To bf on the shop floor when there's a feeding room?

[TheFlumpFlan]

I think I was being the exact opposite of inconsiderate, friend thinks I was.

In short:

I was on a shopping trip from hell (4 kids wanting school bits) which was unproductive and I was heading back through the department store to the carpark when I saw they had a clarks shoe bit with a sale (empty). I plonked down, asked the assistant if she had ds1 and ds2 size shoes and started to feed whiney velcro baby in order to be heard rather than screamed over. I'm an experienced feeder (top up, other down) and can easily feed strolling around without flashing a nipple though I sat this time with my back to the main walkway. The assistant replied to my request with 'we have a feeding room', I smiled back and said I was fine and asked again for the shoes. She suggested I feed there and popped back, and gave directions, to which I said I knew it was two floors up, full of mothers who are trying to soothe tiny ones who don't need my lot staring at them/ being loud plus I was in a rush. She looked so grumpy getting bits out and affronted by me. I'm not particularly confrontational or particular about bf (I've ebf, mixed and ff equally loved children) but it got my back up a bit. I didn't flash her, was polite, as were the children (though I doubt they would have been stuffed into a small room with nowt to look at) and it was easier for all than listening to a screaming baby.

My sister, mum and friend all maintain it is unreasonable to publically feed unless you must, and stores provide a feeding room so people like me don't take up space feeding or put off others shopping. Yet even the dad on his own didn't look fussed when he came over (I think noone noticed). They say I may have put of business and it's just inconsiderate.

YANBU I would have done exactly the same.

When DD1 was tiny I was very grateful for feeding rooms as I did feel self conscious, particularly if I was out on my own. With DD2 my main requirement is a cup of tea to drink at the same time.......

Weird. You were feeding your baby. Why on earth would anyone object? Weird. Just weird.
Oh and YY to baby feeding spaces being rank. Often right next to an overflowing nappy bin or changing station where someone is deshitting their DC!

thank god as far as I can see only one idiot poster has said yabu. because you weren't. and whoever said the assistant wouldn't have batted an eyelid had you given your baby a bottle, i wholeheartedly agree with you. it's quite appalling actually.

Its up to you to feed where you want and the staff member isnt aware of this - she is not trained and thinks you should be in there because that's what its for.

Therefore you need a stinking letter to clarkes. Its not her fault, its the training.

God, we have regressed to the blimmin' dark ages.

Of course YANBU!!!

Playing Devil's Advocate, I would find it very hard to serve a customer who was feeding a child with a bowl and spoon so perhaps shop assistants find it hard to do their job to the required standard when they're being asked to deal with someone who is breastfeeding?

That said, it's hard to serve someone who is texting, talking on a phone, dealing with a child having a tantrum, etc. Where would you draw the line? But obviously this is a well rehearsed debate!

You can breast or bottle feed a child and still carry on a conversation with a shop assistant - why would you find them hard to serve?

I personally find it distracting in the same way it's distracting if someone is texting while in a conversation or playing computer games while you're talking to them.

I don't find feeding a child disgusting or offensive but when someone is talking to me I find it easier if they're focussing on the conversation as much as they possibly can.

The same principle applies to lots of things people could do while talking to someone else.

but texting or playing gamws requireyou ti look away. Breastfeedinf does not. It also does not require attention in the way composing a text does

Have you actually seen someone feed a baby? It's not like you have to concentrate on it like you do on texting

I think someone working in a kids' shoe shop would have to be able to do their job even without having the customer's attention completely focussed on them.

Yanbu

StealthPolarBear, composing a message on MN also seems to require a some concentration.

YANBU.

The feeding room's there for if you want to use it, not somewhere that you're obliged to use.

YANBU

I used to feed DS2 in the sling because it meant I could carry on doing what I was doing before he needed feeding, rather than having to sit down somewhere and waste a whole load of time.

DS2 was permanently hungry, so if I'd taken myself to a feeding room every time he needed feeding, they'd have been charging me rent.

I got a woman tutting and huffing at me in soft play on my first solo outing with both DSs, despite there being absolutely nothing to see because of the sling, but other than that, no-one ever seemed mortally offended.

An elderly lady did once get an eyeful over the cheese in Sainsburys when she said 'ooh, let's have a look at the baby' and dived in before I could warn her, but she just looked startled, and then laughed and apologised.

Everything's been said,
Just adding my YANBU.

It does fantissue :) but that doesnt detract from my point. Texting while being served at a checkout is rude. Breastfeeding while being served is not.
do you jave anything to say about the content of what I wrote or just its delivery?

No, I javen't

And I didn't say it was rude, I said that some people, rightly or wrongly, find it distracting.

Ok. Id have expected you to either agree or disagree butfair eenough. Btw am on phone with incredibly small keys and for some teason it refuses to put a space after a word if it's at the end of a line. But feel free to correct any errors as it seems to make you feel better.

Ah so you did have a response. Thank you.

Yanbu I wpuld and have done the same, why traipse to a feedimg room if you dont want or need to, esp with other kdis in tow!

I woud be writimg to them to point out the law re bfeeding.

In fairness the assistant didnt do anything illegal.
lobe the fact she continued grumpily tho - putting off customers, exactly what she accised the op of doing!

I just wanted to add my YANBU not one little bit.
You can use the feeding room if you want but you certainly don't have to.
Your choice. I would write and tell about your experiences.