Have name changed for two reasons
1/ I expect to be told I'm the biggest cow ever
2/ this might out me under my usual name
Will keep it short and sweet, I'm ill with a throat infection and not slept right for about a week with a teething 8mo that is also chocked with the cold. Dh totally pulls his weight when it comes to sharing night wakening but with me also being Ill it's been a rough week.
I had four hours sleep last night and four the night before. I don't cope well without sleep so this could be why I'm a grumpy cow.
Dh has the most fucked up family ever! It's no secret I don't like them much, his grandad is looking likely to pass away soon. Dh has seen him four times in the last 14 years and the last time he laid into dh about how much of a dissapointment he was to him (no reason at all for this)
Dh also has a weird relationship with his mum, shit childhood that he holds a lot of resentment for but anytime she shouts jump he shouts how high!
He's been there 4 hours now after getting a call to say he had to go to the grandads house as it was near the end. One dc is down with d&v the other is still screaming with her gums and I'm ready to stick my head in the oven.
Is this really one of these situations I need to put up and shut up even given the family history or can I be pissed of?
Anyway if you made it this far well done! I feel I bit better for my rant.
AIBU?
To be pissed off that dh is with a dying relative?
Littlebitofwine · 08/03/2014 17:20
OP. you're allowed to be grumpy when you're feeling rotten and having to look after sick children as well.
You poor thing! You surely are allowed to have a moan when you feel like hell and are in charge of the DC! Nothing to be done about dh as he obviously must be with his grandfather at this time.
Why don't you put the children to bed early, get in your pyjammas and snuggle up in bed with kindle or tv? 
It's sad about your DH's grandfather and I agree with others that other people have to be thought about in these circumstances even though you feel the way you do. Do you feel guilty in that you can't help?
The grandfather will be pleased to have family around him for what he probably know is his end coming.
Your DH's mother probably welcomes the support that your DH is giving her. Have you lost your parents yet? If not, you don't know what it feels like so DH's mother will be thankful for his being with her as well as with his grandad. She might be mentally thanking you for letting her son be with her.
Your DH might be tying up loose emotional ends (guilt, forgotten friendship, happy memories?)
You will recover from your problem and your DCs will eventually be 100% again. Your DFH's grandad will not. If your DH hadn't gone, he would have regretted it for the rest of his life, whatever he thought about his grandad.
You may choose between 
or 
and I'll throw in a piece of 
.
MN is the right place for a rant.
But you are being U.
Grandfather will only die once & your DH may feel he needs to be there.
The resentment that might come if you stopped him from being there could be huge.
I am sorry you have a nasty virus & have not slept - I've been there & it is truly shit - but I think you are going to have to put up with this one.
I also send you either or - and I'd go for the latter!
Thanks everyone 
Of course I'm not saying any of this to dp! That's why I'm ranting in here. I think the world of him for what's he doing really, Its just the fact it's his family and even though I'm not going to drip feed now I've been told how unreasonable I am it's probably obvious there are issues between us.
Dc are finally in bed, one with a fat lip after falling and hitting it of the stairgate and the other with a nappy squeezed onto her as she still has a bit of a dodgy tummy.
Away to get my own head down now and hope they sleep well.
Well I didn't think you were being unreasonable - living people you love and need to care for always come first - before old gits who have spent their lives causing you grief.
But you're right, you're dh is doing the right thing for him.
And it's very good of you to support him by doing all the childcare while ill
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