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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have smashed an egg on his windscreen

360 replies

lollipoppi · 11/03/2014 19:48

Ok, so I know IABU and it was a spur of the moment childish thing to do but ........

Upon leaving the supermarket with a 1yo and 3yo in tow, I get to my car to find a man struggling to get out of his van because he has parked so close to my car.

I politely pointed out that if he is struggling then how am I expected to get my 3yo into his car seat when I cannot open my door.
His response was "it's not my problem"
Me : well it's now my problem because your an incompetent arse
Him: fuck off you stuck up btch, and walked off with his mate laughing

Whilst my 3yo was climbing over my 1yo to get to his car seat, I unloaded the shopping and came across the eggs.

I splatted one on his windscreen and bombed it

Very immature of me I know, but I think he deserved it!

OP posts:
ZingSweetMango · 13/03/2014 12:21

Nicknacky

have you ever seen "Word's craziest fools" with Mr T?
there was a recorded conversation where a woman called the police that someone stole her snowman!
Grin

VenusDeWillendorf · 13/03/2014 12:29

Women aren't allowed to ask for their needs, then curse, or be angry or egg anyone's car.

We should be mute and allow men to be selfish and kowtow to their every need, expressed or not (gaslighting totally expected and allowed).

Oh wait, no that's not it.

OP I heard that you asked first and then called him an arse, and then threw a (water soluble) egg.

I think you rock.

Nicknacky · 13/03/2014 12:30

No lol!

I did once get called to a drunk woman who wanted me to go see her husband who was five houses away and ask him for the house keys. She didn't want to go herself......and we had to record it as a domestic incident.

Nicknacky · 13/03/2014 12:33

Venus, why make it sound like a sexist incident? Who suggests "kowtow"?

Or maybe we should just expect men, and women to behave themselves. I know, I know that is a radical idea.

ilovesooty · 13/03/2014 12:45

Who has suggested women ought to kowtow? How ridiculous. As Nick says, people of either gender not behaving in an anti social way might be a start.

Catsize · 13/03/2014 13:20

I think I might have just said 'If you'd really like to park there, would you mind just reversing a second so we can get in and then you can go back in the space and have more room to get out when I have left', rather than the 'incompetent arse' stuff. Still, his final comment merited the egg response. Although shame to lose the cost of an egg.
Mind you, I might have used the whole box.
And left a little note 'with love from the stuck up bitch, who upon your recommendation has well and truly f*ed off'.

Nicknacky · 13/03/2014 13:28

Why live life so angry that you imagine what you would have done?

Seriously people get a grip. The guy parked badly. Didn't spit on her pfb.

coco44 · 13/03/2014 16:14

'You'd feel a right fucking nobber, wouldn't you, ringing the police because of a smashed egg on your van?'

No not at all, especially if i had a good idea who had done it.The police in this area would certainly take it seriously.

ilovesooty · 13/03/2014 17:12

I actually asked the police team I work next door to what they'd have done. It would be dependent on whether there was damage, if you knew who'd done it etc and that would form a distinction between Crimea damage and antisocial behaviour. They didn't think you'd be a nobber. They did however reckon gender was irrelevant and people should be able to resolve their differences without resorting to verbal abuse or antisocial behaviour / vandalism.

Toadinthehole · 13/03/2014 17:33

Agree. The overreactions on this thread are something hilarious.

So he parked a bit badly. No need to politely point out meaning, fixing the bloke with a look capable of opening a dozen oysters and, in measured and icy tones making it clear from the outset that he's a prick that his parking is poor.

So OP smashed an egg on his windscreen. Funny, albeit childish. Hardly a matter for the police.

Jeepers. A lot of people here need to lighten up.

MarmaladeShatkins · 13/03/2014 17:37

Did they really, sooty?

gofeminism · 13/03/2014 17:47

Good post Toadinthehole, you'd think from the strange posts here that hurling eggs at peoples property wasn't an entirely appropriate and normal response to some mild annoyance. I'm glad normal people like yourself would find it funny if something you did without thinking annoyed someone and ended up with them hurling eggs at your stuff.

Toadinthehole · 13/03/2014 17:55

If someone egged my car I wouldn't be happy about it. I wouldn't however be going to the police about it, nor would I expect the police to be particularly interested if I did.

If someone coined my car, that would be different as it would require a trip to the paint shop.

I feel like I've dived into a warm pool of passive-aggression by participating in this thread.

Pimpf · 13/03/2014 23:22

Still find it funny that arse is being considered a swear word.

ZingSweetMango · 14/03/2014 00:03

pimpf

I thought it was - if not, it certainly is "classified" as vulgar

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 14/03/2014 00:19

When he said "F**k off you stuck up bitch" was he having a dig at the op for being too polite/ stuck up/ snobby in his opinion?

Maybe the only language he would have responded too would be "Oi , c**t-bubble , shift that heap of trash and take your pet with you"

But I'd have put on a martyred face and squeezed myself between the two vehicles.
Not my fault if my belt has studs and a large metal buckle and in order to get my (quite moderately sized) bottom between the gap, I end up giving his paintwork a pelvic grind..............oops. Clumsy me.

ZingSweetMango · 14/03/2014 07:41

70

pelvic grind!Grin
you crack me up!

Pimpf · 14/03/2014 08:23

Zing, really? Arse is vulgar? Am going to have to check with rl friends how they would rate arse on the level of swear and vulgar words!

And I'm loving how everyone's up in arms about how op escalated things by by cracking an egg on his windscreen. I think he upped it first, when she called him an incompetent arse (nothing wrong with that in my book), he replied with a fuck you you stupid bitch. Nice man.

Op, guessing the police haven't been round yet and hauled you off to prison

Catsize · 14/03/2014 14:04

Another one who hates the word 'arse'. Pimpf, would you feel okay about a 4yr old using it? Hope not!

MeepMeepVrooom · 14/03/2014 14:14

Just because you wouldn't want a 4 year old using a word doesn't make it vulgar.

I wouldn't want a 4 year old saying for gods sake or what the hell or a million other things but I don't find it offensive when said by others.

Pimpf · 14/03/2014 14:29

No I wouldn't want to hear my children say it, doesn't make it vulgar though. And her calling him an arse doesn't no warrant him saying fuck off you stupid bitch. He's a nasty bully and got what he deserved, I hope it did inconvenience him and his mates had a good laugh at him

ZingSweetMango · 14/03/2014 14:46

pimpf

yep. look it up in a dictionary.
it's vulgar slang!

blahblahblah2014 · 14/03/2014 14:49

I don't agree with all of this but official guidelines for censorship in the uk are as follows:

The BBFC categories of swear words:

Very mild: damn, hell, God, sod

Mild: bloody, bastard, piss, pissed, shit, son-of-a-bitch, bugger, bollocks, screw, crap, arse, shag, slag, slut, whote, arsehole, tosser, Jesus, Christ

Moderate: wanker, prick, bitch

Strong: fuck

Coarse: stronger sexual swearwords

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 14/03/2014 14:54

How on earth does sod get into the mild category when it's short for sodomise?

I know you didn't invent the catergories..........

slithytove · 14/03/2014 15:22

Bitch is worse than shit? And being a son of a bitch isn't as bad as being a bitch? Grin

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