Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to want free delivery on formula

185 replies

Tangoandcreditcards · 26/04/2014 07:04

I'm ffing my 2 month-old. (From birth, I've had a double mastectomy) I've been stewing about this for a month.

I ordered a load of formula to be delivered to my local Boots (5 doors down, as opposed to "the high street" which is further away, it's a tiny Boots, so doesn't stock the formula I'm using in the quantity I need (hence the order).

If you spend over £20 online for store delivery online you get free delivery. So I ordered a little over £20 worth. When the transaction went through I got charged for delivery. I contacted them for a delivery refund and was told that because it was formula, they legally can't have any offers on it, and I would have to be charged (£3.95!).

I do appreciate why it's illegal advertise/promote formula for newborns, and why breastfeeding is encouraged by HCPs because I do actually understand that some women might want/need some encouragement and education to choose BFing.

However... BFing is free, FFing is not, and NO-ONE is going to switch to formula because they can get free blooming delivery on it (or loyalty points, for that matter). I feel cheated. Maybe I am just being precious about 4 quid because I'm overly sensitive about the subject. I'll obviously just get off my bum and go somewhere else to get it, but I'm enraged at the fact that I have to, it just seems like legislation taken a bit too far to me! Who can I complain to? Is it poor interpretation of the law or just that the rules don't make sense? AIBU to think that economic sanctions (!!) on FFing parents are unfair?

OP posts:
Clint88 · 26/04/2014 07:50

I think OP and others who have had mastectomies should get their formula free on prescription.

Ledkr · 26/04/2014 07:52

Yes clint I often thought the same.
I am involved in a charity for women with "the gene" and preventative surgery is only going to become more common.

ballinacup · 26/04/2014 07:54

When I was FFing DS, reflux Aptimil was 11.99 a tin, so I could have made 11 whole fucking pence in clubcard points on each one. Massive incentive, that would have been.

Clint88 · 26/04/2014 07:54

I also think the bf/ff thing is very location specific, ff is very much the norm here. Also don't know if this is regional but we have to observe a feed being made up where I work for ff parents, and we are totally allowed to help them make first feed - there are UNICEF guidelines on ff.

Original poster
Tangoandcreditcards · 26/04/2014 08:00

ledkr yes, mutant here too, and with more women getting tested earlier and earlier there may be more of us in the future. Although I'm holding out hope that research will give less drastic prevention/treatment options to the next generation...

To those suggesting free formula, don't get me wrong, it would obviously save me a packet, but I can see that it would be difficult to 'draw a line' when it comes to determining which medical conditions that prevent someone from BFing would qualify. I just want not to have to pay delivery when I'm already spending money with a retailer.

OP posts:
Figster · 26/04/2014 08:02

Completely with you op it's not the formula itself on offer it's delivery of products utterly ridiculous!!

SuffolkNWhat · 26/04/2014 08:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Tangoandcreditcards · 26/04/2014 08:11

imsooverit I would have LOVED to have told my midwife I had employed a wet nurse... Maybe next time (am I really already thinking about next time?) I could advertise on MN for one?

OP posts:
PetraArkanian · 26/04/2014 08:12

Order £20 of something else with the formula and return it as soon as you pick it up...

RabbitSaysWoof · 26/04/2014 08:16

You did make 2 purchases one of shit loads of formula and one of delivery service to your local shop. They would surely be making their special offer on delivery not on formula, im sure they would be within the rules to let you have this for free.
I actually think they are discriminating against ffeeding parents to take this offer away because you are buying the evil formula.

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 26/04/2014 08:21

tango and ledkr - this has made me feel totally shit for you. Sad

I actually do think you should be getting free formula. I think a condition like that is clear enough

The free delivery online is slightly harder to resolve. Again, I think you should be getting the free delivery but not quite sure how that could work. Maybe you could be issued with some kind of exemption certificate with a long life voucher code that can only be used on your account

Frankly, I remain unconvinced about all the claims re breast milk that are made. My GP has said that a lot of the factors are societal and more research is being done - which is good.

I say all this as someone who is currently exclusively expressing for DD (14 weeks) and have done the same for DS aged 16 months. In fact he's now back on breast milk as I have an over supply

Both of my children were severely tongue tied and didn't latch on post the snip - probably because it was done weeks after birth. And that was with serious nagging from DH and I to get a quick referral.

I'm sick to death of some people who have had no problems breastfeeding telling me how "easy" and "natural" it is and all I needed to do was keep persevering - as though I'm somehow not doing it right and have a bottle fetish!

Separately, there is absolutely no support at all to help with expressing. It was only because we knew what we were doing after DS that I started expressing on day 4 for DD.

With DS, I only started expressing on day 6, I think when my DH (after googling) got me to start to keep my supply up and made sure we had a very good double electric pump. If not, my supply would have dried up whilst all they"professionals" told me to "trust my body" Angry

Sorry -that was a rant and a half but my very long point is that there needs to be much more nn-judgemental support about all types of feeding. With HCPs looking at cases individually

Ledkr · 26/04/2014 08:23

Also I do find it ridiculous that the follow on milks are excluded from these rules as in my opinion they are worse as completely unnecessary and a total rip off.
For some formula is essential.

Waltonswatcher1 · 26/04/2014 08:26

I am a breast feeding pusher ! Ff one and bf two so I know both options well . But there are always reasons why ff works better for some and in your case it is essential . I actually think you should qualify for a financial help if bf is totally out of the question medically .
It is unfair that you get charged for delivery .

Ledkr · 26/04/2014 08:27

gobbo yes there are many other reasons why bf isn't possible.
My dd had a cleft palate so was unable to suck and had special bottles but had I been able to Breast feed it would have been unlikely that she would.

It's so lovely to be getting some support and empathy on this thread because as I said I had a short shrift before when I asked why I was unable to get any info on bottles and formula as I had no clue what I needed to buy.

Crazy.

tobysmum77 · 26/04/2014 08:32

I had to ff also but for different reasons. Maybe feed the baby on standard milk, sugar, rusks and tea instead..... That way you can get points.

Would anyone honestly think 'oh I'll stop breastfeeding because that way I can get clubcard points' - I mean REALLY?

It makes formula milk akin to fags. Thanks for that.

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 26/04/2014 08:32

ledkr - YES re those stupid follow on milks too. I just switched to cow's milk on DS' first birthday plus supplemented by multivits when I remember!

And yes, it is lovely to have some non-judgemental space to discuss this.

Who'd have thunk that we'd have found it on AIBU! Grin

TheRealAmandaClarke · 26/04/2014 08:33

How annoying.

I have found, this week, that every seemingly good deal or offer or reasonable purchase agreement is anything but. It's enormously frustrating. All shops are rubbish.

Congratulations on your new baby.

BikeRunSki · 26/04/2014 08:34

Get it home delivery from Kiddicare. They didn't charge me delivery and it comes very quickly. And they give you an hour timeslot that it will arrive in.

I stopped buying formula from Boots when the checkout girl had a go at my for FF. I had my reasons, and medical support from DS's pediatrician.

tobysmum77 · 26/04/2014 08:34

and I think medical reasons is a white elephant. It is a really pathetic, unpleasant ineffectual way of encouraging breastfeeding.

Someone who has chosen to ff shouldn't be made to feel bad either.

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 26/04/2014 08:35

And I write these pronouncements from my bed where I am currently mumsnetting, feeding DD a bottle and expressing

How apt!

Gobbolinothewitchscat · 26/04/2014 08:37

I stopped buying formula from Boots when the checkout girl had a go at my for FF

bike - please tell me this was some hideous misunderstanding (not that it makes it much better)

mrstigs · 26/04/2014 08:39

Yanbu. I'm a big fan of supporting mothers who want to bf to be able to, and was a bf support worker for a while, but that doesn't mean that I support mum's who want to ff being penalised like that. The ban on special offers and advertising for formula is sensible enough but shouldn't extend to things such as delivery charges. That's just petty and pointless. I guess it was just seen as a blanket ban on all types of offer was the easiest way to enforce the rules.

tobysmum77 · 26/04/2014 08:43

yes I'm ok with the advertising as I can see how women having a hard time it could influence. Special offers are probably bad because they would have the effect of making some people switch from week to week which instict tells me probably isn't a good idea with a young baby.

points/ delivery are different though.

Original poster
Tangoandcreditcards · 26/04/2014 08:43

tobysmum I agree on the no points rule (regardless of medical circumstances), I think it's ineffective and discriminatory. I can get any number of promotions or points on any number of actually unhealthy options - the logic of excluding formula makes no sense.

In this case I don't even think it's an attempt to encourage breastfeeding, I think it's cynical manipulation of the "no offers" rule by Boots to make an extra delivery charge off a high value item.

OP posts:
queenofthemountains · 26/04/2014 08:45

I knew my daughter had a cleft lip and most probably her palate. We asked at ante natal classes about formula and were told that they didn't show how to make it up or how to sterilise. It still makes me angry when I think about it. We didn't have a clue. The cleft nurse showed us after she was born.