to have used the disabled loo?

[HighwayRat]

I went to the supermarket earlier and needed a wee, I have ms and scoliosis and have been suffering the last few days with a relapse and back pain so need the rails to lift myself on and off the loo (I use the sink and looroll holder at home so have been managing well) anyway I came out and a woman in a wheelchair was waiting she looked me up and down and said 'you know this is a disabled toilet' I said 'yes' to which she said 'well you dont look disabled' well Im not proud of it but I said 'well you dont look like a twat but here we are' and walked off.

But it got me thinking, I could have used the normal loos - I normally do but today was a bad day - it would have been a lot more awkward but I could have done. I can legitimately use the disabled toilet but should they be left for those with more urgent or obvious mobility/disabilities? How do you deal with people who assume you are fine and just taking the piss using the disabled facilities?

I think a disabled loo is there so disabled people can go to the loo. How did having to wait 3 minutes change that? Girl in wheelchair had to queue for a public loo like we all often do. I don't see the problem. I often use a disabled toilet if I have the buggy with me (can leave baby unattended outside cubicle) or loads of bags or a suitcase or simply if it looked clean and was the first loo I came across.

droflove RTFT dear...if that doesn't answer your spectacularly ignorant question then come back and post it again....

Thanks Ice. I didnt have energy to type about my DD not being able to wait again.

Some people are so ignorant and selfish.

while we are at it...some children with as yet undiagnosed diabilities use the pushchair far longer than considered acceptable on mn and need to be in the cubicle with a parent.

Hi Ice, dear. Dunno what RTFT means.

Read the full thread

Needsasock, clearly you wouldn't have any issues being challenged!

What would you suggest for people who struggle with confrontation or who may not have the verbal skills to be able to tell someone to fuck off?

Tbh I quite approve of the op's response,

But your right no reason why people who wanted to use a card couldn't as long as those who did not want to didn't have to

I do. I probably would have told her I needed the grab bars due to a bad back though, not insulted her.

When I was pg last time I had horrendous SPD and was strapped up, in a wheelchair and in agony. I used disable parking spaces and toilets. I wouldn't begrudge anyone else doing the same.

Proud why on earth would you look around the room and say it doesn't look like there are any invalids in. That was my point exactly.

My mother in law has to self catheterise to go to the toilet and so is told to use the disabled toilets as the sink etc is in there so she can wash her hands immediately beforehand.

I also had a friend at school who had a bag for urine that she had to change over and again needed to wash her hands and also change an incontienence nappy.

Both of these people appear fine and healthy but have complex urinary issues that they probably dont want to be shuffling around in a tiny cubicle trying to sort out.

In my old workplace we had a lady undergoing gender reassignment (apologies if thats the wrong term)and still had a penis. She had to be assigned a genderless toilet which by definition meant the "disabled" toilet.

There are many reasons why someone may need to use the disabled toilet. YANBU

Oh god, no, needasock, definitely shouldn't be an across the board thing. I was just thinking

I hope nobody ever confronts my grandmother. She'd probably burst into tears and not want to leave the house ever again if someone confronted her because she didn't look disabled enough. (She can't always get herself back up off the loo without a handrail, due to multiple health issues, but she doesn't look disabled unless she's using a stick, just elderly.)

The doctors wife, did she request a separate loo or did hr say she needed one?

Girl in wheelchair had to queue for a public loo like we all often do. I don't see the problem.
Gosh, what a clever and thoughtful little bunny you are. Let me tell you what happens when I (girl in wheelchair) wait three minutes. By that time I will have pissed myself, I have psoriasis, so the amonia in my urine starts breaking down my broken skin which will result in ulcers, big, sore painful ulcers on my fanny, my thighs and my arse. I have psoriasis so said ulcers will become infected which results in hospital treatment. In the short term I am 17 and you want me to wait so that I can bomb round town with my mates stinking of piss. That's so kind of you Droflove, do let me be your friend.

Dawndonna's dd.

I can't believe people are so ignorant that they try to judge whether someone is disabled just by looking at them, and then be so rude as to comment!!
OP I would have been inclined to go much further and say ' I have MS you rude twat, try keeping your ignorant nose out in future'

OTT? I don't think so!

I am laughing at anyone thinking of my DD as an "invalid". I'd kill for half her energy.

My friend is not disabled but does have a colostomy bag. She uses the disabled loo occasionally when she needs to sort it out, as disabled loos offer both privacy and hand-washing facilities.

I don't see she has much choice really (other than never going out).

Barbarian that really does count as a need, of course she has no other choice.

Bernice it was recommended as part of her occupational health recommendations so she would feel comfortable in the workplace until she was post op. Also supported by her union and our HR.

Ah right, so it was her choice supported by hr? I didn't like to think she'd been told that she must use a specific loo, when she'd have preferred to use the ladies.

This thread makes me stressed. I have IBS and have had numerous investigations and treatments for it, but seems to be one of those things. If I need to go I need to go, I get hot and embarassed and nearly start crying.

If there is a disabled loo I will use it, sometimes at the expense of a normal cubical loo, where the whole world is about to hear an almighty explosion, that jsut makes me feel even worse and sometimes i've been so embarassed I'll go home crying!

To now read that I should stop going into a disabled loo and feel ashamed for doing so is making me question ever leaving the house again.

I've been reassured that anyone can use the accesible toilet if they like and there's no actual law against it thank you very much. I think if anyone ever questions me I'll man up and say would you like to be witness to the inner workings of my intestines? :(

allthatglitters IBS is a disability, who is telling you not to use it?

I get claustrophobia and feel faint in the little stalls, so I always go for the bigger loos, whether they are accessible, or disabled. I'm also having a flare up of IBSd at the moment so have to go when I have to go.

But I don't look disabled, in that I don't have a stick, seeing eye dog or monility chair.

I think you might have given the lady in the chair something to think about actually. It's good to be challenged if you've narrow thinking.

Yanbu!

I agree with Dawn. Don't feel guilty Allthatglitters