To please, please ask for your positive stories of people getting well having been on HDU/ intensive care

[grobagsforever]

DP was admitted last week and moved to HDU last night. They don't know what's wrong. He has fluid on belly, some kind of infection and impiared liver function. There is talk of moving him ti ICU. We seem to be waiting on endless tests. He is 35 we have a three year old and I am 7 months pregnant. I need him . Please tell me your positive stories of recovery from these situations.

Yep, another one thinking of you and yours, Gro.

Hope you've managed to fit in some rest and that you get some joy today.

All I can say is how vile Lulu has been in posting what she/he/it has, sickening. I just hope that your vitriol is ignored and not risen to

Oh, it would seem I miss the juicy stuff. Whatever. My child is still dead of her horrible cancer. And so many others here, their names like a litany, over the 9 years I have been here, whose children, spouses, parents, loved ones, died of cancer.

I'll just continue talking out my arse, I guess.

You know nothing, Jon Snow.

What hobnobs said expat. Another one here full of admiration for the way in which you draw on your unimaginable experiences to try and help. And I'm so sorry to hear about your little girl.

I'm very late to this very sad thread, but I'm going to come in and stick my oar in anyway:

Grobags, I'm so incredibly sorry for what you're going through. It sounds devastating and terrifying and nobody should have to go through it. How furious with the universe you must feel.

And expat and Devere and Crystal and all of you other wonderful women who have lived such heartbreaking losses, I'm so sorry for all of your losses as well. I can't see that platitudes about strength and better places would help, so I just wanted to tell you all how much I admire you and how sad and angry I am that you've had to endure such things.

That is all.

I am seeing dd every day and it nearly kills me as she asks when daddy is coming home. This afternoon I am taking her swimming and DH mum is taking over. It's no one's business but as you all asked- DH parents stress him out. They are not what he needs hence they have not being doing 'shifts'. I am deeply sorry for other posters losses and thank them for sharing their stories.

And I'm sorry everyone resents me staying over. It just so happens the hospital had a side room and a camp bed available. So sorry for my 'luck'.They let me use the paitents only tea trolley as well, the horror!

My daughter is fine, DH needs me more.

Thanks again to the supportive posters.

Grobags - do what you need to do to get through this journey. Only you know your family situation. Wishing you much love and strength. Enjoy your swim with dd today. x

Gro have you thought of asking GP for anti- depressants? They can help a LOT with getting through horrible situations. Hope today goes ok.

Oh ffs no one "resents" you staying over.
People are doing what you asked - sharing their extremely painful and difficult stories.
Which stories do you find "supportive" op as I find the ones I am reading very moving and helpful?

There is no 'resentment'. Your arrangement is highly unusual yes but the concern that has been expressed is not about the arrangement but the effect on you, heavily pregnant, extremely distressed to the point of talking about harming yourself and exhausted.

Why on earth would you think anyone resents you for staying over?
People are trying to be helpful and suggest ways you can look after yourself and your dd.

If the hospital are happy with you staying over then fair enough.
People are maybe surprised that you are actually allowed in a ward or side room or whatever all day and night and are concerned you are doing too much.

It's a very odd thread where people are being told off for supporting the op and trying to help.
I'm not sure what is acceptable to post now.

The OP asked for 'positive' stories - that is the help that Grobags needs.

And I'm sorry everyone resents me staying over I don't think that is the case , I think the suggestions are that you need to keep some semblance of normality for your dd and rest for your, the baby's and dh's sake. You can't and shouldn't have to do this alone.

crystal
Your post made me cry.
Sending you hugs and strength

Morning Gro hope you are managing to get some rest on the camp bed. Very relieved to hear that you're not still on a chair.

I do also hope that you are getting lots of support from the hospital palliative care team. They will be able to access counselling for relatives.

Enjoy swimming with your DD.

Crystal :( sorry you've had such a difficult few months.

Morning gro thinking of you every day. Hope my wish is working x

Hi Grobags. I'm new to your story but would just like to wish you well and you will be in my thoughts.

My experience is different to yours, but I do remember the incredible physical strain when my mum spent 9 weeks in ICU a few years ago, and I wasn't pregnant! Please try and take care of yourself as much as possible; I know it isn't easy when all your focus is on your DH but you need to keep strong.

Take care x

Sharing experience is great. I don't think anyone is suggesting otherwise.

Making judgements about what gro should or shouldn't do in terms of childcare and hospital visits, not so much. It is HER decision, and none of us stand in her shoes. Yes, some of us have been through similar, awful experiences. There are a lot of tears in the world. But everybody, and every family is different.

It's not very much to ask that advice is given bearing the utter individuality of the situation in mind, ie gently, without being dictatorial, prescriptive, and definitely without implying that she is a bad parent for doing this in the only way she feels she can.

This is a point about TONE not CONTENT. This is NOT your average AIBU, and the tone needs to reflect that. I think some posters who have been in similar situations and who mean very, very well have come over as unintentionally aggressive and that is not supportive right now.

Hoping that Mr Gro has had a better night and his symptoms are under better control.

Glad you're getting a break from the ward, you'll have a lot of fun at the pool with MiniGro splashing about.

Hope you get some sparkle of joy today.

Im thinking of you and your family group. When my grandmother was terminally ill my mother and I stayed at her bedside for a week and staff also provided a little room with a camp bed for us to grab some sleep. I didn't think that was unusual and certainly it was a god send for us and allowed us both to be there for her.

Group my heart goes out to you and my only advice is do what feels right, you are the one who has to live with your choices so make the ones that feel right. My father was recently hospitalised and was potentially very ill indeed. Despite not seeing him for a very very long time for a lot of distressing reasons. I went to him in hospital because it felt right for me xx

Sorry Gro it seems determined to rename you group!

grobags hope you're feeling ok, and are managing to get at least some rest. Have a lovely time swimming with your DD later. Thinking of you.