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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be surprised at the lack of food?

111 replies

NightCircus · 14/02/2014 17:09

Friend held a 50th birthday party at a social club type place.
It was from 7-12.
Band and disco.
Came with gift and bought own drinks.

Beforehand we had wondered if it would be a sausage roll/ sandwich buffet or maybe a vat of chilli or curry.
But there was no food at all! A number of guests were in their 70s.

AIBU to be surprised and think there should really have been something to eat?

OP posts:
formerbabe · 14/02/2014 17:42

Nooooo....I love a buffet...would have been extremely disappointed.

Original poster
NightCircus · 14/02/2014 17:42

Well I think that whilst some people on their 70s are fit and youthful others are slightly frail and more vulnerable.

OP posts:
harticus · 14/02/2014 17:43

YANBU
Party = food.
I once went to an engagement do that lasted all day and all they had was olives. I ate my own bodyweight in frigging olives and was thirsty for a week afterwards.

Bogeyface · 14/02/2014 17:43

Maybe its an Irish thing, but the thought of inviting guests for a party and not feeding them has brought me out in a cold sweat!

I am not Irish but my dad's family is and if there is a party you dont eat dinner, safe in the knowledge there will be enough food to feed every guest for a week and still be leftovers :o

whiteblossom · 14/02/2014 17:44

This seams to be the thing with people who want a 'do' but don't/can't pay for it. They say they are having a 'party' but don't hire a venue but arrange a meet up a bar, don't put on food and you pay for your own drink while the invitee brings a gift, starves and keeps having to put their hand in their pocket. Oh and the last one I went was just this, only they had cake to sing happy bday but that went back in the box and taken home...with all the gifts.

If you have a party for gods sake do it properly.

WorraLiberty · 14/02/2014 17:44

More vulnerable to what?

Forgetting to eat dinner before they go out for the night?

YANBU to expect food though. I don't think I've ever been to a party without at least some sandwiches.

But that wouldn't stop me eating dinner before going out.

whiteblossom · 14/02/2014 17:45

oh yadnbu.

chrome100 · 14/02/2014 17:46

YANBU. What person under 12 eats their tea before 7pm? I would have expected snacks at the least.

Poppylovescheese · 14/02/2014 17:46

YANBU its very odd to not to provide any sort of food.

jade80 · 14/02/2014 17:51

YANBU. Finding Glasgowsteve's comment about 'who would eat at 5pm and then again at 7, no need' quite amusing as the only people I know who eat their evening meal at 5pm are 6 and under! Most people I know eat their last meal around 7-8pm.

WorraLiberty · 14/02/2014 17:55

We eat our evening meal between 5 and 6pm but never later than that really.

Mind you, I see a party buffet as something to snack on when the drink gives you the munchies.

I wouldn't think of it as dinner, so would definitely eat before going out.

Daykin · 14/02/2014 17:57

Lots of people wouldn't have had time to eat at home if they needed to be at a party by 7. Anyway, it's not supposed to be a meal to fill you up, it's about togetherness, the breaking of bread, and manners.

pussycatdoll · 14/02/2014 18:00

Could you order food there ?

songlark · 14/02/2014 18:08

I've never heard of a party with no food, yadnbu. What I find odd is anyone who thinks it odd that it bothered you.

AnnoyingOrange · 14/02/2014 18:12

I would have expected crisps, nuts etc at least

WelshMaenad · 14/02/2014 18:14

YANBU. I'm of Welsh/Irish stock and it's just not done to invite people to anything without feeding them. I get twitchy and start trying to give soup and rolls to workmen if they're in the house more than a half hour. Five hour party, no grub? My grandmammy would be spinning in her grave.

WooWooOwl · 14/02/2014 18:15

Yanbu.

I don't mind a drinks only party, but not one that starts at 7.00.

For a 50th party where they have hired a band and a disco, they are tight as arseholes not to have provided at least something.

Alibabaandthe40nappies · 14/02/2014 18:16

glasgow who the hell has their dinner at 5pm?

OP - your 'hosts' were doing it on the cheap. A social club probably won't charge hire if they say that XX people are coming and will be buying drinks. So the party has cost them nothing, but cost their guests.

Bloody rude, and tight.

TeamEdward · 14/02/2014 18:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Amandaclarke · 14/02/2014 18:21

Bloody rude and something I just don't understand. I would never have a party without food and drink paid for, irrespective of where it is - brings me out in a cold sweat just thinking about it.

And who in hell has their dinner at 5.00pm?

Mintyy · 14/02/2014 18:25

Yanbu, never fails to amaze me how socially inept people can be.

BackforGood · 14/02/2014 18:26

Lots of people have their evening meal between 5 and 6 - perfectly normal thing to do. Just because all people don't keep the same time as you, doesn't make it odd.

Back to OP - I do think it's "expected" to put out some food at a party, but I wouldn't expect people to come out without having eaten - it's something to soak up the drink, not a main meal.

TheScience · 14/02/2014 18:27

I'd find it a bit odd that there wasn't even nibbles.

And who other than small children has dinner before 6pm? A 7pm start suggests evening meal time to me.

mewkins · 14/02/2014 18:30

Not unreasonable and it would upset me (what is a party without a good buffet and cake?!?! It's the best bit!) It annoys me at wedding receptions too.

Mintyy · 14/02/2014 18:30

I should think the number of people who have their main evening meal at 5pm are in a minority.