To have just shouted at a horse rider outside my house

[BigRedBall]

Have namechanged for privacy.

I am so angry right now. We sometimes (twice a year at most) get horses going past our house as we live around the corner from a small private farm. We live in a city, so it's quite a novelty when we hear the sound of "clip clop" outside.

About 20 mins ago we heard the sound of clip clop and I took DS to the front room to look outside. As we watched the horses go by one stopped and kind of turned around and SHITTED RIGHT OUTSIDE MY DRIVEWAY. Not a small bit...a big arse full of horse shit. And the rider laughed at her other horsey friends.

As soon as I saw it I put my shoes on and ran outside and the rider was going on her way again. Her friends had gone up ahead. I ran up to her shouting "excuse me" and she wouldn't stop. I shouted at her if she was going to clear up the horse poo outside my house and she replied "stop shouting at me" without even turning around to see I had a toddler in my arms.

I couldn't go any further because I was holding my DS and had left a sleeping baby inside.

Now I have a pile of horse shit outside my house, and I want to actually KILL this horse rider. Our road is a school route and I don't want children stepping in it but why the fuck should I have to clear it up? I am so pissed off. I want to get into the car and hunt down the fuckers and pull them back by their ears and tell them to clean it.

bigredball your thread has provided so many people with so much entertainment and I think you should be rewarded with a selection of really lovely rose bushes to plant. You can then nourish them with any free and full-of-goodness horse dung that comes your way.

Coruskate that's a good idea. I think I shall employ that after my barrage of abuse from fullerlonger as stated above- since the original vitriolic post was removed. I like your style.

We could also have horse poo recipes? It's gotta be good right, it's natural. With road kill starter.

BigRed you're just not trying, there must be something you want to tip horse shit on??

X -posted.Sorry. Incredibly slow and lousy typist on neurotic keyboard

My mare pisses when I whistle

She also shits with no regard for stray toddlers/bikes/weirdy pedestrians on public highways

I typed 'how to train a horse to poo on grass' into google & google laughed at me.

Although I did learn that some people plant lush grass in areas they don't want horses to poo on as horses prefer to eat lush grass than poo on it. So there we go. Grass the roads with laminitis risking lush spring grass & problem solved.

It has nothing to do with natural. Dog shit isn't unnatural, it's just unpleasant. It relates both to diet and the adaptations of that species' digestive tract / flora.

FWIW, if I had to eat a shit sandwich, I would go for horse shit on granary, with mustard, cucumber and tomatoes

And I choose not to agree with the lot of them, Corus. There are many words and phrases which are not acceptable today. I personally do not believe nutters is one of them. Retards is another matter and I would highlight the fact that I haven't used that term on here.

Wombat muck is very dry and inoffensive.

The horses shit on her road once or twice a year. Big deal.

Diseaseofthesheep how does unhinged strike you?

Shonajoy i don't care about the general publics opinion on horseriders.

The law is on our side. We don't have to clean it up. For good reason. Get over it. Its not a big deal.

Shonajoy There are hazards on the road.

For bikers the biggest hazard are car drivers, wouldn't you say?

Then there are pot holes, oil slicks, mud and gravel.

Then there is shit. Cow shit is slipperier than horse shit, I find. And when it occurs, there tends to be a lot more of it. But cow farmers are entitled to exist and cross the road.

So why don't you watch out in areas of cow farming country because there are always signs up warning you of that?

If you want to study shit I can highly recommend The Mole who knew it was none of his business. Its an excellent study in the different types of poo there are.

Or lunatic? Is that okay too?

Flockoftwats I don't care about your opinion, just get over it, what's the good reason? You REALLY eat the stuff!?

Limitedperiod I live nearly rural, and use a LOT of country roads. I've YET to see a sign. And in cow farming country the farmer IS legally obliged to clean up any road mess they leave behind. Yes, car drivers driven by angry people because motorbikes are allowed by law to filter and get to the front of the queue faster are lethal as well. When my bike starts leaving huge chunks of mess that damage your car, I will put a sign up, cos that makes it ok.

I'd never use the word retard. My son is retarded (well that's what it would be called in the States). He went horse riding with school today incidentally.

Just an observation, seems to be a lot of people now just being angry rather than actually debating the issue- ones that haven't been involved in the debate till now. I haven't been here this long, is it all mates trying to gang up lol!?

I thought farmers were supposed to clean muck up from roads?

Tbh if you compared number of horses & riders killed by bikers versus number of bikers killed by horse poo I suspect the bike would be more lethal than the poo.

I think this bike stuff is a bit of a tangent really. Riders can't shovel shit while riding it's not possible. Bikers need to be aware of additional hazards on lanes.

Saintlyjimjams you didn't look very hard did you?

www.newrider.com/forum/archive/index.php/t-67953.html

One of many describing how horses can be trained to toilet on command, racehorses too.

Shona here's a and some there really are always going to be dangers on the roads for bikes especially,I honestly think horse shit in particular is the least of them.