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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To feel like the worlds worst mother for considering taking ds to nursery today. WWYD

45 replies

Filimou · 20/02/2014 07:30

DS (3) sent home yesterday morning as he was sick. Was sick again at lunchtime but been fine ever since, playing around ate some crackers.
This morning he seems fine again playing around but hasnt had any breakfast (drank a large glass of milk though).
Tells you hes better then tells you hes not.
The whole time he was sick he didnt have a temp or seem ill (usually goes quiet/sleepy just generally not himself) so likely hed eaten something his body didnt like.
Heres the awful part. I have massive work pressure at the moment and a huge deadline tomorrow.I can work at home today (two mins walk from nursery). DH only one in so cant take day off and I have noone else to ask.
I just want to cry because I dont know what to do for the best.
I cant realistically work at home with ds here either. ARGH!!!!!!

OP posts:

Morgause · 20/02/2014 07:31

I think it would be unfair on the other DCs at the nursery if he's still infectious (which is likely) - the nursery may say no anyway.

Suddengeekgirl · 20/02/2014 07:34

I doubt nursery will take him - it's usually a 48h rule for all nurseries I know.

Cbeebies and sticker books might buy you some time to get work done from home.

Waggamamma · 20/02/2014 07:35

YABU. the nursery will likely have a 48hour rule and won't be able to have him back until 48hrs after the last time he vomited.

It's not fair to spread a bug around the other children, parents and staff. It will affect some worse than others.

FloppyPoppyCocky · 20/02/2014 07:36

He needs to stay at home for 48 hours so that he doesn't potentially infect other children whose parents are equally busy with work I imagine. Or members of staff who will have to take time off.

enjolraslove · 20/02/2014 07:36

It is horrible and soooo frustrating. I really feel for you, though it does sound like he isn't quite right yet. My question though would be will they even take him? If they knew he was sick our nursery would refuse.
If not can you dig out DVDs? Even go and buy some new ones?
Or think of someone who could at least have him for a couple of hours? Most people would be happy to help I'm sure.

ForgettableTampon · 20/02/2014 07:37

Yes 48 hr rule should be in place

keep him home. Ugh for the pressures on you.

no grandparents?

AlwaysDancing1234 · 20/02/2014 07:37

If he was sick yesterday the nursery may not even let you leave him, at our nursery the rules were 48 hours for any sickness or bad tummy etc. I have been in your position more than once so can sympathise b(and I didn't have option to work from home) but it wouldn't really be fair on your DS and the other kids in nursery to send him in today.

twojumpingbeans · 20/02/2014 07:39

He really needs to stay at home for the others in nursery, though of course he probably got it there.. Completely understand the horrible stress of trying to organise work around poorly kids :(

GoingToBedfordshire · 20/02/2014 07:39

Really feel for you, it's a shit situation.
Please keep him off today though - you can't be certain it's not a bug and if it is, they are very contagious.

QueenofLouisiana · 20/02/2014 07:40

I don't think they'll take him either- at school I'd gave to ask you to take a child home if they ad been sick in the last 48 hours (and I'm a working mum so I know what difficulties it causes).

Try a free trial of Netflix? Loads of children's stuff there- remember to cancel before they charge you though!

lastnightopenedmyeyes · 20/02/2014 07:40

If imagine the nursery will turn you away if you try and take him. You must give it 48 hours, otherwise he will spread this which is really unfair on everybody else.

JupiterGentlefly · 20/02/2014 07:41

Look at it this way.. if you take today off and he is clear he can go in tomorrow. If you take him today and he yaks you will lose today AND tomorrow. Not fair on anyone for him to go in. I always took mine in if they had colds etc but never when sick.

RubyrooUK · 20/02/2014 07:43

I'm afraid you have to crack out with DVDs and do your best with DS at home. I am also under a hideous amount of work pressure and had to take off time last week when DS1 caught a bug at nursery from his friend. If he caught another one because someone brought in a child who had been sick, I would be gutted. It doesn't help anyone to send a sick child into nursery.

MrsCampbellBlack · 20/02/2014 07:46

Agree with everyone, the nursery will expect you to keep him off for 48 hours after the last vomiting incident.

So yes put on cbeebies and try to work at the same time or could your partner (if you have one) take the day off instead if you are on a deadline?

AndMiffyWentToSleep · 20/02/2014 07:47

Oh I've had this dilemma many times - it is awful. DVDs are my trick (he doesn't get to watch much unless he's ill!).

LillyAlien · 20/02/2014 07:48

Aaah why can't three year olds answer questions properly? I feel for your OP. Mine seems to choose either 'Yes' or 'No' before the start of each conversation and then use it exclusively for all questions.

Only1scoop · 20/02/2014 07:51

Nursery will query it if you take him....as he could be contagious.

LiegeAndLief · 20/02/2014 07:53

Had a similar incident with ds last week, but couldn't have taken him in even if I'd wanted to due to the 48 hr rule. Would be very surprised if your nursery didn't have this.

I sympathise, it's tough juggling sick children and work pressure.

HamAlive · 20/02/2014 07:58

It is hard but the 48hr rule is there for a reason. DS was sent home after a watery poo last week despite being otherwise fine. We thought it might've been a food thing, no other incidents, no temp, eating fine, but then 2 others came down with it and much worse than DS.

You need to keep him home.

WaitMonkey · 20/02/2014 07:58

YABU. I hope the nursery won't take him, it wouldn't be fair on the other dc. These thing's happen, you or his dad will have to look after him.

inlawsareasses · 20/02/2014 08:04

Mine was once sick at school because she was sat next to the bin with all the leftovers/slop going in, 48 hrs off school- not a bug just weak stomached! That was annoying!

Tailtwister · 20/02/2014 08:08

As others have said, the nursery won't take him today anyway.

The only think you can do is try and do your best with working from home today. Is there anyone you can ask to support you in the office to ease the pressure a bit? if people know you're up against it but doing your best to meet your work commitments anyway, they're usually quite helpful.

When one of ours is sick I make a nest in my office for them and give them the iPad (with headphones). I've had a couple of dodgy moments during client calls, but mostly people are understanding if you explain the situation beforehand.

Good luck!

Original poster

Filimou · 20/02/2014 08:09

I think I knew as soon as I had typed it I was BU.
Ive taken today off...kind of. DH cant take the day off, he works in an office with one other person and they never work school holidays (soon as leave is available to book they take christmas, half terms/easter and bits of summer hols).
DHs mum/dad (his only family) cant take him as they both work and all of my family live the best part of 200 miles away.
Dh can finish at 4, will be home by 430 so I can plod on with my report when he gets home.

OP posts:

WoodBurnerBabe · 20/02/2014 08:10

Sorry, I think you'll find nursery won't take him. 48 hours is the usual rule. It does suck, I have similar work issues sometimes, and there is no good solution in my experience...

Littlefish · 20/02/2014 08:11

Please don't even consider taking him in. It is quite horrifying the speed at which a vomiting or diarrhea bug is passed around a nursery setting.

Last half term almost half the children and all the staff in the nursery where I work caught it. We still had parents trying to bring their child back the day after a omitting incident, telling us it was just excitement/something they ate/because they were coughing.

Please keep your ds off for 48 hours after the last incident - so, that would be Friday afternoon for your ds.

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