AIBU to think you don't let your children play out in the garden to scream at each other/play at 7.45 on a Sunday morning!

[17leftfeet]

I genuinely thought I had had a massive lie in when I was woken up by the sound of children playing -but no, it was before 8am!

Mum has just ineffectually started shushing them but was met with a toddler screaming 'NO' at her

Now I appreciate these children may be early risers etc but have a bit of consideration for your neighbours, surely?!

Nobody wants silence but they don't want screaming kids and lawn mowers. Big difference. As I have said if being out side at that time on a morning is so important take the noise somewhere else such as a park. My extra hour of sleep can not really be done anywhere else.

In regards to I should move how about you keep your unruly kids under control or take them an do it somewhere else.

Oh now I get ya. Sorry Odd

if my child was going to be shrieking and squealing I wouldn't let them out until 9/10. we used to have neighbours who let their kids do this. bouncing and squealing onthe trampoline at 7.30 on a weekend

what about on a weekday? I don't let mine out until 8.

Why would I go to the park when which has houses near it when we have a perfectly lovely communal garden to play in?

I am not going to pander to possibly grumpy neighbors and their desire for a lie in. I would prefer quiet evenings and no smoking on balconies, that would fit my lifestylebut I live in close proximity to other people so I need to accept the things that annoy me and they have no right to complain about a child playing outside.

Jesus there are some defensive people this thread.

It's not a strange or unusual concept for people to sleep in at the weekend. You might not do it, but if you've made it to adulthood you must have come across a fair few people who do. Holding off on the noisy stuff till a time like 9am (a random time admittedly but makes sense to me personally) isn't going to impact you wildly and completely ruin your day so why not show a bit of generosity about it? It's nice to be nice, especially if it's not a big deal?

Same applies to late night noise obviously.

One offs always happen but I've found neighbours are a lot more accepting if generally an effort is made by everybody . It's much nicer living amongst people who don't hate you and who you don't hate.

Great for you if you live amongst people who keep similar hours and lifestyles, but most of us don't and just need to rub along together. To start banging on about legalities and rights just makes you an arse and an unpleasant person to live close to. If it's a case of doing something that requires minimal effort from you to prevent more stress to someone else and you point blank refuse to even acknowledge it as a problem then your just selfish in all honesty.

Then maybe you should move.

It is a communal garden therefore it is expected that those who use it do so in the spirit of the community. Such as not letting your DC run around screaming in it at 7am. People smoking on there balcony is not going to wake you up is it?

Keeping the noise level down in a communal garden is just good manners whether that is at 7am or 7pm.

It depends on the noise levels, really. I can't stand kids being allowed to squawk and screech at the top of their voices at any time of day, to be honest.

What about evenings? My neighbours kids screech and scream all evening too and I want to KILL THEM.

I cannot understand why their mother doesn't know to tell them to shut the fuck up.

DH and I let our 2yo and 3yo out early at the weekend (6.15 is not unheard of) because, try as we might, they are going to be noisy somewhere. We reason thusly:

1. they can be out in the garden talking and occasionally shouting to each other. They can be heard by more people but from a greater distance, so hopefully the level of disturbance will be low.

2. if in the house, they get bored and fractious and noisier and then we have to increase volume to try and control them. Our immediate neighbours (both of whom also have small children and also cherish their sleep) are more likely to be disturbed if we keep them in, IMO.

Therefore, we made an executive decision to keep immediate neighbours happy and let the kids outside early. If they do start shrieking then they come back in - they know this and are generally quieter out there.

I've never heard of the 9am rule but clearly I'm in the minority on that!

YANBU- when you've been up at 6:30 every morning and not home till 7.00 a nice sleep in is lovely. We're only talking 9.00 here FFS hardly noon, you've still got the rest of the day.

So why don't you take your children to the park or for a walk plump? Then they can be noisy and not disturb either your immediate neighbours or those just over the way. Or do you and your DH sit quietly in the house while your kids wake the street up?

It is good that you try an keep the noise levels down which is not always easy damn near impossible but I bet your neighbours would appreciate you more if your kids didn't play out at 6:30 am.

So you deliberately let your children go outside where they will disturb a larger number of people rather than staying indoors where they will only impact on next-door, who are already up?

And you think that voices outside, unmuffled by soft-furnishings and deadened by shared walls will be lower? really? Kind of flawed login at work their. Perhaps you mean it is quieter for you?

You need to think again. Your executive (?) decision was totally wrong, based on incorrect assumptions and seems designed to give yourself peace by passing it onto your other neighbours.

6.15 is incredibly inconsiderate at the weekend. And by the time you've heard them shrieking, gone outside and brought them back in and shut the door behind you - it's too late. Suck it up and entertain your children quietly indoors or get dressed and take them somewhere they can shriek and play to their hearts delight without waking people up at a time when they might reasonably expect to be asleep at the weekend.

people smoking on there balcony is not going to wake you up is it?

No but it makes my child's asthma worse which arguably is a more serious thing that a disturbed lie in.

People often have bbqs and get togethers late into the evening in the communal gardens, we are also not the only family playing in the play area early in the morning.

My child doesn't scream or screech for no reason but he does say weeee! When he goes down the slide and giggle and chat.

Before we had children the noise of children playing didn't offend me, I find aggressive or upset shouting difficult to listen to but all other noises are just people getting on with their lives.

if in the house, they get bored and fractious and noisier and then we have to increase volume to try and control them

Have you tried playing with them?
Entertaining them?
Ever wondered why they are bored?

Or do you just leave them to their own devices and then boot them outside when you and your DH have had enough of the noise.

How does people smoking on their balcony make your child's asthma worse?
Is he on their balcony with them?
Can you not remove him from their vicinity?
Is your child forced to stand there and breath in their smoke?

In regards to neighbours late night get togethers then so be it if they keep you awake then you can wake them up. At least you can complain to the authorities about late night noise nobody can complain about your child's excessive loudness at 7am. However this was about a personal garden not a communal one and whether 9am is a reasonable time for children to wait before screaming their heads off.

The 3 uear old was out at 8 this morning playing with some little cars so not squealing or shouting. Next door but one and the houses that back on to us tend to be out late at night playing music when the weather is nice, which is far more annoying than any small children playing out

It affects my child's asthma because if our windows areopen the smoke comes into pur apartment, yes we keep the windows shut and not use our balcony which is an inconvenience to us but as I said, it's what you getif you live in close proximity to other people.

I don't have any concern that my child playing outside is unreasonable, if people are so sensitive that the sound of children playing upsets them then that is their issue.

I think it's inconsiderate to be out making a noise before 9ish. I've kept my two in until then as they are incapable of keeping the noise down. I saw my neighbours out at 8 this morning reading the papers all quiet and relaxed - it would have been really unfair to release my beasts!

If they are smoking directly out side you window then you have a duty to ask them not to smoke there. However if your saying the smoke from their balcony above/below you is coming through your window then I find it hard to believe.
Unless you are in the direct vicinity or in a room which has had smokers using it the affect is minimal and more damage is done by the pollution in the street. I have quite sever asthma so I do understand how smoke affects it.

Also it is not the sound of children playing it is the screaming/screeching and excessive noise before8/9 am that is the issue.

Well said, Mrs Bungle! You'd be a pleasure to live next to!

There are no hard and fast laws or rules but its common sense and and about being curteous isnt it.

If you live next door to a load of pisshead bbqing idiots who crank up the singstar at 10pm every Saturday night then yes by all means let your little screaming darlings out to yelp, scream, bounce on the trampolene, have a full blown tantrum etc etc.

If however, you live nextdoor to people who are general decent and dont disturb you then just stop and think if or see if there is any sign of life before letting the kids out early on a weekend.

It works both ways. Consideration and kindness goes hell of a long way but more and more people seem to be so self entitled and think no further than their own needs.

I say this as a mum (of now teens) who had children that rose ay 5am without fail. My 15yo still rarely sleeps past 7am on a weekend (no normal for a teen I am told). I never let my kids out to play before 9am - unless I knew my neighbours were away or up and about. I now will never mow my lawn at 8am just because I am up even when the forecast is rain for later and it may need to wait for another nice day I am free to do it. I dont have many bbqs but even when we do we notify the neighbours, dont have music and keep it down after 8pm (usually invite them) and are usually drawing to a close by 9pm.

If you live in a built up area, estate etc then you have to be aware of others around you.

The sound of children playing is not universally 'nice'. Shrieking, yelling, screaming for mum when they fall over. No, that's not what I want to hear at 7am on a Sunday.

Fortunately most of my neighbours seem to agree, so there are very rarely children in the play park near my house before 9am or late in the evening.

Very emotive language in some posts 'lazing around' Last I checked getting up later than 7am one day a week isn't a sin nor a sign that one is otherwise lazy. If you don't want to lie in then er, get up but don't use your noisy weans to get me up.

At least it wasn't someone playing the bagipes. When we were little - and we were a BIG family (and never permitted the shriek, yell or scream in the garden anyway) one of the neighbours used to practise his bagpipes at the bottom of his garden, which backed onto our side.

Most people really really don't give a flying doodah beyond their own wants (as my friend knows - with her upstairs neighbours whose 2 school aged children never go to bed before 1am and run about screaming/fighting/getting yelled at by dad).

nicename That's reminded me of a flatmate I once had who was a very early riser and who would play a brass instrument in his bedroom at 0730 in the morning. This was a mostly student block. Being of the 'best not waste the day' school of thought, he was most perplexed as to why I might prefer him not to do this...

Dd went on school camp recently and they got woken up by the bag pipes every morning by the one the camp owners. None of the teens were overly impressed