To think that married couples should not 'celebrate' Valentine's day?

[fadingfast]

It all seems a bit pointless to me, although to be honest I was never much of a fan even before I was married.

I would rather just do something to mark our wedding anniversary, but we always seem to end up giving each other cards in a rather half-hearted effort.

What do others do? Am concerned I might just be a cold-hearted and wizened old bag.

[SomethingkindaOod]

I love the idea of sending each other the same card every year, it really shows the passage of time and would be a lovely thing to show your DC's when they're older! If we'd have thought to do this maybe we would celebrate V-Day...
Tbh the years I spent working through college in a pub/restaurant really put me off, thankfully DH also worked there and feels the same. We would put on a night of it in the restaurant - 5 course meal, champagne, string quartet and a big band afterwards and it was stress all the way (not to mention a small fortune for the guests). The pressure to enjoy yourself and be romantic was second only to christmas and I saw loads of arguments. A few proposals and very sweet moments but a whole load of domestics!
The day will go unacknowledged here but as soon as the spring flowers come out DH will come home with a big bunch of daffodils for me (my favourite flowers).
YABU to say people shouldn't though, it's horses for courses isn't it?

[MmeGuillotine]

My husband and I always exchange presents on Valentine's Day BUT they're usually things that we bought for Christmas but didn't turn up on time so this year I'm getting some amazing earrings that I really badly wanted but couldn't afford to buy for myself and he's getting a game that I think he'd like. Nothing romantic and all hearts and flowers then as we aren't into that sort of thing.

We don't exchange cards but I do like to cook a really over the top dinner for us both. I dunno, we've been through a lot together in the last couple of years (my MIL's suicide etc) and our marriage hasn't always been easy so we like to make the most of ANY opportunities to make a bit of a fuss of each other.

[NaggingNellie]

I'd be really disapointed if i was expected to give Valentines Day , cuz I'm married,

like move over luv, he's bought the cow now hasn't he!!

[hollyhunter]

i dont want diamonds, or pearls.
i dont want flowers or money
i dont want chocolates or wine
i dont want a wedding anniversary card ( unless its a landmark one)

BUT I dowant a thoughtfully chosen valentines card.

But thats just me!

[queenofthemountains]

We celebrate it. Its the anniversary of when we got together and our wedding anniversary. This year will be our 10th wedding anniversary and we are going to Cornwall for our honeymoon, we always said we would go on our 10th anniversary.

I can't wait 4 whole days on our own, definitely worth celebrating.

[FarmerSueTickle]

We 'do' Valentine's Day, even after being married for 15 years. We either go out for a meal or either DH or I will cook something different.

It's never even occurred to me that someone else would have an opinion about it, let alone post it on a fucking forum.

[SignoraStronza]

Any excuse for steak and a blowjob. We usually exchange cards too and if he's been to London recently I might get a little something from Hotel Chocolat.

But we've only been married a couple of years.

[SignoraStronza]

Any excuse for steak and a blowjob. We usually exchange cards too and if he's been to London recently I might get a little something from Hotel Chocolat.

But we've only been married a couple of years.

[FootieOnTheTelly]

This thread is funny
Who said romance as dead....

[FootieOnTheTelly]

was not as

[Heathcliff27]

We do exact the same for valentines and for our anniversary. Nice bottle of bubbly and a takeaway, only difference is that he buys me flowers on our anniversary too. I've always told him not to bother on valentines day due to the horrendous price increase. We've been together for 15 years and still quite enjoy the romance of it.

Yes I agree with the "don't need a special day to be romantic blah blah" but sometimes with both of us working and having 3 kids we kind of forget to be romantic.

[vladthedisorganised]

Different strokes for different folks. I've never been one for going out for dinner on Valentine's day (can get the same thing for half price a week later) but DH and I have always got each other something.

I've never really been into the 'dozen red roses delivered to the office' type of romance, but some people are and that's fair enough. I do draw the line at declaring any day to be 'our two-month anniversary!' though - the clue is in the name and all that...

[fadingfast]

Why are we not allowed an opinion Farmersue? Is AIBU not intended to gauge opinions?? It was only intended as a lighthearted discussion, no intention to offend anyone else's point of view

[Custardo]

well I suppose if you have to carve a day to spoil yourself then go ahead.

Of course my marriage is so perfect that I am treated like the goddess I am all the time

[lanbro]

What a bunch of miseries! Each to their own but I like it. We're married and still recognise the date of our first date! It may be consumerist nonsense to some but so are lots of celebrations these days - Bonfire Night, Easter, Christmas to name but a few!

[ChippingInWadesIn]

Excuse - please play up to it & report back

Weegie - that's really brought tears to my eyes. Bastard illness needs to fuck the fuck off! :(

OliveGirl - my parents did that with their Christmas Card, it's lovely and my Mum still hangs it up each year, I dare anyone to stand next to me and say it's naff.

Amy106 - that sounds like fun :)

Vesta - you can remind them about wanting to 'share your romantic meal' when they have boyfriends/girlfriends & you want to go along


I love MN who needs a calendar when you have the annual threads

[TamerB]

For those who say they buy flowers etc on random days- you can do both you know!

[5Foot5]

Well February 14th IS our wedding anniversary - how romantic is that?

And 27 years in yes we do still send each other both anniversary cards and Valentines card.

The only thing we don't do anymore is try to go out for a meal to celebrate our anniversary because we long since found that unless you book ages in advance you can't get in anywhere deent and even if you do get a table they are usually crowded and over-proced.

We will cook an extra nice meal and eat in at home. With DD.

[higgle]

We have been married for 30 years in August and for us any excuse for a day of lurve will do. I will be expecting a card, breakfast in bed and lots of sex. To be repeated, plus a big pearly present and dinner out for wedding anniversary.

[RufusTheReindeer]

We still recognise the date of our first kiss!! I arranged for dd to be born on that date how romantic is that!!!! Ooh wait a minute....

[BaconAndAvocado]

We usually scoff an M and S meal deal and exchange cards and a box of chocs or too.

People,that don't celebrate it are killjoys IMO

[Littleen]

We sometimes have a little celebration, a card and perhaps go to pizza express or have an extra nice dinner at home - nothing fancy. We don't celebrate every year, it's a bit random whether we have time/money and if we're in the same location (last 2 years I've been commuting weekly and not been at home on valentines day)

Don't think it particularly matters regardless of relationship status. Do it if you want to, if not then don't! :)

[squoosh]

YABU

People want to sprinkle a little romance, sex and wine into an otherwise dull February day. Nothing wrong with that. A bit odd that you think people shouldn't do something that is intended to be fun.

I bet you're a proper HOOT.

[morethanpotatoprints]

YANBU and I agree with you.
However, card shops and florists rely on extra profits during this time, so at least it helps businesses.

[GTA5MASTER]

My husband and I got married on Valentines day so we always celebrate it as it means so much to us. We go away every year for a few days and have a fantastic time. I cannot wait until next week ;)
Btw why do you have to be young to celebrate it, love is love whether you are young or old it's just the same. I love a bit of romance! ;)