In assuming most men going on holiday alone to Thailand, are going to have sex with prostituted women or men?

[Grennie]

It is estimated that about 1% of Thailand's GDP is earned through sexual exploitation tourism.

In 2003 (the last year for which full figures are available) some 545,000 British residents arrived on visits. If you remove the children, and the British citizens visiting for business or reasons other than a holiday, you arrive at about 489,000—314,000 men and 175,000 women. That is 139,000 more British men than women coming to Thailand for a holiday—a gap of 28 per cent.

In no other international holiday destination, is there such a big difference in the number of women and men travelling there. There is no obvious reason for this apart from prostitution.

And that's the second highly personal trans attack on me this weekend. "Transist" attitudes are alive and well with some people who use something highly personal to attack someone with.

Oh, woe is me, poor me.

Come on, suck it up and get over it. It was a horrid thing to say to you. A cheap shot. Unimaginative.

This is AIBU though, like you have said before a few times to other posters when they have been offended by you! It's okay for you to use it as an excuse to be rude to people is it?

You both chose the low road instead of rising above. More fool you both.

i did not attack you until you told me to fuck off. twice. in a post which said it wouldld probably be deleted but you didn't care

in fact, it was the rationale for telling me to fuck off a second time.

no, nothing hateful or nasty there. you totally played the ball not the player that time

Chibi - if you had a vulnerability, something about yourself that you absolutely hated, would you want someone to attack you with that?

I understand from someone else that you are a quite nice person in real life.

Maybe you don't understand how much that got to me. I nearly killed myself last year because of how much I hate my body.

Then you use that to attack me.

please holly it is just lines on a screen - it is not your real life - give yourself a break

That women are being used as sex toys around the world and that is routinely underplayed is something that "gets to" a lot of women. Like maybe you don't understand. I have a young daughter and that she could be abused in life is my greatest fear.

Your posts have seemed aggressive and tbh you're gaslighting people by making them seem crazy for seeing a trend where an obvious trend is. Yes, men, a significant portion of them are going to Thailand purely to rape people of my sex. As a woman it's the worst thing I can think of.

And that isn't to say Chibi was right, but it was to say you were wrong too.

aren't i lucky then, to have no feelings, to not suffer, to never have anything ever going on in my life, so that needless and unwarranted aggression from a total stranger over a topic that affects them not a jot just rolllllllllllllls off me

i don't know who you are, but i can see you are very in touch with your feelings, other people aren't quite real to you, and you have a extremely well developed sense of entitlement

If I were as vulnerable as you say you are - I wouldn't give people I am having a heated debate with a reason to hit me where it hurts like that.

Like NigellasDealer says. It's just lines on a screen. We don't know you. You don't know us.

Follow the talk guidelines and none of this sort of stuff would be said.

Ok Chibi

I'm sorry for the personal attack.

is it mentioned somewhere on here that holly is trans? there are a lot of posts on here. this isnt nethuns. no nice tickers on the bottom.

thank you for your apology. i also apologise for responding at the same level.

it is frustrating to have to continually take the higher ground, not be goaded, consider the lurkers, not alienate the men, be a good ambassador for feminism etc when people are minimising harm to women and children. i think it made me snap

Like I said - I think the sex industry in the Far East is appalling and I don't think it should be minimised. I've seen it first hand. I've seen the absolute poverty in these countries and the exploitation.

So thanks for your apology.

When I was single I often went travelling on my own, I liked the sense of adventure and enjoyed meeting fellow travellers, many of whom I am still in touch with today. I went to Thailand a few times, as well as beaches and sunshine it has world class rock climbing and scuba diving venues, two sports that for several years I was passionate about and it was great visiting a country that allowed you to participate in both relatively cheaply. Strangely while there I did not get the overwhelming urge to procure the use of prostitutes, watch strip shows or pay to see some women blow ping pong balls out of her twat. Many of my fellow solo bloke travellers seemed not to be programmed to participate either, I guess we must have been the statistically odd ones.

Delurking, here. Holly, you are a woman. A trans woman, but a woman. Sorry to give you the heads up, but it's this: As a woman, you will probably get dissed every day. By males and females. Suck it up. You can't insult somebody then claim "special status" 'because you hate your body'.
To how the magazines sell and how popular the Daily Mail's Sidebar of Shame" is , I'd say a fair few women hate their bodies, not just trans women.
You don't get any special dispensation on a website that is primarily visited by women, just because you are a trans woman. That would give YOU too much room to be disingenuous.
Trans women definitely do not have sole ownership of "females who hate their bodies".
I would be interested if you could provide proof otherwise.
Furthermore, it would be useful to tell you that you do not give out insults and then expect the insult hurled back to cater to your ego. It wouldn't be an insult otherwise.
Trans woman or nay. Sometimes it's good to be a lady about these things.

So much 'Won't someone think of the poor men'. How terrible for them that people think that when they go to the sex tourism capital of the universe, they just might engage in sex tourism.

In answer to the OP. YANBU to think that most single men who go to Thailand, whatever their stated reason, are going to have sex with prostituted women, girls or boys. I have been to Thailand many times, as a backpacker, on business and as a tourist and each time I have witnessed men from each of these groups paying for sex. It is endemic. It's disgusting. So is being an apologist for it be use your Nigel wouldn't.

To the OP, YANBU. In fact, I would say that your numbers are conservative as they don't take into account groups of rapists who travel together.

Women and children are being raped on an industrial scale in Thailand. There is no violin in the world small enough for me to play in sympathy with poor menz who get the vapours because their holiday destination is considered suspect. In fact, it is creating a smoke screen for rapists when women can't name the problem without being called sexist. FFS!

Totally agree Flora.

In terms of triggering, there will be feminists on lots of these types of threads who have been exploited in the sex industry. Minimising the abuse, which is routine in these types of threads, is I know very difficult for women in this situation to deal with.

A good general rule - if you don't want to be insulted, don't insult others.

I knew a guy who went to Thailand on hs own and he freely admitted he wanted some cunt (transvestite surgically created cunt would have been ok too, though he said no to anything with a penis). He likes sex and is pretty ugly so paying is his only option for sex with anything attractive.

I agree Grennie.

property you are talking about people being raped. Please don't use the word "anything" about people.

Just out of interest - why are you posting in AIBU if you don't think YABU?

Some people have said they know single men who have gone for sex.
Some people have said they know single men who have gone for other activities.

Name the problem. That's important. Identify the problem.

I know what gaslighting is. But I do think that there are plenty of single men who go to Thailand on holiday alone or in groups of single men for holidays like diving and rock climbing.

I also think there are plenty of groups of single men who go there for sex. They go there in groups.

It's not gaslighting. It's not saying "but what about the menz". It's not dismissing the problem. It's just trying to be accurate.

Remember "all men are rapists". What effect did that statement have on feminism?

If this had been posted on a general forum with a mix of males and females on it - do you think you'd have got the same response or do you think you'd have got more disagreement and asking you for clarification?

Who said all men are rapists? There is a famous line that all men are potential rapists. And if you understand the context in which it was said, it is an uncontroversial statement.

Like I said upthread - if a male I knew said he was going to Thailand, I would not assume he was going there for sex.

But - if a divorced man with no interest in sport / beaches / culture and who had no luck with women said he was going to Bangkok - despite no interest in overseas holidays, I would assume he was going for sex.

That's the point I've been trying to make.