AIBU to think parents should teach their children how to be around dogs?

[Glitteryconverse]

I have two young children and a dog. My dog is very gentle and tolerant and plays so nicely with my children. Her negatives are that she is quite a barky dog (non-aggressive, just vocal) and tends to jump up at people in excitement. She also is easily scared and will jump out of her skin if she is busy sniffing and then suddenly notices another dog/person/leaf next to her. With that in mind, if a child approaches, I always squat down with her to stop her jumping up and keep her calm and explain to the child that she is very gentle but gets very excited. If I take her on the school run and have to tie her to the fence outside the playground, I always put her at the furthest point from the gate so she is away from everyone (there is a really yappy dog that is usually there anyway!). The only way to have contact with her like this is if you come off the pavement and climb up a small grass bank to get to her.

Today she came on the school run and I tied her in her usual place. When I came out of school one of the mums was waiting for me and said that from the playground she had seen a small child run up to my dog and that my dog seemed to snap at her. She wasn't sure of the exact details but said that the little girl had cried and gone off with her mum and so she wanted to let me know in case anything was said later.

I would bet my house that my dog didn't bite the child, I really would. What I suspect happened is that the child ran up the bank to my dog and made her jump which made her bark, or that she jumped up at the child. I have always taught my children that they are to ask the owner before they stroke a dog and to let it sniff their fingers first as you just never know what a dog is like. I'm a bit worried in case I am going to get told off my someone for this!

AIBU to think that IF my dog had snapped at the child, then it wasn't my dog's fault considering that she was well out of the way and had been approached by a stranger? What else could I have done (other than left her at home!)

Yes YWBU, you know your dog has behavioir issues, you (hopefully) got away with it without serious incident.

I've never understood why people have to parade their dogs on the school run anyway.

Hahaha!!!! I wasn't 'parading' her, I was walking her and at the same time taking my children to school!

So you left your poorly-trained (ie one that barks at and jumps up at people) dog unattended outside the school and it's somehow someone else's fault when it displayed the kind of behaviour that you say it often does? YABU.

I definately think ALL parents should teach their kids to always ask to stroke dogs and to not approach unattended dogs. And also how to behave around dogs. Remaining calm, no running up, stroking nicely , no loud squealing etc.

But dogs shouldn't really be left unattended in public places although from the sound of it you have done your best to keep her as far away as possible. But may jut e easier to leave at home to avoid the hassle.

Not just because someone may approach and and she may get scared and jump, but also because people can be mean and pone them with sticks or wind them up etc.

I love dogs and my dds love dogs and I have worked hard to instill the importance of admiring from afar and to ALWaYS ask before touching and taught them how to stroke pets gently.

YANBU for thinking parents should educate their children (although many probably aren't sure themselves of how best to do this), but YABU for leaving your dog where a child could get to it. Knowing that many children do not have good dog safety, you should be responsible enough to take measures to ensure that your dog isn't in a position where it could do something that could mean it is put down.

YABU. You shouldn't leave an excitable dog unattended outside a school.

Just popping up again with another thought: if a child has sight, hearing, learning or other needs you cannot guarantee they'll see and react to the dog appropriately. I just think "better safe than sorry".

The very youngest at most primaries wouldn't all be au fait with 'cause and effect' - so just because it has been said, doesn't mean children (not out of naughtiness) will obey.

...and I say that as someone who doesn't hear too well and has developed episodes of sensory overload. I can 'not see' or not hear things in a way which sometimes shocks me. Can only imagine for a child.

yes children should be taught how to behave around animals

but outside a school tied up is no place for a yappy dog foolish to think children will not be interested and children do not always do what they are told or taught to do

take it to the park or a common for its exercise

dogs are tied up outside ds school there has been a few complaints but the dog owners think their dogs have the right to be there

YANBU, I have a child and a dog and I always say that she must ask the owner before stroking a dog as some dogs aren't like our dog and don't like to be stroked etc.

But people don't. Lack of common sense? Understanding of dogs?

And some dog owners lack understanding of children and have no common sense.It works both ways.
Dogs should not be tied up and left unattended.

Onus is on the dog owner to ensure that the dog isn't put in a position where it will be approached unsupervised by anyone who doesn't know how to be around dogs. I have what I beleive to the gentlest dog imaginable but I still don't take risks. For the dog's sake as much as anything.

I am back from the afternoon school run sans dog and can happily report that the child had no holes in her face! Apparently nothing even happened - the little girl went vaguely near my dog and got told off for standing in the mud, hence the crying!

You could have left your dog at home. Full stop. As a mother of a child who is irrationally frightened of dogs I'm sick to death of dogs being brought to school and to children's play areas. I'm doing everything I can to help him get over his fear but it's not helped when a safe place like school is compromised by selfish people bringing their dogs.
Our trip to the park last weekend was ruined by people allowing their dogs off the lead in the children's play area. Poor ds had gone to play in a maze and two dogs ran in. He was beside himself.

why take you dog on the school run if it is a nervous dog

seems like an accident waiting to happen

there is just no need for dogs to be everywhere just because dog owners like their dogs to accompany them at all times

Sorry hadn't seen your latest reply. Glad you left the dog at home.

I quite like seeing all the dogs at school. But I can understand how it would not be fun if your child were scared of dogs.

If one more dog owner tells DC3 (who is nervous around dogs as a result of being knocked over by a big, bouncy mutt when he was little) that the dog won't bite and that it's just being friend when it jumps up and barks then I will fucking scream. Or worse. Seriously.

DC3 does not want a canine friend, he has real, living ones. Children trump dogs in the vast majority of cases, and it's not up to him to learn how to 'behave' around dogs. Unless he's winding the dog up deliberately (which he doesn't) then it's up to you to keep your dog under control or away from situations it can't cope with.

Yabu

As a dog owner, I would not leave my dog tied up.

She gets excited about kids, and wants to jump up, so that means, sadly I cannot let her off the lead.Until she has learned not to.

Dog is super friendly, but I think it is my job to (try to!) train her not to jump up.

I walks her past a school occasionally to get her used to screaming and shouting kids, and children running up to her.

If I saw a dog tied up at school gate, unsupervised, I would assume it was a super chilled out dog, otherwise, the owner surely would not have left her??

SirChenjin my pet hate is "don't be scared they can smell fear it makes them more likely to bite". I was told this frequently as a child. Also "Do you hate animals?" as if I was the aggressor.

It is not going to make the child less frightened. It is going to get them into a cycle of more and more fear.

Saying "The dog can't talk, if you act upset and worried, he may get upset and worried too. Stand calmly with mum" is a far better phrasing.

But I found nothing enrages some adult dog owners than a child who is scared because they were bitten by another dog another time! Complete empathy fail, especially when you turn down their offer to play (because they fricken told you it can smell fear!!).

YABU, I have lost count of the amount of times a dog has run and jumped all over my toddler. He's always with me, and generally just toddling along the path in the park. The feckless owners seem to have no control over their dogs, can't call them back and generally are useless. Dogs shouldn't be off the lead unless the owner can control them adequately.

She wasn't off the lead Tribble

And re 'smelling fear' my riding instructor used to bark that at me when I first learnt to ride, hence me panicking for feeling nervous in the first place and ending up a gibbering wreck!

Really pisses me off this - bloody dogs tied up the whole length of the road up to our school - i love dogs, dd loves dogs, we have two dogs - but i really worry about all the toddlers who are face height to most of these dogs - dogs generally don't like it when people get in their faces, with toddlers this is often unavoidable. Its an accident waiting to happen.