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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have felt quite uncomfortable with this situation?

122 replies

ClaudiusGalen · 08/02/2014 14:12

I have been having an ongoing telephone/broadband issue which could be the subject of a thread itself, but finally got a BT engineer to come out this morning.

About half-way through fixing the fault he asked if I was the account holder or my husband. I said it was me, he looked at my left hand and said 'Oh, if I'd have known you were single I'd have been flirting with you from the start'. I must have looked shocked because he then said 'oh sorry, I'm just a sucker for a pretty face'. I'm absolutely not attractive, so do not usually have to deal with these sorts of situations. I mumbled something about checking on the dog and left the room. A bit later he went outside to deal with something and when he came back in said 'It's cold out, I could do with a cuddle to warm up'. Then he winked at me.

As he was doing his final checks he asked for my phone number to test the line, then asked if I wanted his. I said no and he said that it didn't matter because he had mine and he knows where I live anyway. As he left the house he said he was sorry if he'd made me uncomfortable (must have been really obvious) but he just really liked my glasses!

AIBU to think that this was a really uncomfortable situation and that workmen should not make advances towards you in your own home?

OP posts:
bodandbagpusssittinginatree · 08/02/2014 14:50

Worse than creepy. Actually rather scary.

BrunoBrookesDinedAlone · 08/02/2014 14:51

Really really complain. Please go to the police too.

That sounds horrible. I can't believe he said that he knew where you lived so you didn't need to give him your number! That's very threatening. Not inappropriate behaviour - actual harassing, threatening behaviour.

Inappropriate behvaiour could perhaps be describing the first comment - out of order and embarassing and a disciplinary matter. Repeating that behaviour goes into harassment. Everything else you describe from there on is horrendous. His last comment the police would be interested in.

ClaudiusGalen · 08/02/2014 14:51

Still on hold. I have spent the last 3 weeks listening to Sky's hold music and strange advertisements. He was creepy, but he did fix a fault that both Sky and BT denied existed.

OP posts:
NotALondoner · 08/02/2014 14:52

I agree you are doing the right thing. What if you are not the first to complain about him? Maybe he does this wherever he goes :(

tinypumpkin · 08/02/2014 14:52

I agree about complaining. That sounds awful. I am sorry that you felt so intimidated. Not on at all. Hope you are able to make a complaint and get this sorted.

Pigeonhouse · 08/02/2014 14:52

You are absolutely right to complain. His behaviour was unprofessional, inappropriate and could be construed as threatening. Please make sure no one tries to fob you off.

Bahhhhhumbug · 08/02/2014 14:53

Yes to police here too - definitely. There could well be previous complaints about him , he obviously saves this behaviour for lone females - very predatory and inappropriate behaviour. My DH is a builder and used to be self employed , building conservatories/fitted kitchens for homeowners etc. and he has acquaintances in the trade who are similarly minded to this man when it comes to single females. There is no place for it in todays society - bleugh.

NotALondoner · 08/02/2014 14:53

Well he is paid to fix faults. It's not a reason for him to talk to you like that.

Bahhhhhumbug · 08/02/2014 14:54

,,,not that it was ever ok , but you know what l mean!

SooticaTheWitchesCat · 08/02/2014 14:55

A one off comment I would have ignored but he went too far and you shouldn't have been made to feel uncomfortable like that. Good for you for reporting him.

AmIthatWintry · 08/02/2014 14:58

Am glad you are reporting him. Creepy, intimidating and unprofessional behaviour

RnB · 08/02/2014 14:59

Thank is completely creepy, you poor thing. Please complain. My postman once offered to massage my sore neck and looked me up and down slowly when I was in my dressing gown (boak)

ClaudiusGalen · 08/02/2014 15:01

Sky have said they will pass the complaint onto BT as it is their engineer and they don't know who BT sent out. I have to say they didn't seem that concerned, but I have come to realise that their customer service is not worthy of the name.

OP posts:
JuniperHeartwand · 08/02/2014 15:03

You are entitled to complain to The police too, probably recommended in case he does contact you again. Call 101.

manicinsomniac · 08/02/2014 15:05

Don't know if you're still on hold but if so I would seriously consider not complaining. You are single and this man has your address, phone number and is an intimidating creep. He deserves punishing but I'd be far too afraid of a comeback.

justshabby · 08/02/2014 15:05

WTF. You're doing the right thing, OP. holds other hand

justshabby · 08/02/2014 15:06

I'd phone the police on the "I know where you live" comment.

TheFutureSupremeRulersMum · 08/02/2014 15:08

He said he had your phone number and knew where you lived. This is a data protection issue if he now contacts you for personal purposes. You should complain to BT too to make sure this is definitely dealt with.

ClaudiusGalen · 08/02/2014 15:10

I'm going to go to my sister's house for a couple of hours and then my BIL is going to come back with me later on. Feel a bit sick that he might come back, manic I hadn't thought of making it worse by complaining.

OP posts:
Gruntfuttock · 08/02/2014 15:11

I also think you should complain to BT yourself, rather than just relying on Sky doing it. If Sky didn't take you seriously, there are not going to relay your complaint to BT in a serious manner either (if indeed they contact BT at all)

expatinscotland · 08/02/2014 15:13

Tweet them and complain on their FB page, too. This person should lose his job.

expatinscotland · 08/02/2014 15:15

I'd tell the police, too.

MothershipG · 08/02/2014 15:17

Why don't you call 101 to ask for advice? This man has left you feeling so threatened that now you are worried about complaining! They will probably just tell you to keep your doors locked and your phone to hand but getting it logged might make you feel better?

So sorry this nasty creep has made you feel like this. Angry

HMG83 · 08/02/2014 15:18

Call 101 and log it with the Police.

FadBook · 08/02/2014 15:18

Call BT too, ask for a complaints dept

SoRry to hear this has happened

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