To think this child should be in bed?

[Rollergirl1]

I had to make a late night trip (around 9pm) to the supermarket yesterday. While I was there I saw my next door neighbour with her 18month old DD in the pram. NDN does not work so it's not as if she is not able to do her shopping during the day. Although she is a single mother so I fully understand that she doesn't have the help from a partner. But this is not just a one off occurence. Quite often I have seen them when i am driving back from the gym or if I am out for a run, and it is generally around the same time.

Now I know that everyone parents differently but personally I think that children thrive on a regular routine. And more importantly, surely the child needs a good nights sleep?

You really need to mind your own business!

Poor effort. 9 pm isn't even a "late night shop" and it's not like an 18 month old has to be up for school in the morning.

Its none of Your Business whatsoever.

18 months is still very young. Maybe the child has a long nap in the afternoon and a trip out in the eve helps tire them out for bed?

If she is a single parent and the child sleeps in the afternoon this may be her only chance to run errands.

Yabu. None of your business.

Maybe there regular routine involves going to bed late and getting up late?

How do you know she doesn't have a regular routine? What if she goes to be late and gets up a bit later too? Perhaps she has a bigger nap during the day. I'm sure the mum knows what works for her daughter.

What coffee said.
My DD is 2yo and doesn't go to bed until nearly 9 o'clock. She sleeps until 7am ish without stirring. Your ndn may have discovered that a later bedtime means a more peaceful night for them both.
YABU.

I know it's none of my business. Just wondered what others thought.

YABU. Supermarket with a toddler much more bearable at 9pm. I don't think 9pm is very late either.

This wouldnot even register with my tbh.

Sometimes we are out late with me 3 yo dd, on special occasions/holidays etc. I never realised people would be looking at their watches and tutting!

Not your business.

No you're right. That child won't be able to get up for work like this.

I don't think we can say 'MYOB'. AIBU would hardly exist if everyone did that.

And obviously if you see them regularly at that time she does have a routine!
Don't forget the little girl will nap during the day so all bets can be off if she has a long nap than usual occasionally.

I used to often take ds shopping late maybe quite likely my neighbours judged me too. still if I made their lives a little more interesting and give them something to fret about it was worth it

What others think, clearly, is that it is no big deal, and not worth all the curtain twitching.

For all we know she had one of those annoying 5pm naps and NDN knew no point in trying to do bedtime til late.

If you really want to know what I think, I think you sound terribly judgemental and narrow-minded, and perhaps you'd do well to examine yourself before criticising your neighbour.

Go to Spain. You'll self-combust.

My 2 yr old goes to bed late, suits me fine as it means he sleeps all night and until 10am. I can get up with the older DC's to see them off to school then have a quick tidy all before the terrible 2's start

Okay, fair points. I will concede that I am being unreasonable.

The fact that you regularly see them out at around 9pm suggests that an outing at that time fits best with their daily routine.

I would imagine that the child is getting plenty of sleep but, at 18 months, probably not all in one go! In fact, your NDN may well find that the walk or drive back from the supermarket at that time is the perfect way to settle her DD off to sleep for the night.

My DD is 2.8. There is absolutely no way she would have gone to sleep at 7pm & slept through to the next morning at 18 months - which is what you seem to think is 'the norm'. She didn't start sleeping in one long stretch (currently from about 7.30pm to 7.30am) until she dropped her daytime nap around 3 months ago. It used to be a choice of DD sleeping from 7pm ish to 3.30am ish or from 10pm ish to 6.30am ish. I know which I prefer!

Also, not all children this age need a routine. It's often the parents who need a routine.

We travelled a lot with our first child, often changing time zones and sleeping in unfamiliar places. He went to sleep when he felt like it, co slept with us, and was up at odd hours quite often. He was the most easy going, contented baby, able to sleep anywhere and adjust to new people, places, and activities.

We've come home from family events in the early hours of the morning, kids draped over shoulders, popping them into their beds and just taking off their shoes - it's living life.