your last post to Nigella?

'As I said earlier, of course people with ordinary accents can appear to be confident etc. BUt it's what those with a really posh accent get for free...just by dint of their vowels.'

I think you do have a point there. I don't think it's fear it induces, but respect. Certain accents do get immediate respect, and other accents are received with a lack of respect unless the person ups the confidence and authoritativeness of their approach, as it isn't seen as automatically there.

I also agree that some people are raised to feel embarrassed about their accent, or to behave with deference to those with 'posh' accents, or in certain roles such as doctors, teachers and so on.

I'm a working class oik with no sense of inferiority and I've always got along fine. I will use different tones of my accent in different situations, for best effect. I'll take it down when speaking with some people who might be intimidated otherwise or who I think will respond better (my 'matey' voice) and bring it up in official/work situations where I want respect.

The very fact that I think of my accent going up or down, rather proves your point. One accent shouldn't be better than another, but in the real world, it does make a difference.

fridgepants 'afters' is dead common you need to say 'pudding'

Jesus Christ. Kate Middleton is posh to nearly every one in the country. I am called posh and I am considerably less well connected than her.

Green eyed induced snobbery is vile.

People do pre-judge you on your accent , for good or bad.

A serviette is the cloth that a waiter has over his arm. A napkin is what you will find at the table.

IdeasGame what?

At the risk of sounding like a complete arsehole I actually think having a posh accent or being at the very least well spoken and clear is worth more than many qualifications when it comes to interviews and so on. I think it wins people over and makes then have confidence in you.

I am the posh one in my family. I had a full scholarship to a very good independent school in London and as a consequence I now have a very "posh" accent. My husband (and 11 year old dd) always enjoy teasing me as apparently I become posher the more outraged and annoyed I become about something, for example if I believe a shop should have refunded me or something like that.

As a result my dh and my mother always ask me to do things like return items to shops or complain about a service as apparently I am very good at getting results.... !

I went through a stage where I worked part time in a very rough pub in south London and I became known as the posh girl.

I'm not really posh though. I just sound it :)

I have absolutely no need to be green eyed, I was merely pointing out that she is not posh. That is the discussion under way, isn't it.

I hope you're not accusing me of green eyed snobbery! I'm far from green eyed about all this....no, my feelings and thoughts on the subject are coming from a much more complex place than that!

oh it was to fridgepants great nick

I can't tell the difference between the "Morningside" accent and a Southern English one.

Have you seen the film Salmon Fishing in the Yemen? Ewan McGregor's accent is distinctive and different from all the other actors' accents, and it is pure Morningside.

Personally I dont find them intimidating - I have worked around a lot of posh people: hopelessly sheltered life, narrow vision and not too bright was my overall opinion. And hopeless snobs. One glance at me and my outwardly middle class (inwardly working class to the bone) exterior and i got treated well. Others who didnt 'look'/sound middle or upper class were universally patronised and denigrated but jumped to it. Years of conditioning on the part of those who jumped i suspect. Im a wolf in sheeps clothing when it comes to class but have learnt to use it to my advantage. Agree tho - it is totally fascinating.

As a gobshite Liverpudlian myself OP, I agree with you - because I've lived elsewhere, I'm not thick scouse like most locals. Most assume I'm not from Liverpool at all, but people from other ares of the country do pick up on the scouseness.

I can turn up the accent but mostly I choose not to. The reactions I get when I am 'posh' (posh to Liverpool ears) are remarkably different when I blend in. Accents are powerful.

No don't agree. It's attitude not accent that can influence.

I think I might sound a bit posh but people don't always listen to me, they tend to listen more to my DH who is common as muck

Accent is a strong identifier of wealth/importance in the UK but anywhere in the world a well-spoken, confident person will get a better response in a situation. I believe that body language (eye contact, stance etc...) is actually the most influential mannerism but it's sub-conscious so we don't think about it. Dressing smartly indicates wealth=success=importance also.

I think there's a whole bunch of crappy things that influence whether a person is taken seriously such as height, gender etc... I think I read somewhere that taller people make more money on average, I can believe it. I'm female, short and soft spoken (posh though ;) ). In my twenties I felt I wasn't taken as seriously as I deserved due to this. It was partly confidence too since I don't have this issue in my thirties (getting too old to care). I have found that wearing a business suit, even in a more relaxed business attire environment works well to create an air of authority (if that's what you want).

It's attitude not accent that can influence

Totally agree. I'm amazed that so many people are impressed by a posh voice

I have a public school voice. No idea I'd been frightening people with it for years.....

This may explain a few things.

I may have found a 'posh' accent a bit intimidating when I was young because of my parents' reaction and also being from a working class deprived area that type of accent would be very unfamiliar.

However, I've since grown up and moved away, and worked in global consulting businesses in the London area where there was a complete mix of accents and backgrounds, from both UK and global people. What I found was that we were all just people getting on with a job, so I would never feel intimidated by an accent or perceived class.

Whether you are from a deprived area and went to a council estate state comp, or were brought up in a mansion and went to a top private school, you can end up in the same job on the same salary. Their parents could have saved a shedload in school fees

Yanbu.

Tis the way it is.

I think people tend to be a bit deferential when faced with someone who speaks well. However the ability to manipulate those around you to get the result you seek tends to be due more to a sense of entitlement, which is constantly reinforced in practice.

I am well spoken but never developed a sense of entitlement. I feel irritated when its remarked upon. I don't feel it is something that should set me apart and yet I am reminded of it. Some people seem to feel it is ok to say "oh you are posh" "you sound very posh" whilst I can't imagine saying to someone "oh you sound very naff" or "you sound common"