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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To wonder why 'have a spa day' is touted as the solution to so many problems on here?

98 replies

teaandthorazine · 03/05/2014 09:07

Husband run off with his secretary, leaving you with three kids under 6 and no job? Have a spa day. Maybe get your hair cut too.

Thinking of running off with your secretary? Take some time out to think about it, have a spa day.

Boiler broken and flooded the kitchen? Awwwww, have a spa day. Not in your kitchen though.

Lost your job, got kids to support? Get yourself a massage, sweetie. Preferably in a spa.

Boyfriend stumbled in a 4am and pissed in the wardrobe? Selfish bastard, you show him who's boss. By having a spa day.

This advice appears over and over again on MN. It irritates the fuck out of me for some reason.

Has anyone ever, genuinely, found having a spa day helped them with their life issues in anyway whatsoever?

OP posts:
KingJoffreysBloodshotEye · 03/05/2014 09:11

Does it?

I've only ever heard 'Spa Day' said with extreme sarcasm, never as an actual solution.

Confused

Cake and Wine or Brew are the solutions to one's problems. Not sitting in steam. I'm pretty sure every MNer knows that.

Do we even have spas in the UK? I thought they were an American thing like baby showers.

AwfulMaureen · 03/05/2014 09:11

YANBU if anyone suggested that to me I'd laugh!

AnotherFurry · 03/05/2014 09:12

You don't need to go to a spa to have a spa day. It is meant as have a day where you are focused on you and you alone so yabu.

WhoNickedMyName · 03/05/2014 09:13

Irritates the fuck out of you... Really?

I think you need to chill out a bit. Maybe try a spa day Grin.

WhistleTopTomato · 03/05/2014 09:13

YANBU!

MsVestibule · 03/05/2014 09:14

Another one.

Problem: My DH does nothing round the house or spend any time whatsoever with the DCs. I'm fed up with him, and for being responsible for everything, as well as working 16 hours a day.

Answer: Get a cleaner.

whereisthewitch · 03/05/2014 09:14

I have seen this elsewhere but never on MN it's usually have some gin

Chocotrekkie · 03/05/2014 09:15

I think its because it's adult only and so leave the kids with useless oh and get a day for yourself to recharge and he will then realise how wonderful you are.

teaandthorazine · 03/05/2014 09:15

Good idea whonicked Grin

OP posts:
thebodylovesspring · 03/05/2014 09:16

Calm down dear! Have a spa day and leave the cleaner to it.

teaandthorazine · 03/05/2014 09:17

chocotrekkie - but that's the point, does anyone seriously think that will work? It's pretty shit advice really isn't it?

OP posts:
StillStayingClassySanDiego · 03/05/2014 09:18

What irks me is the idea that people have the readily available money to spare for said spa day.

I've never been to a Spa but I imagine it's not cheap.

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 03/05/2014 09:18

and have some gin while your at it.

Lilaclily · 03/05/2014 09:18

Oh usually on mumsnet no matter what the problem is or what time of time it is people are always advised to open the wine

'my dh drinks too much & sleeps around'
'don't worry it's nearly wine o'clock ' at 9am

Trooperslane · 03/05/2014 09:19

Guess where I'm going today?

And it sounds like your Bangor Reserves are shot, op.

Dr Trooper prescribes a spa day for you

MsVestibule · 03/05/2014 09:19

I've seen it quite a few times. Normally when an OP is complaining that their DP is taking them for granted and behaving as though he's still single. It's normally along the lines of "Leave him for a day/weekend with the DCs while you take yourself off and have some 'you' time". It's normally meant well, but can't imagine it's terribly helpful.

Lilaclily · 03/05/2014 09:19

Tali - crossed posts Grin
[cheers]

nannynoss · 03/05/2014 09:20

WhoNickedMyName Grin

Some of my mummy friends and I go for a spa weekend, every 6 months or so. It absolutely does solve all our problems! until we walk out and are back to reality

WhistleTopTomato · 03/05/2014 09:20

'my dh drinks too much & sleeps around'
'don't worry it's nearly wine o'clock ' at 9am

Grin
KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn · 03/05/2014 09:20

I had a spa day and it irritated the life outta me!

BillyBanter · 03/05/2014 09:20

I have never seen this advice on here.

No one can fix 'husband ran off with the plumber'.

A spa (for some people) is a relaxing treat, like a cup of tea. It's just part of the advice to 'be kind to yourself'. I'm worth doing something nice for myself, instead of sitting around doing nothing feeling worthless.

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 03/05/2014 09:21

Wine Lilac Grin

meditrina · 03/05/2014 09:22

I've never seen that advice in the the sort of circumstances OP describes.

I have seen it as an example of what someone could do if the actual advice is 'you need some time away from it all'. Which is unlikely advice for someone who has just discovered her H has been betraying her.

This is so very unlike the MN I read, I wonder if the OP has ever looked at Relationships threads (or just hangs out in AIBU, where people have been posting all sorts of stuff especially in the last couple of weeks).

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 03/05/2014 09:22

My idea of a relaxing day is lots of chocolate, PS3 (PS4) Mass Effect trilogy and pretending I'm shooting people who have pissed me off.

trixymalixy · 03/05/2014 09:23

It's just shorthand for taking done time out to relax and pamper yourself.