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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to have sex without getting cystitis almost *every* time? Please help!

87 replies

SimplyRedHead · 01/04/2014 06:11

So, I've been up since 5, sat on the loo with horrendous cystitis symptoms.

This happens about 36 hours after having sex with my husband, 90% of the time.

I've had just about every test there is: dye injections, scans, long term anti biotics etc. but nothing works. I've been prone to cystitis childhood but now it only seems to flare up after sex.

Please help! I want to have sex with my husband but this is rather putting me off!!

Any tips/advice?

OP posts:
Original poster
SimplyRedHead · 01/04/2014 06:12

*cystitis since childhood

OP posts:
SelectAUserName · 01/04/2014 06:28

I feel your pain. I also get it far more often than not post-sex. In my case it's apparently because I have quite a short, ahem "passage" so I get a bruised cervix/bladder v easily.

Different positions help - I'm less likely to get it if I'm on top (I've perfected a sort of back-and-forth motion rather than up-and-down) or if we're 'spooning'; otherwise it has to be fairly gentle with more manual stimulation.

Always go to the loo as soon as you can after sex; if you drink cranberry juice as a preventative (I don't, I stick almost exclusively to water) DON't drink it during an attack; if you do have a flare-up drink as much water as you can and mix a teaspoon of bicarbonate of soda into half a pint of water every couple of hours - it's alkali and helps neutralise the acidic pee.

Original poster
SimplyRedHead · 01/04/2014 06:36

Thanks select - I used to get it about every 6 weeks plus every time I had sex. Now it seems to be mostly sex related Sad.

I do wonder if it's something to do with bruising so now you've mentioned that I'm going to swallow my pride and go back to my GP (or maybe a sexual health clinic.....).

It's been so bad I've been hospitalised twice. Best thing about pregnancy was not having sex so I didn't get cystitis!

OP posts:
TruffleOil · 01/04/2014 06:49

Oh, I feel for you.

There's various over the counter bladder analgesics (I buy one in the US, it turns your pee orange - pyridium) and often times if I take this, I can bear to wait out the infection & it passes without an antibiotic. There was a time that I was on antibiotics all the time and it made me nervous.

Have you tried taking a single dose of antibiotic every time you have sex?

TruffleOil · 01/04/2014 06:50

Also, I had them throughout my 20's and 30's and now at 41 I seem not to get them anymore - once in the past two years, I think (touch wood).

Stubbed · 01/04/2014 06:50

I used to get it a lot and had surgery (dilatation) which was successful - I hardly get it now. You could ask for this? It is basically to widen your tube so easier to flush out.

bottleofbeer · 01/04/2014 07:02

Hiya

bottleofbeer · 01/04/2014 07:06

Oops. Get yourself to a health food shop and buy cranberry capsules. Not your average health supplement but ten thousand mg capsules. Yes, ten thousand.

Take one every day and it really will help. They're much stronger and more effective than cranberry juice. You need antibiotics now. But the capsules will prevent it in future.

Backinthering · 01/04/2014 07:16

What helped me was washing, preferably with antibacterial soap, before intercourse. Not at all spontaneous but better than a UTI. If there's no e-coli bacteria in the area then nothing can be forced into the urethra.

TheSmallPrint · 01/04/2014 07:22

Make sure you have a wee before sex (unless you're hit by passion that means you can wait!) and have a wee as quickly after as you can. Advice given to me by a GP which has stood me in good stead. Although there may be more medical reasons for your repeated bouts, it's certainly worth doing.

Orangeanddemons · 01/04/2014 07:23

I used to get this. Then I was prescribed a prophylactic anti biotic to take after every time I had sex. It really works. I never ever get it now

littleballerina · 01/04/2014 07:29

I'm with you. I get it every few months.

poocatcherchampion · 01/04/2014 07:29

probiotic drinsk helped me.

I hope you realise it is more common than you feared!!

paxtecum · 01/04/2014 07:31

When you are buying the cranberry capsules also get some good quality (expensive) pro biotics.

They will work wonders rebalancing the good bacteria, that get killed off with anti biotics.

Jesuisunepapillon · 01/04/2014 07:56

I had this with my last partner, it was soul destroying. I then read that Muslim women very rarely get this issue, because their genital hygiene is scrupulous. (They wash with water after using the loo instead of loo roll) The book suggested that both partners wash their genitals before intercourse, with some gentle soap. And then after, sit on the loo, fill a bottle with warm water and pour it down over yourself, use some natural soap and wash clean again. I know it sounds like a massive faff and a bit of a passion killer, but if think the infections are due to bacteria present in faeces and this hugely reduces your chances of getting one.

My partner could never be bothered to do this but I used to bottle wash after every time we had sex and it cut down my my infections dramatically. It might help you?

letsgetreadytoramble · 01/04/2014 07:59

I agree with Stubbed, I had it really badly too and then had a dilation procedure and never get it now. I didn't even need anaesthetic for it, took about 5 minutes and was a bit like a smear. I'd recommend asking for that. Thanks

JanePurdy · 01/04/2014 08:13

Sounds like you have it bad. I used to get it a lot in my early 20s and found weeing before & after sex was good. I was also told if it persisted they could give me prophylactic antibiotics.

NewtRipley · 01/04/2014 08:25

Wet wipes, gentle ones, before and after sex, or wash. Pee before and straight after. Lubrication.

WheresMrMonkey · 01/04/2014 08:27

Ouch, worst thing ever. Think you must know all the tips and just need to pester GP for help

IndridCold · 01/04/2014 08:34

I too suffered from this and totally sympathise.

Buy a copy of Sexual Cystitis by Angela Kilmartin, and do everything she says.

FanjolinaJolie · 01/04/2014 08:47

Jug of warm water to rinse afterwards as well as peeing straight after. Add a drop of tea tree oil.

Look at your diet and perhaps see a skilled dietician to see if anything in your diet is exacerbating the frequency of infections.

I would also recommend pro biotic and slow release vit C daily.

FanjolinaJolie · 01/04/2014 08:48

yes, lube too

AwfulMaureen · 01/04/2014 08:48

Pee immediately after sex....and I mean immediately. I was like you until I began doing this and it's completely stopped.

rallytog1 · 01/04/2014 08:51

I'm also with stubbed. I had the surgery and also a fenton's procedure at the same time (sort of reconstructs the entrance area, some women have it after having a baby if their stitches don't heal right). It really made a difference.

Another thing that really helped was a lubricant that you, ahem, insert with an applicator beforehand. We used pre-seed as we were ttc but it had the unexpected side effect of making everything extremely painless. Just be careful though, as it supposedly helps you to conceive - I got pregnant with my dd in the first month of using it!

You have my sympathies - it's an absolutely miserable thing.

anotetofollowso · 01/04/2014 08:54

Another advocate for peeing after sex. It helped a lot. And prophylactic antibiotics.

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