Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to think this is a bit cheeky or do I need to relax a bit?

251 replies

NotActuallyAMum · 17/03/2014 12:36

A work colleague of mine did me a favour recently – saved us about £50 – so as a thank you I offered him a couple of nights in our static caravan. I said that if he goes straight there after work on a Friday he’ll be there by about half 6 then if he leaves around the same time on Sunday he’ll have 2 full days there. I warned him that we wouldn’t be moving our belongings out of the way because there’ll still be plenty of room for the two of them. He took me up on the offer, which I was pleased about – I wanted to return the favour

I’ve just seen that he’s booked the Friday and Monday of that weekend off work, presumably to spend 4 nights at our caravan instead of the 2 that I offered. Additionally, someone else who works here sees a lot of this person out of work – the two of them and their wives spend a lot of time together and I’ve noticed that he has also booked the Friday and Monday off work, making me think that they are planning on going too

I could be wrong of course but it seems too much of a coincidence for there to be any other explanation. Isn’t this a bit cheeky?

OP posts:
ChazzerChaser · 17/03/2014 12:37

Yep cheeky

PicaK · 17/03/2014 12:40

Gosh you're leaping to conclusions. He could be seeing mates nearby on sun night, stopping en route on friday. The friends having time off could be a coincidence.

Plus it's not like you lose anything here.

I'd keep quiet.

Mrskeylime · 17/03/2014 12:40

Cheeky fecker! Are you going to ask him?

SoleSource · 17/03/2014 12:40

If that is his intention yes. They could be going elsewhere or spending a few days at home.

AnaisB · 17/03/2014 12:41

Maybe he's going Friday morning. You are making a few presumtions there.

JimmyCorkhill · 17/03/2014 12:44

I think it will be impossible to know for sure without asking and that could end up spoiling the original goodwill.

Try looking at it from a different perspective, you have enabled him to have a fantastic weekend with/without his friends. He'll be very grateful for your kindness and this could result in future help from him.

Or you could stay in your caravan Thursday evening and it will be a lovely 'surprise' when they all turn up Grin

Original poster
NotActuallyAMum · 17/03/2014 12:47

Yes I realise I could be wrong but it just seemed a big coincidence. These holidays were booked within a couple of days of our conversation

Am I going to ask him? No I won't say anything but if I do turn out to be right then I will speak up. I will find out either way because whenever we have anyone going (rarely) we always tell the people next door who and for how long and they do the same with us

OP posts:
Original poster
NotActuallyAMum · 17/03/2014 12:48

LOL @ Jimmy Grin if we weren't working I might have done that...

OP posts:
EyelinerQueen · 17/03/2014 12:49

If that's his plan then yes, cheeky is an understatement Shock .

My parents have an apartment in Spain that they let on a casual basis to family. The apartment is gorgeous and my Mum's pride and joy.

A few years ago my cousin booked it for her and her husband.

My mum found out via FB that they'd taken 2 other couples who were complete strangers to my parents without saying a word Hmm .

They won't be using the apartment again.

Daiso · 17/03/2014 12:52

He could have booked the Friday off to leave during the day rather than after work and equally on Sun night he may plan on getting back late so had booked Monday off so he doesn't have to worry about a late night Sun/early start Mon.

MusicalEndorphins · 17/03/2014 12:56

I would have asked you first.

NinjaBunny · 17/03/2014 13:00

Oh, so cheeky.

But it might not be deliberate. I was friends with someone who was always asking completely unreasonable favours ("Could you call in sick and look after my DS so I can go out tonight?" Never occurring to her that her night out would cost me £80 due to the dropped shift.) but I honestly don't think it was on purpose.

I think she just had no idea what was reasonable to ask and what was being massively cheeky.

adeucalione · 17/03/2014 13:03

I don't think it's particularly cheeky of him to travel up on Friday morning instead of Friday evening, but if he is planning to stay the extra night on Sunday, or to take another couple, then that is cheeky.

However, as others have said, he could just fancy Monday off work after being away all weekend, and the other couple might be going somewhere else entirely or be staying at a B&B nearby. Check your facts before jumping to conclusions and looking like a fool over a misunderstanding. Why not just ask what time he's leaving on Sunday because some other friends are staying there on Sunday night?

ShatnersBassoon · 17/03/2014 13:04

Call his bluff and say someone else is going to be stopping on Sunday night.

I'm not convinced that he is being dishonest though. I think you're jumping to conclusions.

itiswhatitiswhatitis · 17/03/2014 13:08

The Friday to Monday thing wouldn't bother me tbh but taking other people would.

Original poster
NotActuallyAMum · 17/03/2014 13:12

I hadn't thought about saying that someone else was there on Sunday (why?!)

I don't plan on saying anything to him beforehand, but I will definitely say something after the event if I do turn out to be right...because if (and I do realise it's definitely IF) I am right then it IS cheeky isn't it? I haven't got that wrong have I?

OP posts:
YellowDinosaur · 17/03/2014 13:12

Are you friends with the other person? Could you ask them as part of normal conversation that you see they have booked a long weekend off, do they have any plans? Plus yes to calling their bluff about the Sunday (although personally a couple of days extra wouldn't bother me anyway if I wasn't going to be there)

Original poster
NotActuallyAMum · 17/03/2014 13:15

YellowDinosaur I don't know this other person at all, we work for a very big Company and I've never met him

OP posts:
Quejica · 17/03/2014 13:17

When and how is he getting the key?

YellowDinosaur · 17/03/2014 13:19

Then I'd do the calling their bluff about the Sunday thing if the number of days bothers you. And ask your neighbours to report back on the rest.

Yes, they are cheeky to do this without asking if they are planning this. I'd personally not care about the extra days if you wouldn't be the anyway but would care about 2 people I didn't know staying there without being asked.

WaitMonkey · 17/03/2014 13:19

I would need to ask.

DebbieOfMaddox · 17/03/2014 13:23

Did you say "two nights" or did you say "a couple of nights" or "a weekend"?

Unless you very specifically said "two nights" then I think going Friday-Monday is fine. It makes no difference to you and is within the accepted sense of "a couple of nights". I don't think that would be cheeky.

Inviting another friend who you don't even know to come along with him without asking you first, though, would be cheeky.

So YAB variously U and NU.

Original poster
NotActuallyAMum · 17/03/2014 13:24

Quejica very good question, as far as I'm concerned I'll bring the key to work with me on the Friday. If he asks if he can have it on the Thursday that really will make me think he's going on Thursday evening

OP posts:
Original poster
NotActuallyAMum · 17/03/2014 13:26

Debbie I did very specifically say that they could go straight from work on Friday and come back on Sunday evening, I know that I definitely said that

Those of you who are saying it doesn't make any difference to us whether they go for 2 or 4 nights do, to be fair, have a point, but I still think they should have asked first

OP posts:
YellowDinosaur · 17/03/2014 13:26

Although of course he'll ask you to bring it on Thursday even if he's not going till Friday if he's taken the Friday off. So that doesn't help you.