To expect a playdate to mean playing not staring at a screen

[PhoebeMcPeePee]

My DC were at friends for tea today for a total of 3 hours & bar a short break for tea spent the entire time playing on a DS/iPad/laptop or watching TV
AIBU to think if you invite a child over to play there should be at least some (if not all in the case of youngest age 4) actually playing . Both now completely wired & grumpy not to mention annoyed at me because I won't let them watch some tv as agreed earlier in the day. Would it be really rude to ask a parent not to allow screen time when I drop off?

Haha kingROllo your posts have made me laugh

I encourage screens as this makes interaction between playmates less likely.

I have 5 DCs and the TV was never off. The younger ones lost friends because their humourless parents weren't able to wrap their minds around the fact that children aged 8 and up do not like puddle jumping as much as you might think and prefer their x box or children's programmes. I heard through the grapevine there were dire predictions about how the DCs would all turn out because of their daily diet of claptrap.

LOL, it turned out being able to stay glued to a TV all afternoon provided great practice for paying attention to teachers in high school.

The more time they spend on screens the less likely the hyperactive child visitors are to spend their time wrecking your home. I would actively encourage screen time and would provide a range of electrical goods, all fully charged if it were me.

at Russianblu. You are my kind of parent.

God, if I tried to get 9 year old ds and his friends to go puddle jumping they'd look at me like I was deranged.

We had a friend over for several hours - they played minecraft, they played lego, they ate lunch - they stayed out of my hair whilst I did some work.

Friend had a child dropped off for a 24 hour 'playdate' and was instructed no screentime at all. That was a fun 24 hours for her.

Id have instructed them to take the child back home mrs Campbell@

Hate the term "play date_". When I was little it was "going for tea". Admittedly there was not much in the way of computer games then,but we would still watch a bit of telly !

I just left it to them. The whole point in having a friend around is for them to entertain each other. I provide space and tea, I am not entertainments manager!

I think you should be grateful for the free childcare tbh.

And I'm usually very strict about screens.

Free childcare isn't really my motivation for agreeing to them visting a friend as I'm a childminder so hardly sitting with my feet up when my DC are out .

I'm not moaning about the fact they went on an ipad or watched a bit of TV as I fully expect it for some of the time especially with minecraft obsessed DS1 (8) what I am narked about is a full 3 hours (is that really too long to have another child in your house?) doing nothing BUT staring at a screen of some description.

Yes, YABU. Remember the good ol' days when we were kids, and we got to choose how we spent our playtime?

Next time, pay a childminder if you want edumacational ops.

It's not just 'staring at the screen'. It's a truly dumb child that can't learn something from every experience he or she encounters.

If you watch TV do you just stare at the screen and come away with nothing?

My DCs and their friends can recite entire episodes of the Simpsons and Arthur thanks to their hours logged in front of the screen. DD1 wrote her university application essay based on the character of Lisa Simpson. The DCs found something in common with their Irish and English cousins thanks to a shared love for various TV programmes.

I think your DC will soon clue up with not telling you what he has done if you are going to want control when you are not there.

Meh. I don't usually allow DS three hours in a row of screen time, nor do I usually let him have much or any when he's got friend D's over. But if he were at someone else's house and that's what they did I probably wouldn't mind, as long as he wasn't watching anything inappropriate.

Is this the same mn as I usually log into?

It's a shame some children need to be doing something their parent considers constructive or worthwhile every minute of the day. In my opinion, that is as stifling as rigid activities.

Let them choose for themselves sometimes - they aren't you and they may choose different activities. Does it matter as long as they are safe?

Also, if you consider screen time a waste then who said wasting time is a crime? At their age they can afford 3 hours of 'wasted' time can't they?

Seriously, loosen up!

I an a brilliant mother because I've never limited screentime.they can choose. As such, they watch really little, because it's boring if you're allowed it.

yabu, it would make me feel like supermother .

Stealth :o

If my DD has friends round, they decide what they do and if that means watching films or playing games, that's up to them.

Agree arethereanyleftat all.

My entire parenting is based on reverse psychology cos all mine are right contrary monkeys.

I am just back from shopping with teen DD. The more outrageous the clothes she tried on, the more I said "I love it! You should definitely get it". (Dress with a zip across the stomach so you can show plenty of flesh, skin tight, short, and and practically see through as well)

Result...they were all rejected. She bought jeans and a T shirt instead, in the sale, £15 for both. Ha, Ha, she will be warm and suitably covered. Go me!

Dds bf has been here since yesterday and there have been screens on since she got here.

Ds1 spent most of yesterday watching 6 nations rugby, both mens matches and the women's. He plays rugby and watching professionals play is beneficial to his own game.

All four kids have had multiple games of multiplayer Mario cart... During which they communicate and cooperate and never stop talking.

We let them watch a movie in dds room on my laptop and all four snuggled up on the bed and had a lovely time.

Dd and bf have hooked up their games of harvest moon and visited each others towns, again they chat and communicate constantly while they do this.

The girls have also been doing a craft activity on and off, they've played barbies and had a teddy bears tea party and lots of other stuff.. As well as attending mass with me this morning.

I see consoles and TV as valuable assets to play and interaction, not as detrimental to their social skills and thankfully I know bfs mother feels the same and won't be judging how much 'screen time' I've allowed.

It's stormy and wet here and bf had an operation last week so outdoor play has been a no go so they've effectively entertained themselves with the resources available.

The poster who said 'why shouldnt they waste a few hours of time at their age.'. That. 100%.