To please, please ask for your positive stories of people getting well having been on HDU/ intensive care

[grobagsforever]

DP was admitted last week and moved to HDU last night. They don't know what's wrong. He has fluid on belly, some kind of infection and impiared liver function. There is talk of moving him ti ICU. We seem to be waiting on endless tests. He is 35 we have a three year old and I am 7 months pregnant. I need him . Please tell me your positive stories of recovery from these situations.

Thanks for the update - sending your DH positive vibes for eating/drinking/mobilising.

And how are you, Grobags? Are you getting any support?

I'll sing if it will help Grobags. I'm too fat.

Sounds like slightly better news today. Hope it continues.

That's really good that you seem to be having a really positive attitude. No doubt your dh will get strong enough.

Grobags you need to get somebody in to advocate for you both. If i'm reading your posts right then the hospital are withholding treatment from your dp until he isn't oxygen dependant and can walk and eat normally? That's just ridiculous. They can't do that. That's like saying they will only treat a well person. What's the situation with the ascites?

Ascites is down we think. Belly still distended but we assume it will be for a good few days anyway. Like when you have a baby! Chemo right now would kill him but we need them to focus on getting him stable for treatment.

Mrsmaturin are you a doctor experienced in treating cancer patients? Because I don't think your comments are very helpful. Chemotherapy is extremely toxic even when you're well. Equally surgery is not to be undertaken lightly if you are very weak. To put bluntly both of those treatments can kill healthy patients never mind ones who have been sick enough to require itu. Ensuring that her dh is fit enough to withstand the treatments is essential to avoid making him worse and giving him the best possible chance.

The op hasn't given details about what is making him too weak or the type of cancer he has. So even if you are a healthcare professional in a relevant field (like I am) I really don't see how you can conclude that he's having anything other than exactly what he needs.

Grobags sending you and your dh all the very best and here's hoping he's fit enough to start treatment soon xxxx

Sounds like an improvement then. Did they need to drain the ascites? Did the consultant today give you any more information on an exact diagnosis? Sorry to be Mrs ? but it doesn't feel to me like you've got the full picture.

Sorry yellow x posted with you. The op is clearly in a very difficult position and in a vulnerable state. My concern is that everybody has all the information they need. That doesn't seem to be the case at present.

Maybe this will help. Assessing performance status is commonly used to determine what treatments patients are suitable for - see this link:

www.riskprediction.org.uk/index_perfstat.php

With the information given Grobags's dh is Grobags's a 4, possibly a 3. Chemotherapy is patients like him often has no benefit and significant chance of unpleasant side effects or making him worse.

When you see this it is clear why it is rainfall that a man who is needing oxygen and can't get around without a chair shouldn't have toxic treatment yet.

Clearly he is making significant improvements though so hopefully this will change as soon as possible so that he is fit enough. I'm certain that his doctors will be keen to start treatment as soon as it's safe to do so

Grobags just wanted to clarify that the link doesn't have anything specific to cancer or that might be upsetting reading, just helps to explain where your dh is at the moment and what he needs to be able to achieve to get treatment. His doctors may well have already discussed this with you. Good luck xxx

yellow does that apply to all cancers?
DD was in a state of total collapse by the time we got her to hospital. She was on chemo within hours.
There was no time for prognosis at that stage.

It might be different in children deverethemuzzler, my experience is with adults. I'm sure there are exceptions in adults too but generally speaking this, or similar scoring, is used to determine if someone is fit enough for chemotherapy. Hope your dd is doing well x

Glad he sounds so much better. :)

Your nhs trust will be being questioned big time about why they have a man in icu who doesn't need to be. What does the nurse in charge of him do, just sit and watch him and over see the alternative stuff? Sounds like he doing well.

How are you coping?

grobags Continuing to think of your little family. I'm so pleased that DH got to see your baby on the scan, it must have given him an emotional boost. I hope you're receiving real life support for yourself too! x

Last year my dad was kept on ICU for two days longer than he needed to be, because they didn't have any available beds in the cardiac ward...

Grobags, glad things are looking up slightly. Thinking of you and your DH x

His case is being officially reviewed by professors level specialists in the morning. Given how hard his body has fought back from it's acute condition they will consider if there is any possible treatment or management. His DNR order has also been removed

Devere it's just been pointed out to me by another poster who you are. Sorry to be insensitive about your dd just didn't recognise your name x

Crossed posted grobags that's great news xxx

It sounds like they are exploring all the options for your DH and I hope that has given you both something to hold on to. I have no idea if I'm saying any of the right things btw, so I'm hope I'm not saying anything insensitive. Please let me know if I do. x

Grobags- you sound like such an amazing, calm, strong woman. Please remember though that whenever you have a wobble there is a big crowd of MNtters here for you xxxxxxxx

yellow you really have no need to apologise
But thank you

Who agreed to the DNR gro ?
That is really shocking in such a young man with no full diagnosis.
I had no idea these things happened.
So glad he is making improvements.

Who was it who signed the DNR? That is rather surprising in such a young patient, especially given the circumstances and the lack of treatment plan, and indeed until recently, diagnosis.

Hope today has brought some more improvement.

Does he have a diagnosis yet, Grobags? It must be hard to know what is best to do without one.