To please, please ask for your positive stories of people getting well having been on HDU/ intensive care

[grobagsforever]

DP was admitted last week and moved to HDU last night. They don't know what's wrong. He has fluid on belly, some kind of infection and impiared liver function. There is talk of moving him ti ICU. We seem to be waiting on endless tests. He is 35 we have a three year old and I am 7 months pregnant. I need him . Please tell me your positive stories of recovery from these situations.

Sending you love and support, grobags. Hope they can settle your DH.s nausea soon. xxx

My cousin is in Surrey and has pre schoolers. She has an excellent knowledge of support, nurseries, toddler groups etc etc . She also has a clinical role in the nhs so could be a real help.and support.
Let me know if that might.be useful op.

Grobags - you probably feel anything but right now, but I can't tell you how strong you are. I think the negative thoughts and fears are absolutely normal and natural in the circumstances, but you're doing so very well to remain positive with your DH.

This thread has made me feel really ashamed of the fact that I've not been appreciating the really important things in life lately, and have been really weak over far less significant things.

That's a lovely post, Isabella. And what she says is absolutely true grobags.

Thinking of you Gro.

Have been reading your story from the off, but it was a little close to home for me to comment. My MIL was very poorly, she only went into hospital because of a fall but ended up in HDU after a very serious operation to remove her large intestine because of cancer. She was in a week and it was very touch and go. She is now doing much better and on a main ward. It's a long slow progress but she is doing better than expected.

The staff on HDU were amazing, could not fault them at all.

I hope your DH's nausea eases, are they giving him medication to help?

Yes but meds aren't cutting it. DH is being so brave.

I hope they can stop the nausea. It's impossible to think about anything else while being sick. Horrible.

They have such good anti sickness drugs now its a bit worrying they are not working.
What are they doing about finding out why he is feeling so sick?

Nausea is never necessary, I hope they are doing everything they can to find a solution to prevent it. Is he still on ITU?

Does he have a diagnosis yet?

Sickness is abating at last. We think of it as the toxins coming out.

You are both having such an awful time. Life seems so unfair sometimes.
I really hope tomorrow is a better day for your DH and you get some better news about his review. He sounds lovely and you are both being very strong. Am thinking of you both. [Thanks]

Sorry, should have been

Are they going to scan him? He has been in for a while now hasn't he?
I would be pushing for a bit more OP.
A scan is not invasive.
Do they have the facilities at the hospital for MRI?

Hello Gro
I just wanted you to know that I've been where you are now - I was 3 months pregnant with dc2 when my dh was diagnosed with a rare cancer, when I was 7 months pregnant we were told it was terminal and they moved him to palliative care. We tried everything - alternative therapies, drug trials etc etc, but tragically for us nothing worked and he died when ds2 was 4 weeks old... But this DOES NOT mean this will happen to you! There are many stories here which show that many people do come out the other side of even the most bleak prognoses..

But - I just wanted you to know that I know how you are feeling right now. My dh was 37, I was 31 and I too thought about ending it all - I even made a will detailing my chosen guardians for my dcs.

And now .. It's 5 years later. I am remarried, very very happy and am daily grateful that I did not act on my plans. My dc, especially dc2, remind me so much of my first dh which is wonderful.

It is very very dark for you at the moment but I promise you that this, too, shall pass. What got me through my darkest moments were:

1. Realising that my thoughts / wishes didn't actually change anything; which gave me the freedom to not think, which I found easier.
2. When I thought I would die from the fear and pain I would parcel time into the smallest segment I could cope with (sometimes even 10 seconds), knowing that the feeling would, after one (or a few) of these periods, pass.

I don't know if this helps you, but know you are not alone. PM me any time, I've been thinking of you a lot.

I have just read through the entire thread and my heart goes out to you grobags. I cannot imagine what you are having to deal with. I will keep you and DH in my thoughts. Wishing you both peace and the strength to fight this.

Tomorrow you need to tackle the consultant and ask exactly what the diagnosis is, why he is having these specific symptoms and what the plan is.

How is your three year old coping?

Fantastic post wherehavealltheflowersgone. Sounds as though what you went through was awful but great to hear you've found a new happiness. Long may it continue x

Grobags, here's hoping that his nausea abates and that the review tomorrow gives you something tangible to hope for. Thinking of you all x

wherehavealltheflowersgone I can't figure out how to pm you from my phone but I would love to communicate with you if you are willing. Please can you PM me so I can reply?

Spending the night in a chair by DH's bed. He is so sick I cannot leave him.

Sorry DH so sick tonight gro. Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you. Hope you can get some rest. Things can seem so dark in middle of night, but you're not alone xxx

I hope both you and your DH manage to get some rest tonight. What a horrible situation. I cannot even begin to imagine how you are feeling. We are all here for you.

Thinking of you tonight grobags - wish there was something I could say or do to help. x