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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Next door neighbours and party in the garden.

113 replies

Twattyzombiebollocks · 01/02/2014 22:37

Not sure about this. Neighbours (their garden backs onto our front drive) are having a party in the back garden. They have a big marquee and its obviously a significant birthday, 18th I think. Music is currently blaring out, it's pretty noisy. I have 2 kids trying to sleep who are unable to, they have tv on trying to drown out the noise but its not working at all. What do I do? I don't want to be a party pooper but I would have thought they must realise that this is a residential area, most of the houses around here have young children.
I suppose it's a Saturday so at least they don't have school tomorrow.
What do you think is a reasonable time to go round and ask them to turn it down? I'm thinking leave it till 11?

OP posts:
echt · 02/02/2014 03:13

So parties are only for those wealthy enough to hire venues? Hmm

But they were rude not to warn you.

OrangeMochaFrappucino · 02/02/2014 03:32

You can hire places cheaply - the neighbours in the OP have hired a marquee which can't be cheap. I don't think anyone has the right to have loud music and excessive noise late at night. Noisy parties aren't an essential and they don't have to go on into the night. The right to enjoy your home and your peace is a basic right, I think. No one has the right to inflict a sleepless night on a street full of people. Why should they?

firedengines · 02/02/2014 03:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

firedengines · 02/02/2014 03:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

firedengines · 02/02/2014 03:56

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missingmumxox · 02/02/2014 04:22

On nice one, hire a venue ... Like a village hall, or scout hut, yes they are known for there noise insulating qualities !!!
I actually had less noise from the one next door to my house, than the one 1/4 mile away when we moved as the one 1/4 mile away had fields al around it, so the volume was at fucking 12!
We had a good relation osh with the one at the end of the garden, (sounds like ops issue) but we knew we would have parties going on, we would wait until midnight before complaining, we only had to complain 3 times in 6 year, twice they put the sound down straight away, once they told me to piss off, so I left put my party gear on and joined them, talking to everybody in the most embarrassing treaty old person way, and drinking the free booze, they where so shocked they didn't know what to do!
I repeated this when some college students did this in our apartment building in the US... Trust me it works a dream.

Back to the OP, it's one night I am with Worra. Basically due to you turning up the TV... That will help! But if it is rawly the 3rd time in a few months then you do need to log them with environmental health .

Hope you are sleeping sound now

Original poster
Twattyzombiebollocks · 02/02/2014 06:22

I did finally get some sleep (ish) music went on until 1 at that volume, then much quieter until 3. Kids fell asleep about 11.30 in the back room, baby woke up at 12 just as I was getting my coat on to go round and ask them to turn it down a bit so I couldn't go after all. She eventually went back to sleep just after they turned the music down and woke for the day at 5.
Going to pop round today and ask that in future could they please let us know in advance when the party will be (marquee has been up since Thursday so it could have been Thursday night Friday or last night) and if they could please have the music down to a reasonable level from 11pm. There is most definitely no shortage of money from what I have seen, both parents with a new car this year and the one who went to uni in September has a 2012 plate BMW presumably paid for by his parents, so they could easily have hired a venue, not to mention the cost of the marquee and caterers and disco.

OP posts:
chrome100 · 02/02/2014 07:26

It's only 1030. You are a party pooper! Grin

brettgirl2 · 02/02/2014 07:32

you weren't there chrome we had a party overt the back from us once and it was unbearable. Just so selfish some people have to work the next day, someone may be ill. Personally I couldn't enjoy myself knowing I was upsetting my neighbours. You can have a good time without having a night club in the back garden.

MrsCampbellBlack · 02/02/2014 07:33

I really wouldn't go round today. Just get on with selling your house, there are hopefully unlikely to be any more parties whilst you're still there.

They should have warned you though.

AnnaLegovah · 02/02/2014 07:34

Regardless of whether or not they can afford a venue, parties like this are never on. The selfishness of people who would never think to tell neighbours they intend to keep them awake all night astounds me. You'd be well within your rights to be noisy yourself this morning Wink.

But then I'm feeling particularly grumpy today having been woken up at 3am until almost 5am by my own neighbours coming home from a night out (celebrating the end of dry january Hmm and carrying on the party at home. Im tired now and it sucks.

EirikurNoromaour · 02/02/2014 07:38

Chrome Confused why did you post at 7.30 am saying it is only 10.30, when the thread had already clearly stated that they were playing music until 3am?

merrymouse · 02/02/2014 07:41

I think the "It's only once in a while, live and let live" thing only works if you have the good manners to warn the neighbours and if possible invite them. Otherwise you shouldn't be surprised if they don't talk to you and go straight to the council.

At least if somebody hires a venue (which can be done more cheaply than hiring a marquee), they are restricted by the terms of the licence.

OP, you should politely talk to your neighbours, because giving them the benefit of the doubt, if they think nobody minds, there is no reason for them to change their behaviour.

cricketballs · 02/02/2014 07:43

In terms of venue hire; very few places will accommodate an 18th due to the risk of under age drinking

thedogwakesuptoodamnearly · 02/02/2014 07:45

Don't hire a venue! Then the people near the scout hut (that's me) have to endure all the bloody parties! "Oh, New York New York again...that's a pleasant change"

MPB · 02/02/2014 07:56

Occasional house party is fine but I would find what they did unacceptable.

We lived next door to absolute wankers, who had bbq's whenever the sun came out and sat supping smoking and swearing all day with loud ridiculous dance music on. Happy hardcore stuff - if that is even a genre.

We moved as I thought they wouldn't take a request to turn the music down very well. I was right as I got so pissed off in the end I blasted them out when they had company and their music on a few times. And they didn't like it one bit.

Misspixietrix · 02/02/2014 08:29

I don't think YABU OP. I'm already dreading the summer when it gets warmer. One of the neighbours had a Barbecue/Party until 2 3 in the morming for three nights running Shock. I would have left it until the early hoursb(about 1am) and if the volume had not been lowered I would have rang 101.

chrome100 · 02/02/2014 08:31

No, I wasn't there. But we have neighbours who like to party - I do know what it's like. Only ours are a 13-bed house of students whose parties start at 11pm never mind end. It's not every weekend and it's only noise, no one will die. As long as its not all the time, I don't see the problem.

Mushypeasandchipstogo · 02/02/2014 08:38

I think your neighbours were very selfish even if it was just a one off. chrome the problem is that some people have to work the next day and is it fair for the OP's kids to have very little sleep too?

Oriunda · 02/02/2014 08:42

Am sitting here nearly comatose having been kept up until 1am with the neighbour's Saturday night drunken karaoke session, so I feel your pain and sympathise. It woke DS up and took me an hour to get him back to sleep, and then he woke at 6 this morning. I did actually knock on their door at midnight (never had courage to do that before) but other than screaming 'fuck off' at me whilst refusing to open door, nothing happened.

However, given that you are moving soon I would probably do nothing as you don't want to have to declare any disputes.

gualsa · 02/02/2014 08:43

They should have pre-warned the street. However police generally do not deal with noise and council only deal with statutory noise issues ie ongoing or regular.
If police were not too busy that night (sat night..hello?) they may have attended even from an anon call.
The only noise with a set curfew in law is I believe car horns and fireworks.
I would not risk falling out with neighbours by lecturing them on their social behaviour.

They were hugely inconsiderate. They should have pre-warned the street AND given an invite to their closest neighbours. Thats good etiquette.

YellowDinosaur · 02/02/2014 08:45

I'd be out there now mowing the lawn and using any power tools you can lay your hands on in the part of your garden nearest to their house...

YellowDinosaur · 02/02/2014 08:46

And let the kids play in the garden with all their noisiest toys

RustyBear · 02/02/2014 08:56

Yellow dinosaur - all that would do is wake up all the other neighbours nearby, who will also been kept up late by the noise of the party.

mumofthemonsters808 · 02/02/2014 09:05

If it's a one off, for me it would not be a problem. I had years of living next door to neighbours who held regular parties that begun at 9 and sometimes finished at 9 in the morning, it was hell on earth.